I watched The Social Dilemma and it's real good! It seems I can control my dopamine pathways well because I don't give in to the pressure of posting selfies anymore. But while taking Prozac, I was addicted to taking too much selfies, I was addicted to shallow things like clothes and shopping sprees, validation, status like getting into relationships. It's strange how I want to reach the finish line to get rewarded with dopamine but now I don't want it. Yay me!
But it's still hard when people don't like my photos and I don't like theirs. In The Social Dilemma on Netflix, you can see how traumatic it is when other people's opinions about you in the form of *likes* changes who you are. Like you can't be yourself and get zero likes, you change to get likes. ****ing sick. But that's how bad antidepressants are for you as well, they make you fit in and everybody loves you. Gross. There's probably something going on without antidepressants and my dopamine, I innately do not want to be pressured to take selfies and compete for likes, but my sister sure does.
Well the truth is, I am jealous of other people and mostly of my sister, all thanks to ****ing facebook. But I don't want to let my ****ing jealousy which is only a chemical imbalance of not enough dopamine rewards from facebook, obviously. I like social media from a psychologist point of view like social interactions and people's brains. I like dating sites for the same point. It's cool to think about and at the same time not let it get you down, like when you see behind the way it works, you wake up a little and snap out of it. It's a magical moment like how Eckhart Tolle snapped himself out of his depression sufferings.
I like to see people's social media personality and even worse - when you also know them in real life but their social media is so different or even better. Ah so cool, like some people are more active in real life than on social media and vice versa, I guess that can show how introvert or extrovert they are. Oh and you can also form your own secret opinions about them and find out what mental disorders they have. That's one of my main things I can't stop doing to people, diagnose them, especially ex's. And friends.... And myself. Ooh I should be a psychiatrist that doesn't give out drugs because we all know only people with Antisocial Personality Disorder give out drugs in their psychiatry careers. Looks like Peter Breggin is not one.
And then you can overcome some of your outcast and not fitting in and not getting so much likes as other people who compete for likes. And then you can start creating yourself the way you want to be not the way facebook or other social medias want you to be. The Social Dilemma shows you how social media creates the way you are the way they want you to be. It's like brainwashing. It's kind of rare to be yourself, without any attachments to social media opinions and other people's opinions. Ugh overall, social media and people opinions are ****ing traumatic, just another trauma I don't need.
Well all of life is like this. How nice it is to be original and be under the Autism spectrum and not fit in but to be able to create your own self, stand true to yourself and what you want to share with people, how you want to look, what you value in life without brainwashing opinions from social medias and other people. It's rare and hard to be this way, but I'm glad people like this exist, even when they are given antidepressant that take over their brain chemicals and make them take on a different persona altogether which tries to take over their lives and make them fit in social media culture. But they can try, the only thing that matters is taking life into your own hands and seeing the ****ing truth and not being afraid of it.