My First Dance With a Girl
This happened awhile back, in 1995/96, but I thought I'd share it here because it was a huge step for me at the time.
Her name was Veronica, we were in 7th Grade and the school dance was happening that day. For our middle school, the dance was a casual event that was held in the lunchroom after school. They just folded the tables up and moved them up against the wall, and they just left a few chairs on the other side to sit on. You could dress up if you wanted, but it was easier to go just as you are. Some people would go home and get changed, most of us just headed over directly after class. I had my Tazmanian devil t-shirt, and sweatpants.
Veronica was in two of my classes, English and Homeroom, so I knew her fairly well. I never had a crush on her or anything, but I thought she was cool. She was one of the tomboy dorky girls who never wore skirts, hated wearing makeup, and kept a close-knit group of friends so she wasn't outgoing. She was in Orchestra, and played Soccer which she quit in 8th grade. Her hair was short, only slightly longer than a pixie cut.
I was at the dance by myself, just roaming around the dance floor watching people, not dancing much myself unless it was a song I knew.
I saw Veronica sitting in one of the chairs, her friend sitting beside her, she had her purple quilted jacket on, and she was crying. I should say that my biggest weakness is seeing a girl cry, it stirs up feeling in me and I want to be able to help them. I had never seen Veronica cry before. She had always been making jokes
in homeroom and laughing at them awkwardly. She didn't seem the type to let anything get to her.
I did walk around at first, but I went back to look at her again. I wanted to talk to her, but my anxiety was really active now. It was actually when her friend noticed me standing there that I just walked over to them. I held out a hand (as we were taught to do in dance class) and asked Veronica if she wanted to dance. Already, I was waiting for her to say no, to yell at me, to get mad. I always expect that kind of reaction.
Her friend had a big smile on her face and she nudged Veronica with her hand. When Veronica noticed me, she still had tears coming out of her eyes and down her cheeks, but she accepted. I don't recall the exact exchange now, but it was something like:
Veronica: "I'm crying."
Me: "It's okay, you can cry."
Her face was buried in my shoulder and we swayed to the music. She was still kind of sobbing, I remember. Neither of us talked much. By the time the song ended she had stopped crying (minus a few sniffles here and there)
We stuck together the rest of the dance, I had to leave early, but she thanked me and gave me a hug. Her friend said thanks, too.
I found out later that she was bullied by some girls in class before going to the dance, and she wasn't even wanting to come afterwards but her friend made her. That's why she had her jacket on, she was preparing to leave.
So I dunno, maybe I made her night?
I did draw a heart around her yearbook picture.