I've never heard anyone describe what I'm about to, but I can only conclude it is part of the spectrum of social anxiety:
For the past few months, maybe almost a year, I've this strange anxiety. I can't really explain it thoroughly in one sentence, but here are some thoughts that go through my head:
"What if there comes a point where I just run out of things to talk about with that person? Regardless of how close we are, I feel that I am so strange and boring and unique and incompatible, I will just run out of things to talk about one day, forever."
"Boy, I love having my Disneyland annual pass. But what happens after I go there enough to where I've visited every nook and cranny of the place? Will my love for it go stale? Why can't it be infinite? Why is it so relatively small?"
"I love Doctor Who. But what happens after I finish the series? And read all the Wikipedia articles on it? I feel very strongly about this show, but why is it so limited, when I never want it to end?"
"That's a great poem you just wrote! But what if there comes a day when you run out of things to write about? There are such limitations in language, it is inevitable there will be a day where you run dry of ideas."
Basically, I suffer from an anxiety of limits and ends. It is one of the worst feelings ever. I've never heard of anyone feeling the same way about things. But I am desperate to know if anyone out there knows how I feel, or has a term for how I feel.
I want this feeling to go away, more than anything. I cannot ****ing stand it anymore and I don't know what to do.
For the past few months, maybe almost a year, I've this strange anxiety. I can't really explain it thoroughly in one sentence, but here are some thoughts that go through my head:
"What if there comes a point where I just run out of things to talk about with that person? Regardless of how close we are, I feel that I am so strange and boring and unique and incompatible, I will just run out of things to talk about one day, forever."
"Boy, I love having my Disneyland annual pass. But what happens after I go there enough to where I've visited every nook and cranny of the place? Will my love for it go stale? Why can't it be infinite? Why is it so relatively small?"
"I love Doctor Who. But what happens after I finish the series? And read all the Wikipedia articles on it? I feel very strongly about this show, but why is it so limited, when I never want it to end?"
"That's a great poem you just wrote! But what if there comes a day when you run out of things to write about? There are such limitations in language, it is inevitable there will be a day where you run dry of ideas."
Basically, I suffer from an anxiety of limits and ends. It is one of the worst feelings ever. I've never heard of anyone feeling the same way about things. But I am desperate to know if anyone out there knows how I feel, or has a term for how I feel.
I want this feeling to go away, more than anything. I cannot ****ing stand it anymore and I don't know what to do.