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Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Hm, well...

It is a bit surreal, but i was accused of having some sort of affair (?) with some girl who is engaged. The reason i was accused was due to a pun in a FB pm to her. The pun in no way was sexual. I also highlighted that it was a pun, specifically calling it a pun in the pm.

However her fiancee had a 'fight' with her on account of this, and so now she told me that it was due to my fault. So i broke the FB link and don't plan to go to the working place of hers again (a sort of public place).

It is a bit nasty, cause i felt offended as well. I never gave any liberty to anyone to accuse me of such things. I only saw her fiancee two or three times in three years that i go to that library/bookstore. I suppose i won't go there again anyway, which is ok, just a bit ugly like i said.

I can accept that the message was a bit playful, but i know that person for years and often i spoke in puns while in the library. For what it's worth i never had any intention of even seeing her in a sexual way, and the fact she is engaged also would make that entirely idiotic.

*

I guess such things happen. Accused of befriending someone in such a way. Still surprises me, but i am sure the point of view of the other people also is correct in their turn.

Also very strange that today (and yesterday) i pretty much set the foundation for a social circle in the book/lit circuit here. So the above story leaves an even stranger sense... :(
 

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Sounds like the guy she is engaged to is an insecure jerk. I obviously don't know the exact words you used or any other details of the situation, but from what you mentioned it sounds like you didn't do anything wrong.

I would let her know that the notion of it being your fault for starting the fight is ridiculous.
 

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yeah some guys get jealous easily, and controlling, they think that if a guy just talks to their girlfriend/wife having friendly conversation that they must be trying to get into their pants, a paranoid controlling guy though can lead to an abusive relationship, this girl should be reading the signs early now before commitment, but unfortunately a lot of girls think they will end up alone if they don't hold tight to a guy that shows interest in them, love is blind also....
 

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Discussion Starter · #4 ·
Thank you both for your replies...

Well, the pun is not translatable in English, which is why i did not mention it. It was a wordplay about "having fun" and "don't become pieces", which in this language has an etymological tautology in the terms used. But she insisted that the term for pieces (which aluded to being drunk; she would be in a party, with her fiancee too and other people) should be "only spoken if one is one's parent or a sexual relation". Moreover another girl who was there at the time claimed that this is true in her view too.

I never saw it that way, of course, or i would have never made the pun (and again i noted specifically it was a pun in the very same brief pm). But they did. I apologised, but in the end felt also offended, and now just erased the FB connections with the 5 people in that place who i came to know to a degree these 3 years. I also sent a pm to the other girl there at the time, saying that if she wants to she can inform her friend that i am sorry for the dreadful misunderstanding, deeply sorry for the situation which seemed to arise from it, and thus i am closing the FB connections with the bookstore.

Obviously i could not send this message to the clerk, cause it would be like feeding the bad temper which appears to now exist. Anyway, i felt very sad for all this. But i suppose on my part i should for one be a bit more careful in such social situations, and also to take it entirely for granted that i won't be going there again and i just hope the people in that relationship are just in a bad phase and will get over it etc.

A sad story, but i guess it can happen, even to an introverted person like myself.
 

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I was a pun, no biggie. I dunno why some people take FB so seriously. She should have blamed the FB creator in the first place.
 

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Discussion Starter · #6 ·
Thanks again :)

A sad story. I guess i mostly felt bad due to imagining that her current relationship faces issues. But it is neither my fault nor my business, and will not return to that place again.
 
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