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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
I wanted to get some advice on how other's might handle the feeling that people are unsafe. This is how I feel all of the time. To me PEOPLE are UNSAFE. I grew up in Alaska. I've seen bears in the wild and felt fine. I feel safe around wild bears. I feel Unsafe around people. I know that there is supposedly something "wrong" with that. The thing is that the bears don't bother me, they go about their business. People on the other hand have been mean, hurtful, and verbally attacking. My problem is that I withdraw and become isolated and lonley. I need to find a way out of this cycle. I would like to hear from anyone who feels the same way. I'd like even more to hear from someone who has been able to break away from these feelings.

When I try to break the cycle, I have the same experiences to validate my theory that people are dangerous. I really want to have a warm, safe friend and I need some help and support from you all to get me there.

How to you stop from withdrawing and become and open??
 

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I think the lower you are feeling, and the more anxious and depressed you are feeling, the more negative interactions with other people happen to you. So it is like a big negative downward spiral. The less you resonate with the people around you and with the universe the more conflict you come into. The more negative conflicts you have with other people the less you resonate with people in general. Very vicious. I wish I could help but I'm in the same boat. :(


Good luck!
 

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I can relate. I have no problem doing things that most people find frightening, most people probably think i'm crazy because of that. But when it comes to people, and socializing, I'm feel like a little mouse.

And yeah, the experiences I've had with people usually end up negative and reinforcing my SA.

As for a solution, wish I had one...
 

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That's a tough one. I withdraw too when I feel vulnerable. If I feel like I'm going to be humiliated or rejected somehow then my natural reaction is to close myself off to that danger.

How does one stop withdrawing? I'm not sure. I guess it takes a conscious effort. You have to recognize that closing yourself off is only going to hurt your relationships.

And you should probably also recognize that if you open yourself up and do end up getting hurt it won't be as bad as you think. It won't be pleasant, but you'll be able to handle it.

So your choices are withdraw and experience the pain of loneliness, isolation, etc. or open up to people and experience the possible pain of rejection, humiliation, etc. I think it's worth the risk to open up. Withdrawing is kind of a dead end, whereas opening up has a lot of pleasant possibilities.
 

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Discussion Starter · #5 ·
Thank You All

I just wanted to say thank you to each of you. I know there is no magic solution. It has helped just knowing that other people have the same struggles. There is comfort in writing your fears and getting a supportive response.

I WILL keep trying, just feels so heavy sometimes, uuuhh, big sigh.
 
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