Be careful please
OOOOOOOOOOoooooooooooooK.....The group.....Im going to be completly honest....
Simualar to Stanley Joe and Herewithyou ive also had a taste of the real Phil except mine was over the phone.
I waited a while so that I would be sure not to give info that was based off bias or rather scewd SA views on the situation.its been a few months since my experience ,and ive healed alot more since then,and dont believe its bias. ill just tell my story and state some simple facts.
First notice the dates ranging back to early 2010 and MobiusX is right they dont allow us to give info and the reason they say they dont is because of these people thats supposedly in NY. but if u call in tonight the times Phil gives now clearly dont add up or match up seeing Phil says this started last summer,yet on this page it can be observed that early 2011 information wasnt allowed,and it can be seen that Sanley Joe was actually calling in when these lies were being told and wasnt seeing this.
My experience is this...when I started calling around last oct. it was something I would have suggested to any one.Reading the literature and I thought it was a shame these ppl from New York messed it up so that we couldnt support each other better.It was alot of silence and Im not special,because I was able to share;its the way it came together.Id been doing therapy for years,and was starting to see good results,had a biiiiig relapse which landed me in the hospital for about a week .....After coming out there was another big breakthrough and I was about to explode and really needed to let some stuff out .
When I shared for the first few weeks it was still silent but others would share at times and it was increasing.Phil the owner/moderator which at the time I had nothing but respect for,and still would if it wasnt for what hes doing;took a interest in me and talked to me afterward(so I thought was for support).
Early talks with Phil did concern me that he made small of other ppls inability to share in joking ways and talked about the support group like it was a business,but the whole thing was all very new to me and I thought it may have been my imagination at first.
also Yes he sets a hostile tone to the group and very suddly does things to make others feel bad about themselves,but again I didnt know if it was just my SA paranoia or real.
He asked me on a thur. meeting if I would talk to him after mondays meeting about the ppl or rather his boogy man now I know in New York that was harrasing them and ways I could help even and I was all for it.
When we arrived at the conversation and I mean as soon....
now I want to be very clear when I say no exagerration.....
As SOON as the last person hung up his entire tone with me changed and he said he didnt know if he wanted to talk to me any more.Then said wait....
we waited....
waited.....
while he decided if he still wanted to talk to me.
Now this process is and anxiety causing one any way,but especially for a person with SA,and the thing is I was very blessed because the cog/behavoral therapy was able to be utilized and in that process a surreal breakthrough happen,and though I was anxious I could clearly percieve at this piont.
A few things that was recognized was tecniques Ive seen thats only come from therapist or ppl ive known thats had education in psyc
ology,and I could see that what was going on didnt make since.
when he decided to talk too me; he began to get me straight about taking pop shots at him in the group, and said that hes not wrong about these things, and told me I had a problem with athority figures.So I said to him the truth .that I wasnt taking pop shots and wanted to know what he meant, and also let him know that I didnt think of him as a authority figure but a organizer ,and asked him if thats why he was upset.He didnt answer the question by using more phycological tecniques that was recognized,but he did let me know at that time that he started the phone service.
which I didnt know,and all before that I just knew him to be one of the moderators.After that he shifted gears and started asking me alot of questions really quick about myself that was very personal, and I answered his questions; which literally would have been a process of breaking me down mentally seeing as his questions started from when I was a kid til current times, and were with precision:yet even though I was seeing clearer it still didnt make since he would be doing what it looked like he was doing,but yet it was taking place.
Then he switched gears and began talking to me civil,so we talked more and thats when I found out he did web promotion ,and that he had complete control over the phone line,and later I found out he knows how to get grants which is a skill thats not known in vain.
I know because its something at one time I was interested in.
After that talk I was on the phone as people would get cut off,also would hear him night after night tell lies about the phone service that I knew he had complete control over ,because after that conversation we had which lasted for hours he asked me if we could talk on a night when there was no meeting going on and meet in the phone line.
It took a few weeks of hearing him lie. Then see that he didnt like when people shared ,and would subliminally say things to intimedate ppl from sharing ,and also seen people that had started sharing and was doing well;mysteriously stop calling more than once.
Then there would be people that called in ,and every thing would begin to sound scripted,and it would also intimedate ppl from sharing,because even if ur healing from this condition its certain things no matter where ur at on the spectrum thats challenging.
ppl would call in for one or two phone calls about 3 to 5 at a time speaking very clear confident and scripted sounding talking with him.
Then they all at once would stop calling in groups;which also happened multiple times.
Then I had been sharing and he would do tricks with the phone line that I know he could do because he makes it no secret he controls the whole thing from a computer, and these quick distractions would make me forget what I was saying.
I feel I was very blessed because the cog/behavoral therapy would help,but things would just come back to mind, and after while he would have spells of mysteriously not coming back to the phone after these things would happen.
Then After weeks of observing all of what I knew to be untruths told.As well as all the suspicious behavior.
it became clear to me that if this place was what they said they were its excellent,but its not.Its not a real support group.
I then started looking at everything and realizing all the inconsistencies 4instance;
the place supposedly was around for ten years,yet I couldnt find it till recently.and il admit I had stopped looking for a while since about 2010,but then it occured to me that in 2010 there was a place that had the exact same graphics on there website as there current graphics to the t.
I had started calling the other group about mar. 2010,but it was for regular anxiety not SA,so thats why I stopped,but I looked for these ppl on the net and no longer could find them,or any one:
except his group;and alot of web marketing;in the form of false blogs that I recognized ,and dont take my word 4 it.Check out what web marketing is.
it can involves acting like ur writing a ginuine blog but really advertising ur product;and the reason they can be spotted easier than a regular blog or forum afterwhile is the way there worded.
its no direct piont only advertisement, and information ;to ...advertise.
So then I thought about it and lets say its legitamate and for some reason it just didnt show up in my area or something still that dont explain after ten years why the groups so small.
Then he speaks of a board of senoir members that come from local groups ,and the phone groups secondary,but on his website it says local groups can be started by any one, and they simply advertise .....;Sooooo how on earth is there a board of senior members from local groups that he only advertises for.
Also lets say it is;how is it a person suffering from SA truthfully to the level he says he is recovering or rather has recovered 85% from get around to all these differnt places to meet and greet these people to even build a trust to franchise a support group through different states.
Also they make decisions on whats what????whats best for the treatment of the people with SA that call.
OK if therapist and Dr.s that are trained barely help,and they have training;how on earth is a group of volunteers going to do what trained therapist rarely can.Also again according to the website all they do is advertise for local groups.I apologize about the length but the best thing I can do is tell my experience in hopes to help others....
cont on another entry
Last edited by Reem majors; 05-01-2013 at 09:35 PM.
Reason: spelling,punctuation,paragraphing,and to add a few words