My very small victories since 2011
I once read somewhere that one of the best therapeutic things you can do, especially if you're a child, is to list the things you're thankful for and acknowledge the things that you've accomplished no matter how small or trivial it may seem.
I just read my very first post on this forum. It was in 2011, the beginning of my senior year in high school, and I was questioning whether I had extreme shyness or social anxieties. The year before that, I almost dropped out because my anxieties became too unbearable despite earning As and Bs in school.
I took a long hiatus from this forum, returned once to talk about my anxieties about my high school graduation ceremony.
I took another long hiatus until I hit college where I struggled a lot. That's when I spent a lot more time here. It was in 2013.
During this time in 2013, I had a mental breakdown simply because I would have to take the bus myself to school. While it was far away, it would have only taken one bus trip to college and yet I was so fearful that I cried for days. I ultimately never took the bus and transferred to another university.
I didn't get my driver's license until I was in 2015. I was 21. I got the permits on my first try, and passed the test on my first try! So proud. I haven't driven since, but at least I have my ID and I can pick up driving when I absolutely need it in the future.
In 2017, I had to take a last minute CLEP exam to get one last credit and scored a 63 (56 to pass), got the credit, and graduated college. I officially graduated December 2017. Wish I had tried the CLEP exams earlier to save time and money (tip to all of you current high schoolers and college students!).
I finally took the bus for the first time in May 2018. I got lost, but I made it home. And now I have that experience under my belt. I got my bus card this month.
I didn't get a job until just last week at 24. Although I'm struggling a lot with anxieties, and I'm only currently in training, and I honestly don't know what the future holds for me at this place, at least I did well at the interview and was offered the job over others who were interviewed.
Many of these things don't seem like a big deal. In fact, many high schoolers may have already accomplished these things (driver's license, first job, taking the bus).
But I'm still thankful. I've gone through it and I survived it and now I'm going to survive my current situation and my next chapter even if there will be a lot of struggles. I'm still scared, and I'm probably going to lose sleep tonight thinking about work tomorrow, but at least I'm experiencing it now.
My ultimate (realistic) goal is to be healthier, go back to being a vegan for ethical reasons, buy a car and drive, improve credit score, buy a home, take care of my mom, and work for myself as an artist and graphic/web designer.
I hope I can make another post in the years to come to tell you about accomplishing those things.