Social Anxiety Forum

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-   Triumphs Over Social Anxiety (https://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f9/)
-   -   Nobody honestly judges... (https://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f9/nobody-honestly-judges-2227935/)

Pete55 10-14-2019 10:30 AM

Nobody honestly judges...
 
I think its clear the reason we all have SA is mainly because of extremely irrational automatic subconcious thoughts that are really hard to control,

for example: when u walk into mcdonalds, you immiedietly think "THEY COULD SEE MY ANXIETY" "THEY THINK THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME" "I WAS JUDGED 2 MONTHS AGO BY THIS PERSON, THEY ARE CONFIRMATION THAT THESE PEOPLE CAN SEE MY ANXIETY AND THINK IM WEIRD" and a hundred more thoughts and physical sensation bombarding your poor poor mind and body.

And I'll be honest, I've SEEN how i've looked anxious thanks to a security camera and tbh I DO look abnormal and weird.

But even so, I BARELY get judged when I leave my house, I may get glanced at a few times but glancing could be anything, its just a person with SA attributes small glances as judgements.

My parents once forced me to be a cashier at their fast food, and I was anxious and looking weird as hell (this was prob the prime of my SA and misery), and tbh only 5-6 out of 30-40 people judged me. And the only people's faces that I could remember were the 5-6 people (and they may not even have been judgements but a product of my sensitive mind)

CBT tells you nobody sees your anxiety, but in truth, some people's SA symptoms are visible but what CBT gets right is the fact that nobody really cares. Yes some people will judge you (everyone gets judged for some reason or another) but the *MAJORITY* of people could care less.

I think my physical sensations are the worst and most uncomfortable (and visible) of all physical sensations of SA, and people don't even judge me, so what r the chances they will judge you?

Another thing I do nowadays is I just talk in class, if people laugh at me for talking (TRYING), so be it. It's better to get laughed at for trying then for not trying in my opinion.

I want all of you to Social Anxiety self help book by Martin Antony, i'm 95 percent sure it will get rid of most of ur SA's

Noca 10-29-2019 10:51 AM

I find adopting a IDGAF attitude along with some rationalizing helps. I haven't seen this person before, I likely won't see them again so what does it matter? I mean even if I will see this person again, as long as I don't have to work with this person, then I don't care if they like me. Yes I will stutter, stumble over my words and may make a fool of myself but oh well, IDGAF. It helps insulate me from the vulnerability of anxiety.

For people that I need to like me, well simply doing exposure therapy will decrease the anxiety over time, but I don't really encounter that scenario all that often because I already have friends who accept me.

twitchy666 10-29-2019 11:06 AM

Layers of blame!
 
along long chain of who starts..... and ends the process


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