Have People Been Leaving SAS for Reddit? - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 08:28 AM Thread Starter
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Have People Been Leaving SAS for Reddit?


I'm not sure what section of this site I should post/ask this question. Recently I heard from another member that people who leave SAS go to Reddit. Is that true?

The reason why I decided to put this in the "Frustration" section: Back when I was trying to get a girl friend online. It was in the early days of Social Media. Myspace had just come on the scene. I was busy experimenting with Chatrooms, Instant Messaging programs, Forums, Yahoo Groups, Dating Sites, and then I found myself on Myspace. Quiting Myspace, and moving over to a Christian version of Myspace. In an attempt to get away from all the annoying and tempting junk that Myspace had on it. The girls I met and "sorta" befriended, were constantly on the move. They had hopped from one Instant Messaging program to another. One Social Media Site to another. Every time they would sign up I'd receive an email from the site, inviting me to join yet another site. As you can imagine it was frustrating managing all those accounts. I never knew where I belonged. As soon as I felt planted, the people I thought I was clicking with, would go silent, and then I would discover them on yet another site. I lost track of how many times I rejoined Myspace just cause everyone had an account there. And everytime I joined I would get annoyed by the same crap I got annoyed with before. One could say "The Monkey Never Learns" but that would be a wrong statement. The Monkey did learn. The Monkey knew that He needed to be where the other Monkeys are. It's just that He had emotional trouble with the place the other Monkey's chose to be. Of course eventually Facebook, or as some of us call it. "Fakebook" came on the scene and got popular. Sure enough I got pulled into it too. In the beginning my feelings about Fakebook were the same as Myspace. It frustrated me, I joined and left, and joined and left, at least 3 times before I settled in. After I settled in, the issues there drove in me into depression. I didn't have the tolerance to handle it. It was after dealing with Fakebook that I decided to do a google search for people who posted about having some of the same troubles I was having. That lead me here to this site.

Now days I don't even try anymore. 1) I'm getting too old. 2) I recognize that everyone I have ever met in real life doesn't click with me. 3) Everyone I meet online lives too far away and they don't click with me, and they are too young.

Mod note - Regardless of why you posted this in the Frustration section, it still does not belong in the Frustration section. Therefore, it has been moved to Board Help and Feedback ~WYSD
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post #2 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 11:34 AM
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If SASers are leaving here for Reddit, I sure didn't run into them in any droves. Then again I probably didn't browse the "right" subs.

All I can tell you is if MySpace and Facebook triggered your depression, Reddit will REALLY do a number on you. Last chatty/friendly comment I tried to make, along the same lines as several other comments, got a swift downvote. (Nobody else did, just me.) That happened to me all the time, no matter what the sub or subject matter; it was either that or just get completely ignored--if I wasn't getting downvoted for no reason, then I always seemed to be joining the conversation RIGHT after everyone else abandoned it. Didn't matter if it had been posted 24 hours ago or six. Even the two times I made art for other users there, they replied to everybody else but me. The subs for lonely and "foreveralone" people are the worst (aside from incel subs, I guess). My God what horrible, horrible, judgy people. Get ready to be ridiculed and rejected even by "your own kind," it's a particularly painful kind of rejection. You may even get private messages jeering at you.

Maybe you'd have slightly better luck because you're a guy. (They won't bother accepting a woman like me in the least, no matter how lonely I am and no matter how much they say they wish they could find a lonely woman, but even if guys are accepted, they'll still judge you harshly if you've gone on so much as one date or even had a friend who happened to be a woman...just the fact that you're still trying to make a connection is bad, they jeer at anyone who has a shred of hope left and doesn't completely hate the opposite gender. It's literally the Misery Olympics, and everyone believes they are the worst off.) Dunno. Still depressing and judgemental as hell; I was even rejected in women's subreddits, no explanation. Several times over I've had to remind myself there's no use in me trying even the smallest, most inoffensive socializing there, even in non-FA/lonely subs. Some a-hole will downvote me just for fun and send me into yet another bout of depression and self-loathing.

(And don't dare ask why you were downvoted unless you want ten more.)

Oh. And you have to put a "Tl;dr" after everything or they'll downvote you for that, too, apparently.

If I don't reply to you, it's NOTHING PERSONAL. It's my ANXIETY.

***

(Devetko's boyfriend Stan Brooks & Det. Reichert are horsing around.)

Det. Kristeva: "If it were legal you'd marry me, right?"
Det. Devetko: "Definitely."

(It's legal now!! But Kristeva's already married. ;_; )

***

"No canoes...no maple sugar...this place is horribly uncivilized."--Manabozho, Escape From Manitou Island
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post #3 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 11:42 AM
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I dont really post on reddit. I dont think anyone there gives a **** about the minutiae of my life

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post #4 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 12:45 PM
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Possibly. Reddit is famous, and forums are old-school now. Forums won't even show up on search results anymore....but for me, Reddit isnt a good place. People aren't nice, welcoming or sensitive about other ppl's feelings on there.


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post #5 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 01:10 PM
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Everyone is on Reddit! (Even news organizations and federal government agencies). It's the Internet's largest forum. There's something for everyone.

My experience has been largely positive there, and I even met some users in real life.

/r/TwoXChromosomes is one of the gentler, more supportive subs. /r/AskReddit has some good reads!
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post #6 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 01:27 PM
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I read reddit all the time but only very rarely post on it.
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post #7 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 01:39 PM
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I look at Reddit but I find it kind of dry. Sometimes it's "millennial-ness" is just too much for me and I need a break.
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post #8 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 01:47 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by leaf in the wind View Post
/r/TwoXChromosomes is one of the gentler, more supportive subs.
That was the one where I posted a heartfelt comment agreeing/commiserating with someone else's highly upvoted comment and then my comment, and half the others in the thread, got deleted without explanation/reason. That was my very first (and only) interaction in that sub. I didn't break any rules or anything, as far as I know I haven't even posted in any of the "problem" subs that can get one shadow-banned there. I thought it looked like a nice sub, too.

If I don't reply to you, it's NOTHING PERSONAL. It's my ANXIETY.

***

(Devetko's boyfriend Stan Brooks & Det. Reichert are horsing around.)

Det. Kristeva: "If it were legal you'd marry me, right?"
Det. Devetko: "Definitely."

(It's legal now!! But Kristeva's already married. ;_; )

***

"No canoes...no maple sugar...this place is horribly uncivilized."--Manabozho, Escape From Manitou Island
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post #9 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 02:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by tehuti88 View Post
That was the one where I posted a heartfelt comment agreeing/commiserating with someone else's highly upvoted comment and then my comment, and half the others in the thread, got deleted without explanation/reason. That was my very first (and only) interaction in that sub. I didn't break any rules or anything, as far as I know I haven't even posted in any of the "problem" subs that can get one shadow-banned there. I thought it looked like a nice sub, too.
If a lot of others had their comments removed too, I wouldn't take it personally.
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post #10 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 02:39 PM
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I wish this forum had gotten some updates. I wish it especially updated the chat and added a listener system as well. Unfortunately at this rate this forum will cease to exist as there are just much better alternatives out there.
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post #11 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 02:40 PM
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I relate with most of the sentiments here. I don't usually mind lurking Reddit for advice and content, although in general I don't want to participate in its community. It's not for me.

As for your question, I haven't heard that anywhere. If there was some exodus of this place for Reddit I've never caught wind. Reddit is either the same, better, or worse depending on what sub you go to. It's hard to gauge since there's a ton of communities with varying numbers of users/activity/rules etc.

If you're worried about something similar happening on this site, I don't see it happening. There's a handful of decent communities like this one. I think it would take something revolutionary to get a bunch of people to up and leave if the site is doing them good or they like it here.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Ominous Indeed View Post
Isn't it a bit early to worry about that at 7 years old?
Quote:
Originally Posted by Chevy396 View Post
I don't believe you at all about the taste. You are vegan anyway, so how would you know what meat tastes like. I get sick of vegans saying it tastes the same and then you bite into it and it's horrible.
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post #12 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 02:47 PM
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Don't know, people can leave places for alot of reasons god knows what's going on in people's lives, many possibilities, I browsed stuff on reddit a few times, its been ok at times for particular subjects I was looking for information on but I didn't particularly like it.






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Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow,
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It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
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post #13 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 02:49 PM
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Reddit really personifies the toxicity you can find on the internet. Namely, that people can treat each other like garbage without any sense of accountability or remorse. Reddit makes everyone look like words on a screen. It lacks community for a couple of reasons:

-No icons so it's very difficult to get to know a poster
- Anonymous upvotes/downvotes which contribute to a hivemind and bury anything controversial. When someone starts to get downvoted, people love to pile on to mass downvote. And vice versa with upvotes.
-Because of the upvote system, some 'witty' comment is usually the first to display. Everyone competes to try to outwit each other, and then you get these long chains of increasingly unfunny 'witty' comments.
-Conversations die within 24 hours, so there's no history or backstory to a conversation. Every conversation is built from the ground up.

All that contributes to an impersonalization of individual users, which leads to people being toxic towards each other. The only positive I see in reddit is how wonderfully set up it is to find your particular community of interest.
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post #14 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 06:48 PM
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Reddit certainly leaves a lot to be desired. I don't post on that platform much at all because I just get this emptying gnawing feeling that everything posted there is merely for obtaining attention. Even the stuff that is mean't to be "wholesome" or "informative", people there actually edit their comments if they receive thousands of upvotes and say stuff like "OMG thanks for all of the upvotes". We live in a world where upvotes matter intrinsically to a lot of people, I just can't fathom that. There is just always this aura of people merely wanting to achieve some sort of popularity which has persisted ever since social media became widely accepted.

I don't post much here anymore because as much as we all have our own issues, we obviously display similar tendencies to the general populace with regards to socialization. One, this site isn't nearly as active as it once was. Two, out of the people who do post here, many have already formed their preferred groups much like folks IRL so it is hard to break into that if one has not ingratiated themselves.

Perhaps i'm just being salty. I don't know.

We haven't lived in anything remotely close to "real" since the turn of the century.
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post #15 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 07:48 PM
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Completely different. Information questions on reddit because high volume there's bound to be someone with knowledge, and generally incorrect stuff won't get highly upvoted. But if you want conversations and personal interactions you're much better off on a regular forum.
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post #16 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 08:31 PM Thread Starter
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I'm still really curious where people go when they stop posting on here. Years ago, I left here, and I tried various other Social Anxiety sites. What I learned from that experience is SAS is the most active. That's why I came back.

There were some other forums that I tested out, that I didn't think were very good. I have a learning disability so I thought I might fit in well with the ADD or ADHD forums. I didn't fit in because they really push therapy and medications. If for some reason your not doing those things, there doesn't seem to be much else to talk about. They don't allow you to talk politics or religion. I learned that the hard way. Anyone who follows me around knows that religion is a big influence on me, so it's important to me to talk about it sometimes. I also looked at a depression forum. I feel that SAS does a better job of including a little of everything without going over board. I was a member of Reddit, and I took lots of time looking the place over. What I found is that the site is too extreme for me. It's like an Internet within the Internet. If I was a Reddit user, then I would feel like blocking some of the site. Just to keep me out of the junk.
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post #17 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 09:10 PM
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Maybe when people stop posting here they do like I do when I stopped posting for a year and just sit in their rooms and cry alone at night.

I came back because nowhere else wants me either.

If I don't reply to you, it's NOTHING PERSONAL. It's my ANXIETY.

***

(Devetko's boyfriend Stan Brooks & Det. Reichert are horsing around.)

Det. Kristeva: "If it were legal you'd marry me, right?"
Det. Devetko: "Definitely."

(It's legal now!! But Kristeva's already married. ;_; )

***

"No canoes...no maple sugar...this place is horribly uncivilized."--Manabozho, Escape From Manitou Island
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post #18 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 09:46 PM
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Reddit, to me, is a strange place. Upvoted comments tend to have a similar tone, one that is upbeat, flippant, and confident--almost as if they were all written by the same person.

I've made some comments that have gotten upvoted, but a couple political ones that have gotten downvoted. One of them, where I simply said that no one should have as much money as Jeff Bezos, got something like -150 karma, lol. Whenever that happens I can't help but feel sad, partly because it feels like an attack, and partly because I don't understand how so many more people disagree than agree (even though I know I'm a lot more liberal than the average American).

It makes it so I'm scared to be truly myself.

Reddit brings out this herd mentality where people dogpile on comments in the form of positive or negative votes. I find it sort of troubling that it's so popular. But I myself have trouble staying away from the site because there's so much content.

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post #19 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-24-2020, 10:08 PM
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The whole internet is now pretty much a dumpster fire.
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post #20 of 55 (permalink) Old 05-25-2020, 08:58 AM Thread Starter
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I don't think up and down voting people's posts is good for anything. It doesn't tell you anything. Just because a bunch of people don't like what was said, doesn't make what was said, true of false. All it means is it's either popular or not popular.
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