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I have lost 120 pounds, I have more energy, more confidence and determination that never existed. But with this new found respect for myself comes very complex changes.

1. Being known as the "guy who lost weight" - This irks me sometimes because I am not defined by this only distinction, and want to be known for more. This distinction only heightens my anxiety to achieve.

2. The anxiety that comes from a positive accomplishment - I had average anxiety when I was growing up, now it has skyrocketed profoundly. I feel expectations never once graced upon me. I get so overwhelmed from all this positivity that the "fat kid" expects in me wants the ball to be dropped.

3. Fitting in but not really - Weight loss is not an everyday occurrence, people who lose a lot of weight are as rare as two snowflakes looking alike. It is like a slap in the face to do something that fits you in but at the same time makes you a secular for this achievement.

4. All the emotions that come with weight loss - I went from a lazy, morbidly obese loser who had no job and no aspirations to do anything to someone who gets excellent grades in college, new found lease on life and lighter but not skinny. Having people compliment you physically and girls crushing on you is not always the greatest thing in the world. Having your life turned upside down in such a short time is very heavy on my shoulders.

5. The attitudes that come with weight loss - People always say that I have determination, but I say that I had nothing to lose when I began. Determined means that I would still be working at it, but I still indulge in my favorite foods all the time. It gets easier but at the same time my brain tells me that I deserve from being healthy and eat a burger from Wendy's

The reason I wrote this is to show that weight loss can have an ugly side. It is not a bed of roses even when it is done. It seems that no one talks about it.
 

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I can relate to some parts. Ive always been skinny. Thing is, once puberty dawned on me, i stacked some muscle on top of my skin and bones, and i became more self aware, expectations seemed high for me too. Girls crush on me all the time and i cant take the pressure. Guys expect me to be the "sports guy," but im so self conscious and nervous when i play sports, i feel like im gunna die. not to mention it makes me look like a spaz and an idiot (the anxiety that is). I wish i could just forget about trying to be perfect and just relax. thats all i want. to relax
 

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the same thing happened to me. i used to have severe acne and fat(i'm asian so 105 lbs is fat). i lost 5kgs and my acne, and guys started to get fresh and creepy, but they didn't give a damn about me when i was fat. i rejected them flat out but they never quit. it's weird and i can't deal with it. people started thinking i'm rich because i look better than most people, but the truth is i live in poverty and i'm just hygienic. i hate expectations.
 

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Because I am a night owl I used to go to my gym late at night. It closed at midnight and right at 11.30pm a dozen super fat people would come in. You could tell they were coming in that late so people wouldn't see them. It made me so sad. Its bizarre how much people care about this.
 

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I have lost 120 pounds, I have more energy, more confidence and determination that never existed. But with this new found respect for myself comes very complex changes.

1. Being known as the "guy who lost weight" - This irks me sometimes because I am not defined by this only distinction, and want to be known for more. This distinction only heightens my anxiety to achieve.

2. The anxiety that comes from a positive accomplishment - I had average anxiety when I was growing up, now it has skyrocketed profoundly. I feel expectations never once graced upon me. I get so overwhelmed from all this positivity that the "fat kid" expects in me wants the ball to be dropped.

3. Fitting in but not really - Weight loss is not an everyday occurrence, people who lose a lot of weight are as rare as two snowflakes looking alike. It is like a slap in the face to do something that fits you in but at the same time makes you a secular for this achievement.

4. All the emotions that come with weight loss - I went from a lazy, morbidly obese loser who had no job and no aspirations to do anything to someone who gets excellent grades in college, new found lease on life and lighter but not skinny. Having people compliment you physically and girls crushing on you is not always the greatest thing in the world. Having your life turned upside down in such a short time is very heavy on my shoulders.

5. The attitudes that come with weight loss - People always say that I have determination, but I say that I had nothing to lose when I began. Determined means that I would still be working at it, but I still indulge in my favorite foods all the time. It gets easier but at the same time my brain tells me that I deserve from being healthy and eat a burger from Wendy's

The reason I wrote this is to show that weight loss can have an ugly side. It is not a bed of roses even when it is done. It seems that no one talks about it.
:):) I am a poor girl. have a plan to control my weight this summer, but seems very hard, more food but less sports everday, now i am already 60kg, i am sure 174cm,55kg is best, so should have more sports from now on :yes
 

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I see what you mean. I haven't been really fat in 6 years. But that reflection of that still drives me in the gym and whatever I do. I tend to be hyperfocused and I have to do things down to a routine and if I miss one thing, I feel like I didn't do it right and it'll make a huge difference and I'll be fat again, when really, it won't. But it's that fear that drives me to do better and it's that fear that makes certain things hard to let go of and do. If I don't exercise at least one every 2 days, I just feel like total crap. I won't have a soda unless in a mixed drink. I shun sweets and extremely picky about what I eat, although I do eat a lot.

When I show people old pictures of me they were like "that was YOU?" I already passed by the "Jared" phase now I'm at the point where people think that's the way I always been lol.
 

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I'm 6 feet tall and weigh 243 pounds
am I obese ?
I would say so. If you can cut that down to 180, thats a huge step. by no means are you off the deep end if you catch my drift. You are still definitely light enough to do serious physical activity to get back into shape. Diet and exercise are not easy. Good thing is, exercise reduces anxiety a lot, so you can hit two birds with one stone.
 

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:):) I am a poor girl. have a plan to control my weight this summer, but seems very hard, more food but less sports everday, now i am already 60kg, i am sure 174cm,55kg is best, so should have more sports from now on :yes
At 174 cm, 60 kg is a normal weight - 55 kg would make you underweight.

Have a nice day,
Kelly :)
 
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