Post Here Whenever You Take A Positive Step - Page 5 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #81 of 129 (permalink) Old 05-29-2019, 04:59 AM
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Congratulations on doing all this! You deserve a lot of credit. These can be challenging undertakings. For myself, at concerts, I try to remember I'm there for the music and I hone in on that and if something social comes about as well, then that's an added bonus. It'll hopefully make it easier to be there with your boyfriend. Have a good time!!

Thank you! I will try my best and keep you posted. Hope you're seeing some improvements as well.

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post #82 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-05-2019, 12:43 AM
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I managed to get out of bed before 9am! Usually I wake up around mid day so this is really early for me
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post #83 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-05-2019, 09:47 PM Thread Starter
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I finally told my mum I want to see a therapist. I’ve been waiting to do this since December, when I thought I should try it again.
https://m.imgur.com/FsoxPo2

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post #84 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-06-2019, 03:24 PM
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I finally told my mum I want to see a therapist. Iíve been waiting to do this since December, when I thought I should try it again.
https://m.imgur.com/FsoxPo2
I'm glad you managed to do this.

And I agree with you - it is hard when there's people around.

You'd probably like the therapist I saw a while ago - he's a really nice older guy, very clever and doesn't try to push you or anything. He's up in Eltham though so would be a long way. Hopefully you can find someone closer to you. There's always that thing where they give you 6 or 10 free visits to a psychologist? You just go to a GP and they write up a mental health plan on the computer for you. I've done that a few times - they'll do it without any worries at all.

I hope you can find someone nice.
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post #85 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-06-2019, 09:56 PM Thread Starter
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I'm glad you managed to do this.

And I agree with you - it is hard when there's people around.

You'd probably like the therapist I saw a while ago - he's a really nice older guy, very clever and doesn't try to push you or anything. He's up in Eltham though so would be a long way. Hopefully you can find someone closer to you. There's always that thing where they give you 6 or 10 free visits to a psychologist? You just go to a GP and they write up a mental health plan on the computer for you. I've done that a few times - they'll do it without any worries at all.

I hope you can find someone nice.
Thanks. My mum wants me to try talking in public before I look for one because I keep telling her Iíll do it, but then get too scared to because there are too many people around. I did it twice today (only to her) and it wasnít as bad as I thought.

Most therapists would have to be better than the one I had last time (the only time) and the one you saw last week. I had the health plan last time, and thatís what Iíll do again.

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post #86 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-06-2019, 10:44 PM
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Thanks. My mum wants me to try talking in public before I look for one because I keep telling her I’ll do it, but then get too scared to because there are too many people around. I did it twice today (only to her) and it wasn’t as bad as I thought.

Most therapists would have to be better than the one I had last time (the only time) and the one you saw last week. I had the health plan last time, and that’s what I’ll do again.
Yeah I thought that looked like what your Mum was wanting - it would be hard for you though.

And yeah, in a way I wish you could come and see Adrian (my last therapist) - he would at least be nice to you. (probably a long way though) Plus I don't know how much he knows about your type of issues. (the selective mutism)

I was actually really surprised one time when he said he hadn't heard about blackouts during mania. Apart from that though he was a very nice guy. Smart and understanding. He is a psychologist - mid to late 60's, and used to be a scientist before he did his Phd in psychology.

The guy the other day was just a psychiatrist I thought I'd try. Mainly because he is cheap. (if I'm honest) He just charges the gap of 40 bucks, so gets about 250 or so. He was hopeless.

I think I'll probably go back to my old psychiatrists place - where all my files are. It just costs more but will maybe be worth it.

The thing is though shrinks will usually just want to give you medication - although maybe they would suggest therapy with a psychologist in your case. I hope so - because I don't think meds are good straight off.
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post #87 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-07-2019, 04:50 AM Thread Starter
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Yeah I thought that looked like what your Mum was wanting - it would be hard for you though.

And yeah, in a way I wish you could come and see Adrian (my last therapist) - he would at least be nice to you. (probably a long way though) Plus I don't know how much he knows about your type of issues. (the selective mutism)

I was actually really surprised one time when he said he hadn't heard about blackouts during mania. Apart from that though he was a very nice guy. Smart and understanding. He is a psychologist - mid to late 60's, and used to be a scientist before he did his Phd in psychology.

The guy the other day was just a psychiatrist I thought I'd try. Mainly because he is cheap. (if I'm honest) He just charges the gap of 40 bucks, so gets about 250 or so. He was hopeless.

I think I'll probably go back to my old psychiatrists place - where all my files are. It just costs more but will maybe be worth it.

The thing is though shrinks will usually just want to give you medication - although maybe they would suggest therapy with a psychologist in your case. I hope so - because I don't think meds are good straight off.
Everything I’ve read says it’s a good idea to do some things I’m scared of so I can see that nothing bad will happen, so even if it’s hard to, I want to try anyway. When I was in the supermarket, my mum asked me if I would like to try to get a job tidying the shelves and putting things on them, and I think that would be good. I do it so often when I’m there that she has to tell me to stop.

Adrian sounds like a nice therapist. It’s a bit too far from here, but I’ve seen that there are some who might be okay in Geelong, which is closer.

I think one of the reasons I didn’t like my last therapist was that she looked like my sister’s mother in law, who I didn’t like (none of us did). They were nice people, but I don’t think I was ready to get better then because I was too scared. I used to count how many days it was until I had to go back, and get nervous as it got closer.

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post #88 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-07-2019, 02:38 PM
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Everything Iíve read says itís a good idea to do some things Iím scared of so I can see that nothing bad will happen, so even if itís hard to, I want to try anyway. When I was in the supermarket, my mum asked me if I would like to try to get a job tidying the shelves and putting things on them, and I think that would be good. I do it so often when Iím there that she has to tell me to stop.

Adrian sounds like a nice therapist. Itís a bit too far from here, but Iíve seen that there are some who might be okay in Geelong, which is closer.

I think one of the reasons I didnít like my last therapist was that she looked like my sisterís mother in law, who I didnít like (none of us did). They were nice people, but I donít think I was ready to get better then because I was too scared. I used to count how many days it was until I had to go back, and get nervous as it got closer.
That's fantastic. I'm probably going to think of that when I go to the supermarket now when I see things a bit crooked.

I actually do that in bookshops all the time - I did it again yesterday without even realising it. When they have those piles of new books out in the middle of the shop in Dymocks - if someone's bumped them I have to straighten them up.
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post #89 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-14-2019, 07:35 PM Thread Starter
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I went into a shop by myself today and bought something, then said “thanks” to the person who served me. It wasn’t as bad as I thought. I felt like I was doing something wrong.

I had said a few words to my mum in the supermarket, but I was so quiet she didn’t notice until I told her when we were back in the car. When I was walking back to the car with my parents, I saw a little heater outside a shop, so I walked over to it to see if it was real or not. It was fake, but it was only $10, so I wanted it. My mum went back to the supermarket to get batteries for it and told my dad to go into the shop with me to buy the light, but he didn’t hear her tell him. I walked into the shop and kept waiting for him to follow me in, but he was standing outside and not paying attention, so I went in by myself.

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post #90 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-14-2019, 11:33 PM
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I went into a shop by myself today and bought something, then said ďthanksĒ to the person who served me. It wasnít as bad as I thought. I felt like I was doing something wrong.

I had said a few words to my mum in the supermarket, but I was so quiet she didnít notice until I told her when we were back in the car. When I was walking back to the car with my parents, I saw a little heater outside a shop, so I walked over to it to see if it was real or not. It was fake, but it was only $10, so I wanted it. My mum went back to the supermarket to get batteries for it and told my dad to go into the shop with me to buy the light, but he didnít hear her tell him. I walked into the shop and kept waiting for him to follow me in, but he was standing outside and not paying attention, so I went in by myself.
That's great you managed to do that.

Is it like a little pretend heater or something?
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post #91 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 12:26 AM Thread Starter
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That's great you managed to do that.



Is it like a little pretend heater or something?


Thanks. I can tell it will keep getting easier. My FitBit says my heart rate went up to 105 while I was in the shop.

This is what I bought:
 

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post #92 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 01:13 AM
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Flame effect vintage tv LED light, I never knew such a thing existed, you learn something new everyday 🙂






And all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way to dusty death
Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow,
A poor player that strut's and fret's his hour upon the stage and is heard no more,
It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
- Macbeth
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post #93 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 01:13 AM
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Thanks. I can tell it will keep getting easier. My FitBit says my heart rate went up to 105 while I was in the shop.

This is what I bought:
 
Oh that's great - hope it keeps getting easier for you.

I love that little thing - it's a little old telly! Very cute.
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post #94 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 03:19 AM
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I have an important interview on Monday and know very well that I am going to get extremely nervous, it is already starting to build up. But I got some advice from a colleague and I am going to try and prepare for the interview. I will make a list with bullets for what I am thinking of saying. I am going to try and speak more slowly and calmly in so far as this is possible for me. That is the positive thing - I will try to prepare and the feeling that I am prepare will help me to lessen my worriedness, hope very much
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post #95 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 09:24 AM
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Can going to a concert be considered as a success for someone who has anxiety?
Because I'm going to a festival in June and I'm ****ting myself but at least I will be with my boyfriend (not too fond of the idea of being alone around thousands of strangers). It will definitely be stressful and a challenge for my anxiety but will be worth it.

I did it! My anxiety started sky rocketing two days before leaving to the point I was having regular crying fits multiple times a day and I was feeling physically sick, everything went well and I quite enjoyed myself at the concert even though it was so tiring and I managed to enjoy a visit of the city the following day too. I'm really happy it's over but I got some good memories from the whole experience.

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post #96 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 09:03 PM
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Texted my dad happy father's day . We rarely talk.

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post #97 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 11:36 PM
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@Silent Memory

That is a cool thing you brought.
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post #98 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-17-2019, 07:43 AM
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post #99 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-30-2019, 08:25 AM
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!


I think I'm getting the hang of eye-contact. I was taking the Japanese approach to it before by avoiding direct eye-contact but it seems like I'm getting the hang of it.

ďThough I have always made it my practice to be pleasant to everybody, I have not once actually experienced friendship. I have only the most painful recollections of my various acquaintances ..."
― Osamu Dazai, No Longer Human
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post #100 of 129 (permalink) Old 06-30-2019, 09:20 AM
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I guess trying to speak to people and make friends was a big positive step for me. But it was on the internet, I'm not usually a chatty person. So I do feel good about making new friends on steam.

At some point, you have to realise that some people can stay in your heart but not in your life ...
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