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Before i start, sorry if this is in the wrong thread, i'm not sure what category this belongs to.

So, when i was a child/ teen i wasn't nervous about getting a haircut even tho during some of that time i was already shy or socially anxious. I think its because i didn't think anyone would expect someone at that age to be super socially competend (like making smalltalk, explaining their wishes to the hairdresser etc.). As an adult i've been avoiding going to the hairdresser for a while now (i think two to three years(?)) and instead have cut my hair myself a few times(Just the ends, nothing drastic) and the last few times before that i only asked for a light trimm, because i felt like i was bad at explaining the cut i actually want.

I really want a (professional) haircut again and also stop avoiding that situation, but because its been so long and im still nervous about it i have a few questions:

  • is it ok to make an appointment in person and would it be rude to ask if their free on the same day
  • is it rude/ or annoying for the hairdresser if their Client doesnt talk
  • i remember that most hairdressers (atleast in germany) have tipjars, so how much do you tip
-do you think its stupid to show them a picture for a pretty simple/easy haircut instead of explaining it in detail (because i think usually you only show pictures to explain color or some really complicated hairstyle)



I know that these questions probably sound stupid, but i hope i still get serious answers: )
 

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is it ok to make an appointment in person and would it be rude to ask if their free on the same day?

I don't see how making an appointment in person would be a problem for them, likely it will be much easier for them. Unless this is a salon or stylist who only open it's doors to appointments. I imagine any salons with a physical store front will allow you to walk in to make an appointment. If not, that's probably bad for their own business.


is it rude/ or annoying for the hairdresser if their Client doesnt talk?

For the most part, I don't think it will really matter. They are probably more focused on doing their jobs to give you your cut to get you out of there efficiently. Some will be more chatty than others. Some will not say a single word in the duration. If you don't talk or appear untalkative, they will probably pick up the vibe and not talk as much themselves. But I guess that might be different in different cultures. I imagine the chit chatting thing is less so in Germany compare to America.


i remember that most hairdressers (atleast in germany) have tipjars, so how much do you tip?

Usually no less than 15%. But tip more if it's a stylist and salon you like and think you will return again on a frequent basis. But again, maybe the tipping customs and culture of this is different in Germany. Probably a better idea to ask your local communities and forums if you can.

do you think its stupid to show them a picture for a pretty simple/easy haircut instead of explaining it in detail (because i think usually you only show pictures to explain color or some really complicated hairstyle)?

No. You're the customer, you're entitled to give directions and be clear on what you want in whichever way you want to do so. Because you're paying for it.
 

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A lot of people ask for something called a “silent appointment” now:


I haven’t been to the hairdressers since March 2015, but when I still went, they didn’t mind that I didn’t talk because they would talk to each other instead (which made it feel weird, like I wasn’t there, but that’s okay).

Only the dentist seemed to care, because when I went once, the dentist and her assistant were talking about a little kid they saw before me and how it was nice to have kids as patients because “it’s nice to have someone to talk to.” That made me feel a bit uncomfortable for the rest of the appointment, like I was doing something wrong by not talking.
 
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Before i start, sorry if this is in the wrong thread, i'm not sure what category this belongs to.

So, when i was a child/ teen i wasn't nervous about getting a haircut even tho during some of that time i was already shy or socially anxious. I think its because i didn't think anyone would expect someone at that age to be super socially competend (like making smalltalk, explaining their wishes to the hairdresser etc.). As an adult i've been avoiding going to the hairdresser for a while now (i think two to three years(?)) and instead have cut my hair myself a few times(Just the ends, nothing drastic) and the last few times before that i only asked for a light trimm, because i felt like i was bad at explaining the cut i actually want.

I really want a (professional) haircut again and also stop avoiding that situation, but because its been so long and im still nervous about it i have a few questions:

  • is it ok to make an appointment in person and would it be rude to ask if their free on the same day
  • is it rude/ or annoying for the hairdresser if their Client doesnt talk
  • i remember that most hairdressers (atleast in germany) have tipjars, so how much do you tip
-do you think its stupid to show them a picture for a pretty simple/easy haircut instead of explaining it in detail (because i think usually you only show pictures to explain color or some really complicated hairstyle)



I know that these questions probably sound stupid, but i hope i still get serious answers: )
Hi! First all, I just want you to know this does not sound stupid at all! These are perfectly valid thoughts (especially for people who struggle with anxiety - I have definitely had similar thoughts as you!)

It would not be rude to ask if they were free that same day. Some places take walk-ins so that might work out!

It is not rude if you choose not to talk! You are there for a haircut, not to be the persons best friend. While talking might help the appointment go faster, it is not necessary in my opinion.

In my personal experience, I find getting a haircut a lot easier when I consistently go to the same hair stylist. This way I know her and she knows me. Maybe this would be helpful for you as well if you find someone you are comfortable with and you like their work!

As for tipping, that is completely up to you. I am not quite sure what the tipping etiquette is in Germany as I do not live there, but usually I tip 20 percent of the total cost of my haircut. Again, that is totally up to you though!

Wishing you a positive haircut experience! You got this. :)
 

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-It seems perfectly fine to make an appointment in person.
-As long as you're cordial and respond when the hairdresser asks you something, I wouldn't think the hairdresser would find you rude.
-Usually I tip $4-5 in the USA.
-Showing a picture helps them visualize just what you mean and isn't stupid at all.

Best of luck, let us know how it goes!
 

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Maybe it's different in different countries but here in Australia it's okay to just walk in and ask if anyone's free. I do it all the time. As for talking - the last time I had my hair cut the hairdresser actually told me she could tell I wanted to chat (which is often the case with me nowadays, I'm a bit of a talker) but often people just want to just sit there too. So either would be okay.

As for tipping I really don't know - I'd say it depends on the custom in your particular country. We don't tip here so its just a fixed price for the haircut, which is good.

It's funny - I used to find going to the hairdressers very nerve-wracking. I was a lot more self-conscious back then and just sitting in front of a mirror like that would be hard. Nowadays I like it and find it quite relaxing - it's funny how things change.
 

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A lot of people ask for something called a “silent appointment” now:


I haven’t been to the hairdressers since March 2015, but when I still went, they didn’t mind that I didn’t talk because they would talk to each other instead (which made it feel weird, like I wasn’t there, but that’s okay).

Only the dentist seemed to care, because when I went once, the dentist and her assistant were talking about a little kid they saw before me and how it was nice to have kids as patients because “it’s nice to have someone to talk to.” That made me feel a bit uncomfortable for the rest of the appointment, like I was doing something wrong by not talking.
This is genius. I always feel like inclusivity is exclusive of introverts, for some reason. Good if that's something that's starting to happen.

Was discussing with the lady friend last night about how I've been avoiding barbers again.

I'm pretty competent at self cutting now (lock down practice) but starting to push my comfort zone again, so this is going to be on the menu I'm sure.
 

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There was a time when I was not going out of the house for days and also not comfortable going to the salon to cut my hair for years. I used to tell my younger brother to cut my hair and the poor guy did the job so well. But that was many years ago. Now although I am quite bald now, I go to the salon and simply get the job done. Sometimes if some small talk happens, I talk. Other times, nothing more than hi-hello. The barber is usually quite focused on his job. Keeps twisting my head without uttering a word. So I don't have to talk either. Things go well and I get my hair trimmed. I pay and get out of there, feeling a little proud that I have got the job done despite all the anxieties and all. ;)
 
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