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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Since I jumped the gun a bit with my first few posts I thought I could drop by here and give a proper introduction.

I turned 18 back in February and have been in and out of school over the past five years, trying to fill a void that I've been noticing since eighth grade.

There would be periods where I would stay afloat, but just barely. I gradually felt myself becoming distanced from my friends. I've gone from popular friends, to modest ones, and those in between.

Each time I lose myself and stop going to school, I alienate myself from these people. The longest interval was 5 months, the one I'm going through during my senior year.

Only because I kept myself grounded during sophomore and junior year am I going to graduate. My high grades and achievements covered the rest, and I'm being tutored to cover my missing days.

None of this would be as bad, if I had never gotten out of my shy phase. There was a period of 2 years, the last two of middle school, where I had found my outlet: humor. I was outgoing because I could be spontaneously funny. As soon as I noticed this skill, it began to fade as my animosity toward myself increased through the years.

By sophomore year I could not walk up to people and get them histerically laughing anymore, just people I was comfortable with. By junior year, I had trouble just having a conversation with my friends. By senior year, I felt completely isolated in a classroom, especially when we were given free time.

This would be fine on it's own. Manageable to say the least. But now, I don't want to be a typical high school/college graduate and be satisfied with 100k a year because "it's a good living" and "being rich corrupts" like the media and movies want you to think.

I want to be part of the counterculture; not just because I consider it my only reliable therapy, but because it ignores all the ignorance and hatred that fuels many people in this world, including our own vicious cycles of social anxiety.

And maybe, just maybe, being apart of something could allow me to be just a little bit less anxious.
 

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Because I can!
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Welcome to SAS! It's good to meet you. You kind of lost me at counterculture though... perhaps you might elaborate? :)
 

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Hey axiomcomplex92 welcome. :hyper
 

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Welcome, AxiomComplex92! :)
 

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:wels
 
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