Joined
·
684 Posts
So I just kind of got into a long-distance relationship with a girl. This story goes a long way with not much holding us back, except distance. Basically in the beginning I went to a birthday that was out of town (an hour drive) and it ended up being at a bar in this city. I was drunk of course, giving out my actual personality, lowering my anxiety to a very high extent as usual... and this girl that I find attractive comes up to me (or the group I was in sitting at the table) and starts talking to us, and I just went with it and she got a friend to take a picture of us with our arms behind our backs... not know these pictures would be posted on facebook a day after I ask some other chick out at work.
After I ask this chick out at work with her saying "I need time to think" I basically gave up from there... of course being prepared for rejection before hand. The next morning the pictures on facebook show up with me and this other chick tagged, and I was just like wtf?, whatever I'll go with this... and that following night at work some other chick that knew the chick I asked out asked me how the night was getting wasted, nothing about that other girl... I said "Oh yeah it was awesome, I got wasted". So the chick at work that I asked out is still a good friend of mine, she has not mentioned anything about facebook and she has me added on facebook and not her friend, so I know she talked to her friend about it. Maybe she was actually interested in me after I asked her out, but definitely not after the facebook pictures.
I don't know if I should admit defeat to her even though I am not interested in her except to remain friends, or just keep it to myself.. should I say anything?. And so the story goes on with this other chick that lives an hour away from me. And I am desperately in need of advice since i have never been in a serious relationship before. I've had oppertunities in woman I didn't feel attracted to, but never carried into a relationship with them because I wasn't interested obviously. But this chick I was definitely. She added me on facebook and posted more pictures of me and her. Also posted on my wall to wall with her, saying "coooooommeee baaack!!!", obviously meaning me.
These were all great signs, though I was on the verge of taking it slow in the beginning of my relationship with her. So I go back and see her at the bar again, we have a good time and then I go home the next day, started texting her... she said she was suprised that I was ambitions (for asking her how she felt and what she had planned etc). Also said "I guess I get what I deserve" afterwards later on. All good signs.
She later said that our schedules are screwed since she had two jobs and I worked evenings, our days off are totally different too... and so she finally had a day off so she came to my city in the morning tired just barely making it since her car is a ford and keeps having problems. We had a "breakfast date" and I spent time with her for the first time while not drunk. It went well and we watched a movie after going out for breakfast... then I "hugged" her before she left and texted her as she left.
The hardest thing that I go through is texting her and not getting a text back at all or not until later, or even if it's later it may have nothing to do with what I asked her which was important or whatever. So I've tried just giving it time and forgetting about her even texting me in the first place and waiting for her to text me first. I'm sure someone here has experienced the same kind of thing. So I am going to see her in her city while staying at a friends place. I always say "Love you!!" at the end of my facebook messages or some texts but she doesn't really say it back yet. She has mentioned twice "I was just thinking of you" and "I had a dream about you, can't remember what happened" so I know she is really interested in me. I know it all takes time but, my last question is... how do I ask her or just blend in to be her actual boyfriend, rather than just friends, how does it all work... it's all common sense to *experienced* people I know but this is my first and only relationship I've ever had.... how should this all play out?.
After I ask this chick out at work with her saying "I need time to think" I basically gave up from there... of course being prepared for rejection before hand. The next morning the pictures on facebook show up with me and this other chick tagged, and I was just like wtf?, whatever I'll go with this... and that following night at work some other chick that knew the chick I asked out asked me how the night was getting wasted, nothing about that other girl... I said "Oh yeah it was awesome, I got wasted". So the chick at work that I asked out is still a good friend of mine, she has not mentioned anything about facebook and she has me added on facebook and not her friend, so I know she talked to her friend about it. Maybe she was actually interested in me after I asked her out, but definitely not after the facebook pictures.
I don't know if I should admit defeat to her even though I am not interested in her except to remain friends, or just keep it to myself.. should I say anything?. And so the story goes on with this other chick that lives an hour away from me. And I am desperately in need of advice since i have never been in a serious relationship before. I've had oppertunities in woman I didn't feel attracted to, but never carried into a relationship with them because I wasn't interested obviously. But this chick I was definitely. She added me on facebook and posted more pictures of me and her. Also posted on my wall to wall with her, saying "coooooommeee baaack!!!", obviously meaning me.
These were all great signs, though I was on the verge of taking it slow in the beginning of my relationship with her. So I go back and see her at the bar again, we have a good time and then I go home the next day, started texting her... she said she was suprised that I was ambitions (for asking her how she felt and what she had planned etc). Also said "I guess I get what I deserve" afterwards later on. All good signs.
She later said that our schedules are screwed since she had two jobs and I worked evenings, our days off are totally different too... and so she finally had a day off so she came to my city in the morning tired just barely making it since her car is a ford and keeps having problems. We had a "breakfast date" and I spent time with her for the first time while not drunk. It went well and we watched a movie after going out for breakfast... then I "hugged" her before she left and texted her as she left.
The hardest thing that I go through is texting her and not getting a text back at all or not until later, or even if it's later it may have nothing to do with what I asked her which was important or whatever. So I've tried just giving it time and forgetting about her even texting me in the first place and waiting for her to text me first. I'm sure someone here has experienced the same kind of thing. So I am going to see her in her city while staying at a friends place. I always say "Love you!!" at the end of my facebook messages or some texts but she doesn't really say it back yet. She has mentioned twice "I was just thinking of you" and "I had a dream about you, can't remember what happened" so I know she is really interested in me. I know it all takes time but, my last question is... how do I ask her or just blend in to be her actual boyfriend, rather than just friends, how does it all work... it's all common sense to *experienced* people I know but this is my first and only relationship I've ever had.... how should this all play out?.
