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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
First and foremost, hello. I'm new here :)

I have been feeling sort of weird lately. For some reason, I feel like my anxiety has gotten a lot worse. I keep avoiding people, the public. I have no interest in anything anymore. I feel so frightened to go out in places. Work is really stressful, and it used to be great, until I started really getting scared of getting a panic attack. I feel like I have gotten a lot more dull and lifeless. I don't know what happened to the happy me. I have lost friends over the years, and you could say I am much of a loner. I'm always home whenever I am not at school or at work.

For example, today I went to go to this office place to get a letter for my school. I felt tight, uncomfortable, and just, felt like everyone was staring at me, realizing that I am having anxiety. My biggest fear is that I appear out to be a weak person. Lately, I have been having this issue where I can't focus. For example, if I am having a conversation with someone, I can't really focus on what they're saying, because I'm so focused on my environment, and everyone around, and if they're looking at me.

My anxiety is really bad. Whenever I go out in public, and see people doing their jobs, they seem so content and calm. If I was to work somewhere like at a fast food restaurant, or office, I would be a nervous wreak.

It's catching up to me physically too. I feel so drained, so tired, so lifeless. I feel like there's no hope. All this anxiety took everything away. My confidence, my happiness, the future I SHOULD of had. I don't know why this happened to me, and I am such a mess.

Also, I signed up on a dating website. Now, whenever I talk to the guys on there, I feel guilty, because I have anxiety. I wouldn't want them to see me in person, not because of my physical appearance (that I am confident about), but the fact that I have no confidence, no personality (because I feel drained and lifeless from the anxiety,), being awkward and shy, yet I am having long conversations with them online. They live in my city, and I fear that I will end up bumping into them in real life, because if they were to see me, I wouldn't say anything, I would shake, and not speak much to them in person, and I think this whole site is making me more paranoid and sad to even start out with, but I feel bad because I have met some great people on there, but my anxiety scares people away.

I can't live like this. I am on medication (celexa), and I don't talk about it because I am so ashamed. I am a paranoid, anxiety filled mess. I can't even get out of my neighborhood whenever there is people out there. I just want to be in my room all day, which is what I usually do, or sleep all day. This isn't life, so I came on here, to ask for help, for advice. I have done it all.

Thank you <3
 

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:wel
I'm glad you joined this site - that's a positive step in itself. I hope you find lots of advice & support here. Many of us have very similar problems.
 

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happy i dodged a bullet
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I feel i could have wrote this, my anxiety has heighten to the point I feel there is no escape from anxiety. .even at home I have slight panics..and I also feel ashamed which is why I keep my distance from my bestie. She leads such and interesting fun life, and im just existing. .and I dont ever want her to find out abt how anxiety is controlling my life....as far as dating, I try not to get all gussied up bc id attract potential mates..and i just dont want to hamper anyone dwn with my problems. ..

But I understand you, its hard...but hopefully it will get better.

Welcome to sas :)
 
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