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rozelle 08-30-2017 02:29 AM

I've taken a baby step in social interaction
Yesterday was the only day where I had the courage to finally talk to one of my classmates. I guess I did it because for the entire week we would have no classes whatsoever due to multiple holidays compressed into one week, and I wouldn't have to see their faces for another five days. Anyway, for the whole afternoon me and my other classmates who are in the props committee were making props outside the classroom. I didn't talk much, and even got refused by my classmate when I asked her to accompany me (so much for trying too hard not to look like a loner...). A few fours later, an acquaintance of mine passed by our classroom. She and I talked for awhile. Then she asked me to join her in walking around the school. By this time the props committee weren't doing anything, the others were inside talking with their friends, while the others just sat outside. I agreed. We occasionally bumped into some of our other friends, and it was during this time that I confessed that I never walked around the school during class hours. She laughed and said I should spend my last year in high school enjoying and trying out new things. Then I went back to my classroom because her other friend came to talk to her and I didn't want to be a third-wheel there.
A few more minutes before dismissal, this girl and I were the last ones outside cleaning up. Maybe because it was of the fact that I finally had a normal conversation with a friend, or something else, that my confidence slightly went up and decided to go and initiate small talk. I asked her what class she was in before, then she asked me how I got acquainted with my friend (the one I walked around school with), and it went on for about another more minute until we were done with cleaning and went back inside. Thus ended our small talk. :D
It sounds petty to think that this was a victory in terms of SA, but for me it truly is. School started since a month ago and I still have no friends inside my class, but as of right now all I could think about was how happy it made me feel when I finally had the courage to talk to someone I'm not close to.

Thanks in advance for anyone who felt the need to read this little triumph of mine. :)

Alleviate Suffering 08-30-2017 07:20 AM

I don't think it's petty. To win the war against Social Anxiety you have to win lots of little battles first.

Well done and maybe try and push yourself to have little conversations like that every day.

rozelle 08-31-2017 12:17 AM

Yep, it definitely feels a lot better whenever I do something I normally wouldn't, even if my classmates think I'm trying too hard. Thank you for your response, I appreciate it!

Fluttershy9099 10-11-2017 10:05 PM

AH! as a newbie i was a bit hesitant to reply but as someone who has been dealing with social anxiety since childhood this year i too have been proactively working to deal with and take charge of my healing process. I'm thinking of returning back to school and in the meanwhile i'm going to two volunteer jobs and juggling a low paying care taker job. it took over 5 years for me to gather the courage to get to this point. While I'm nowhere where I truly want to be its a start.

goldenratio 10-11-2017 10:17 PM

rozelle I think you did a great job starting small talk with that girl. It's not petty at all. Every little thing you do counts in the long run towards overcoming SA. Remember: you can smile at others too. A smile is worth more than a thousand words to others who need it.

thebenevolentmobsterjolly 11-01-2017 01:12 PM

my man!

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