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    I have a therapy appointment today, this will be my first time back in therapy after almost a year. I had lost hope in therapy and everything else for a while. I really hope that both of us will benefit from therapy. I will have to let you know how it goes after today. And you shouldn't be embarrassed or think about deleting your posts, i just found this forum and by reading what others have to say, especially you, gave me enough courage to reach out for help and be brave enough to talk about my problems on here as well. I think we are a part of the right forum and we are both going to meet others like us so we can all help each other get through this. But anyway thank you so much for replying back, you have no idea how much that means to me.

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    Hi this is Kristen again, I just got your message and I was really surprised and happy to see that you wrote back!! Yes I have been going to therapy on and off for years and have also had a psychiatrist that tried medicating me. It seems like nothing has helped changed this, its like a deeply deeply ingrained habitual way of thinking, feeling, and acting/reacting. To change those patterns and ways of thinking and living almost seems like someone suggesting to stop making your lungs suck in and out air, or to make your heart stop beating. It just feels so involuntary and natural.
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