Went out without straightening my hair - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-06-2018, 08:18 PM Thread Starter
Joz
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Went out without straightening my hair


I know it sounds silly but for the past 5 years I haven’t gone out of the house without having straightened my hair first. I live in a city where people always dress up and wear make up etc. I have unpredictable curly hair that I’ve never felt comfortable with partly because 95% of the people I see have straight/straightened hair and in the past some people have laughed at my hair and said if they had hair like mine they’d straighten it. Although I do get compliments the negative comments always seem to override them. And I don’t like being the centre of attention.

But now that I’m 30 I’m trying to be more comfortable with myself. My hair is my hair and no one else’s. Who cares what they think and how messy it can look when it’s windy 🙄
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post #2 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-06-2018, 10:08 PM
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Maybe they said that because they wouldn't know how to manage curly hair and I'd guess straight hair is easier to manage. I once had a two girls near me chatting about hair and one of them said "I'd never have straight hair. Straight hair looks ****ty". I was thinking to myself, what the hell, was that a dig at me or something (because my hair is almost always straight). Who says that? You don't see many people with curly hair these days so when you do, it's different to see. People who are different stand out, but that's not a bad thing, I'm always drawn to people who have a different style to everyone else. Good on you though for wearing your hair natural, I hope you can continue doing it.

So come rain on my parade
'Cause I want to feel it
Come shove me over the edge
'Cause my head is in overdrive
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post #3 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-07-2018, 03:01 AM
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Oh yeh I remember going through this with make up like first few times felt uncomfortable and now I only wear it if I need to. Which is more like a lazy thing cause I canít be bothered sitting there and contouring everyday. Or having black mascara rub under my eyes or wearing water proof mascara that is harder to get off xD saying that Iím about to be 29 and need to get back in my game maybe. Also my bf is ldr. So it is easy to not want to make an effort when he is not around! Which actually might sound effed since I should just make myself feel good by looking good 👍

Oh God do your hair how ever you want, I wouldnít let someone put me down by telling me I needed to straighten my hair.
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post #4 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-08-2018, 06:27 PM Thread Starter
Joz
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Haha yeah it sounds like such a silly thing but what I look like is a bit of an issue for me. I always think when people look at me they might think I’m weird looking or ugly etc so I feel like I just try to blend in nowadays. Gone through a few weird clothing style phases in the past though!

Yeah you’re right makeup’s a similar thing too. I rarely wear it and don’t feel comfortable wearing it except on a night out.

And no they were being mean. One of the people is my sister (most of my family have straight hair including aunties, cousins etc). My grandma would always cut my pony tail off and then my hair would blow out like a sideways Afro and I’d get laughed at. So I’ve always felt like it’s a bad thing even though I love curly, frizzy, wild hair on other people.

Oh well maybe 2 steps forward and only one step back 🙂
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post #5 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-09-2018, 02:48 AM
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Iíve noticed curly hair making a comeback in the last couple of years though. I also straighten my hair a lot but only until itís wavy because I donít have a straight hair face.
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post #6 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-12-2018, 05:08 PM
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It's great to go out and just not give a **** what others think of you. Have you seen them before? Are you going to see them again? IF no and no, then it really doesn't matter. I mean the IDGAF attitude may not make any friends but at least when you aren't looking for anyones approval, it can insulate you from caring about other people's opinions of you allowing you to just go about your day.

"It's better to be prepared for an opportunity and not have one than to have an opportunity and not be prepared." -- Whitney Young Jr.
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post #7 of 7 (permalink) Old 11-14-2018, 05:57 AM Thread Starter
Joz
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Yeah in my mind I say to myself that I don’t care what others think, but when it comes down to it I must care or else I wouldn’t get anxious in social situations in the first place. If I’m with people I know I’m ok. It’s more when I’m out by myself when the anxiety hits me.

I’m improving though and oneday when I’m too old and tired I actually won’t care!!
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