I'm somewhat embarrassed to really say it, but I can't really contain myself. Plus no one'll listen to me, so I figured why not share it here?
Lately I've been talking with this girl on the internet. We met about a year back due to us having similar interests and because she likes my anime-ish drawings. Although we've sort of gotten closer and we've gotten to know each other better. We've been talking more, learning about each other, and I really enjoy talking to her. Yet I get sad whenever she has to leave. Silly time differences between countires. >_>
Anyways, well today was sort of the same between us when she was called off to go water the plants. So she left me for a little bit, but told me she'd be back and she was. She then told me how she got water all over her, and especially because she had sandals on. I was thinking like "oh, no, are you okay?" and I even asked her that. She was saying she was fine except that her legs were cold and I told her to stay warm and whatever.
Then she actually told me I was sweet... I couldn't help but blush when I read what she said. She added she wasn't used to anyone being all concerned about her, and added I was making her blush as well. I wasn't used to a girl actually calling me sweet and acknowledging my love and compassion.
Before, when I used to be all nice to every girl I met, they'd treat me like a door mat and take advantage of my kindness. I'd be willing to bend over backwards to help them, and they wouldn't see that. Like one girl, I helped study so she wouldn't fail a geology class. She thanked me and said I was caring. She doesn't talk to me anymore and she's dating some guy who I know nothing about. I hate being used like that. It's really no wonder why I'm almost afraid to really open up to a girl and actually show I care about her.
Well, without being aware, I showed my feelings of concern and care for her and she liked that. When I told her why I wasn't used to being called that, she sort of felt bad, and I sort of felt bad that none of her real life friends care about her that way... We went on talking about how much w enjoy talking to each other and whatever. We were talking past what was 2 AM her time... I mean wow! It was evening for me, like 6/7 PM, so no difference, but wow... I had a very good day. I even told her it made my day talking to her. Apparently I made her blush more.
Of course we are just friends, but I mean if one girl can see the good in me, maybe it's possible other girls can see the good in me, too. And perhaps maybe they will see something more in me, and want to date me...
Oh my gosh, I'm sorry, I'm feeling all light all of a sudden.
"No, I didn't see you playing with your dolls again!"