Avoid subconsciously avoiding - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-18-2008, 03:08 PM Thread Starter
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: Tampa, Fl
Gender: Male
Posts: 224

Avoid subconsciously avoiding


After reading some book I picked up a while back that I've only perused, something stuck with me. "Subconscious avoidance". For about the past month I've thought about this more and it finally started clicking, and I would do certain habits that would fuel my social anxiety.

Some of these included: When at a red light, stop so that I wasn't aligned with the car next to me to avoid the feeling of that person staring at me, taking a different path on a sidewalk on my way to class if someone was handing out a survey or there was a large group of people, looking down at the floor when I pass by someone, just to avoid eye contact.

Putting a stop to these avoidance behaviors has definitely improved by confidence and the slight shaking I would get when I felt like I was being watched.

Today I put another one to rest. People at my school usually hand out little brochures on where to find work, or maybe a local paper. And even if I didn't want it, I would just accept it to avoid saying no. As I was walking up, I just told myself to say no thanks for a change. I didn't want it, so it didn't make sense just to accept it. And that's exactly what I did. I see people all the time just accept whatever the person is handing out just to throw it away at the nearest garbage can. It may seem insignificant, but I'm sure in the long run it'll pay off. You got to start somewhere.
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-18-2008, 06:00 PM
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 85

Re: Avoid subconsciously avoiding


great!! I definitely cansee myself acting out a lot of those same subconscious avoidance patterns. It's good to hear that you're feeling more confident as you work to reverse them. I feel like I set myself up to be even more anxious when I make those elaborate plans to avoid people...i'll try this too, it would make me feel way more adjusted if I didn't let myself waste energy just trying to stay out of the way.
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 02-27-2008, 07:58 AM
 
Join Date: Apr 2005
Posts: 257

Re: Avoid subconsciously avoiding


You're still displaying avoidance behavior (j/k). Good work!
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