Originally Posted by caughtinthematrix
Does anyone else feel worse after there sessions, Knowing that in the group your the only one who cant contribute anything and feel out of place.
I can see where you are coming from.
I made the 'mistake', of trying to toastmasters meetings (public speaking groups) to meet my fear head on. I thought if I just forced myself to do public speaking over, and over again I'd get past this thing.
However, the result was that my anxiety was ratcheted up to 11, for the meetings, and if anything it re-enforced my fears. Now, I'm thinking a 'smarter' way of approaching this problem would be to first dis-associate the fear with social situations in the first place.
I mean, lets say someone is scared of drowning due to the fact they can't swim. Would the correct course of action be to just throw them in the water over and over? Hell no. They'd continually sink, and have their fears completely re-enforced. First you have to teach that person to swim, and then when they start going in the water they will realize it's a situation they can handle, and the fear will stop.
I'm sorry to ramble a bit OT on your point. I wish I had an answer for you, but just wanted to say that I know where you are coming from. I think you have to get to the point of being able to participate in the group in a way where your fears are not coming to fruition, and that may help to change the way you analyze social situations, but I'm not sure the answer to get there.