Why are people mean to ugly people - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
Reply
 
Thread Tools
post #21 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-20-2015, 11:49 PM
Permanently Banned
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: California OC
Gender: Male
Age: 25
Posts: 7,291
Post pic so we can tell you how to become hot.
Imbored21 is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #22 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 07:17 AM
SAS Member
 
skyisblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Kansas
Gender: Male
Age: 35
Posts: 576
Quote:
Originally Posted by river13 View Post
No I won't send a picture. I just don't see the point in continuing to live then. I'm not going to get married, I'm not going to have kids, I'm not going to be happy doing things because people treat me badly. Why continue?
Whoa now, I have to jump in on this one.

I for one have no plans in getting married, and probably never will get married.

Probably will never have kids either.

This is what I don't get.....so you think your life isn't worth living if you don't have marriage or children ever?

It seems your frustration is more about "being socially in style" more than anything. Which by the way, is not a healthy way of living.

Trying to be "normal" is not the way to live life.

If you think you need marriage and kids to be happy, then that's a huge problem right there, because it means you can't not have those things and be happy.

You keep bringing up your sister.....it shouldn't bother you so much what she looks like.

Have you ever tried being happy for her instead of being jealous for her?

The biggest thing you should do is take a step back and stop caring what anyone thinks of you for a while. Learn to live your life on your terms, not other peoples' opinions.

I know you are probably going to disregard everything i said, but I advise you think about it.

You don't need beauty, marriage and children to be happy in this world.

Those three things are just things that society wants people to have.

Stop living for society and start pleasing yourself.
skyisblue is offline  
post #23 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 08:06 AM
Mr Bean Stig Soldier
 
twitchy666's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Berkshire
Language: ASCII, T-SQL
Gender: Male
Age: 43
Posts: 8,055
My Mood: Angry

But really horrible people are nasty to good looking people too


give up day

TV keeps stopping working. Has years ago
Keeping on 24/7 makes it reliable. Trying resting it and bill a bit.

trying contact lost

good day at gym Hot day
Car wouldn't start. I'm used to it. I know when to replace the battery.
I have to turn it over every morning. That keeps its chin up, if not driving.
I left it til after gym. That's why. Booster worked √ maybe not tomorrow

Skype call is intrusive from Dad. Me have the same disposition. I try to bend to his strict 9am slot. Available from 5am, online, waiting.
He cancels any call from me. Shows online but disappears. He makes the attempt. I rush to grab the device. Disappears. Offline for my return call. Why? Shy?

Always go pub with friend. Just today, no response. I'd go & ring the bell but I know I'd wast my time and walk.

I'm a keeper upper. Not a turner downer. Not a rejector. A giver. Not a taker.

Main tainor. No terminator - I'm incredibly prone to that treatment. Heavy Duty
Oohhhhhhhhhhh... swathes of phone calls & texts from recruiters today. ALL DAY. Now. New one. Bang Bang Bang.
Tactic is prettied-up "I like You" NO! Bulldog treatment. All the prelude to interview torture. No response to their attempts. hen I ever did, in the last 3 decades: all rejection hangup. If I don't respond now, that will write me off onto their blacklist. Have been on the list for 3 decades. Not a few agencies. Several hundreds of firms. Their week start on Friday and ends on Friday.

I have my book prepared for ready to publish.

Head-numbing twinkly-winkly texts now accompanied by repeated more repeately microwave beep telling me the chicken is defrosted. Wearing me down until I finish typing this.


worker |<------recruiter / lawyer /----->| employer

LIFE = LUCK. No magic. someone made a fluffy subjective decision which affected you and will forever
twitchy666 is online now  
 
post #24 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 10:20 AM
Protector of the Den
 
slyfox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Michigan
Gender: Male
Age: 33
Posts: 14,755
My Mood: Confused
People are mean. Only people I've ever liked making fun of because of their looks are people who've bullied me. Otherwise, I just leave people alone. Not sure if I really look bad but I've had a lot of people make fun of my looks and the way I talk. Hate how people make fun of others. If we aren't doing something to bother them, they should just leave us alone. They just want to make themselves feel better or up their social status with others.
slyfox is offline  
post #25 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 11:24 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by Imbored21 View Post
Post pic so we can tell you how to become hot.
I cant be hot. I have tried to copy what I think is hot and I cant be that way. I tried everything.

@skyisblue , I didn't mean that since i won't get married/have kids that i should die..what I meant was if I am suffering like this and i have no one to be responsible for, why live decades like this? I'm just depressed and it's the depression talking. I feel hopeful sometimes.
Also it doesn't bother me what my sister looks like; it's other people who always compare us. I try to be happy for her but it's so hard.
It's hard to believe I don't need beauty to be happy though.

Thanks for everyone's input; I'm reading all responses and taking everything into consideration.
river13 is offline  
post #26 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 12:02 PM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
I want to be accepted. Why don't people understand that? We're all humans and that is a basic need. I'm not saying I want to be "normal" because there is no normal and a lot of people pretend their lives are perfect but below the surface they're not, and I realize this. But I think most people will understand why I want to be pretty. Everybody, especially guys, like pretty girls, come on. It's not a ridiculous thing that I want. Maybe I want to be accepted for who I am. I'm not sure. I just want to feel ok when I go out.
Rejection leads to the breakdown of society so my anxiety is normal. Its hard to embrace who i am when most people see something wrong. I feel like I should take a hint. I pretend everythings fine and that I look fine but that seems to make people mad especially guys. THey hate to see an ugly girl having a good life. If I look happy in some way, they'll try to make me miserable, that's just my experience.
Maybe I can't take the adversity but no one would want this for their life.
Why have any skills or anything at all if they won't be recognized? Is that ok with all of you? That you never get attention or recognition? No you dont want that.
river13 is offline  
post #27 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 12:18 PM
SAS Member
 
Farideh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Tucson, Arizona
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 10,691
Why are ugly people mean to ugly people? Why are ugly people mean to pretty people? Everyone is mean to each other. Sure they don't deal with it as much as pretty people, but they're guilty of doing the same ****.
Farideh is offline  
post #28 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 03:00 PM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by Farideh View Post
Why are ugly people mean to ugly people? Why are ugly people mean to pretty people? Everyone is mean to each other. Sure they don't deal with it as much as pretty people, but they're guilty of doing the same ****.

What's the point of this post? I didn't ask "why are attractive people mean to ugly people" you're implying that I think attractive people are jerks and I'm not saying that. I asked why are people mean to ugly people
river13 is offline  
post #29 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 06:03 PM
SAS Member
 
Farideh's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Tucson, Arizona
Gender: Male
Age: 29
Posts: 10,691
Quote:
Originally Posted by river13 View Post
What's the point of this post? I didn't ask "why are attractive people mean to ugly people" you're implying that I think attractive people are jerks and I'm not saying that. I asked why are people mean to ugly people
Oh I'm definitely aware of what you meant. I'm just mentioning that people are also mean to pretty people obviously for different reasons. People are mean to ugly people because they fear ugliness as if they would be ugly too. That's why you see people befriending good looking people. Ugly people are ignored because nobody wants to impress an ugly person unless there is something they admire about that ugly person. People try to impress good looking people because of their status and mostly to get in their pants. It's a stupid world full of surprises. It's your decision whether you will let it continue to bother you.
Farideh is offline  
post #30 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 08:29 PM
SAS Member
 
skyisblue's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2014
Location: Kansas
Gender: Male
Age: 35
Posts: 576
Quote:
Originally Posted by river13 View Post
Is that ok with all of you? That you never get attention or recognition? .
Actually, yes, it is ok with me. I have no desire for others' approval.

After being by myself so much, I've learned that we don't need anyone's approval to be happy.

Needing approval from others is a crutch.

I refuse to let others dictate my feelings.
skyisblue is offline  
post #31 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-21-2015, 08:53 PM
speechless
 
ChrissyQ's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Vancouver Island Canada
Gender: Female
Age: 40
Posts: 1,710
My Mood: Sad

in same boat


I'm in the same boat river

http://www.youtube.com/channel/UCJXl...?feature=watch

http://www.youtube.com/user/ChrissyQ33
The biggest disease in the world today is the disease of ppl feeling unloved, unwanted & uncared for - Princess Diana
"Ppl are not nice therefore my life sucks" -Elin Larson
When shyness goes way beyond anything you could every imagine..
ChrissyQ is offline  
post #32 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-22-2015, 09:51 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by skyisblue View Post
Actually, yes, it is ok with me. I have no desire for others' approval.

After being by myself so much, I've learned that we don't need anyone's approval to be happy.

Needing approval from others is a crutch.

I refuse to let others dictate my feelings.
Well you said you were good looking so I'm sure if I was good looking I wouldn't need anyone's approval either. In fact I know I wouldn't. Everyone would want to be around me so I wouldn't even need to worry about that type of thing.
river13 is offline  
post #33 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 06:35 AM
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Gender: Female
Age: 27
Posts: 234
What? so do you look like an alien or something? cause I hardly ever saw people being mean for others mainly for their looks. I can understand if its for dating purposes. Guys can be harsh on ugly girls. If that matters to you the most and you see no other way out, then plastic surgery is the answer. Period.
bintuae is offline  
post #34 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 06:39 AM
I need women
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Gender: Male
Posts: 219
I like to be silly/stupid but being nasty I use always as a last resort. It seems people choose to be nasty and revel in it.
selfloathingregular is offline  
post #35 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 09:12 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by bintuae View Post
What? so do you look like an alien or something? cause I hardly ever saw people being mean for others mainly for their looks. I can understand if its for dating purposes. Guys can be harsh on ugly girls. If that matters to you the most and you see no other way out, then plastic surgery is the answer. Period.
People are mean to others just for their looks. I don't know why you don't believe that. And no, I'm not trying to get dates so I have no idea why people even care to treat me so bad.. I wish I knew why. Plastic surgery is definitely not the answer.

I also noticed that its the biggest crime for an ugly girl to go around with some confidence. I might get a day here and there where I feel good about myself and have some confidence.. that's a huge mistake to many people.. they will let you know you're hideous soon enough. People have been aggressive with me about it too.. I feel unsafe at times and it even feels like someone could actually punch me in the face for being so ugly. I get looks at me ALL THE TIME that say " I want to kill you" ... and people start stuff with me in public all the time
river13 is offline  
post #36 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 09:12 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
Quote:
Originally Posted by selfloathingregular View Post
I like to be silly/stupid but being nasty I use always as a last resort. It seems people choose to be nasty and revel in it.
Could you explain what you mean by this? I dont really understand it
river13 is offline  
post #37 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 09:57 AM
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2015
Posts: 13
Quote:
Originally Posted by river13 View Post
People are mean to me because I'm ugly. My therapist and psychiatrist don't believe me. I tell them the things that happen to me and they say the normal b.s. like that person's having a bad day or it's not about me, it's about them.

But I'm suffering so bad from it and I get no help from therapy because they will not acknowledge the problem. I'm really depressed about this and I don't go out of the house. How do I deal with the world when people are unfair to me just for being ugly? I can't change it. How do I get a therapist to help me? Will anyone ever believe me?
Don't let people define who you are. I've known people who take the word: "positivity" and taint the word's true meaning. It made me not want to be anything like it. Until I redefined it. People taint the same, with "beauty" and "ugly". Those people aren't worth your time or attention. And as time goes on you can guarantee that their personality and morals will get as sh**y as mud.You know, I'm at that point in life where I prefer to be ugly to the opposite sex instead of attractive. I actually hope I'm ugly. Most would blame it on my bad experiences or cynical nature but when you start looking at the flaws of the people who only want to see the "bad" or "unattractive" in you, it becomes very easy. Why would I want to impress some ignorant waste of life with a big mouth and nothing decent to offer or be around. Get new therapists, and tell them that you don't feel like you're being heard.
dark2spine3 is offline  
post #38 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 10:41 AM
Zodiac Sign: LEO!!!
 
KILOBRAVO's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: The United of the Kindoms!
Gender: Male
Posts: 10,645
My Mood: Angelic
Quote:
Originally Posted by river13 View Post
People are mean to me because I'm ugly. My therapist and psychiatrist don't believe me. I tell them the things that happen to me and they say the normal b.s. like that person's having a bad day or it's not about me, it's about them.

But I'm suffering so bad from it and I get no help from therapy because they will not acknowledge the problem. I'm really depressed about this and I don't go out of the house. How do I deal with the world when people are unfair to me just for being ugly? I can't change it. How do I get a therapist to help me? Will anyone ever believe me?
NO: YOU aren't ugly , I Am sure of it. I mean , what sort of 100% proof or examples do you have that people treat you badly cause of being ''ugly'' ?

Have you remembered any instances in the past of actual rude comments or things like that ? I bet you have never actually been called ''ugly'' face to face

Your ''ugliness'' I a sure is just somethign you are imagining and you have, have, have to begin to like yourself more , after all, you are currently seeing a therapist, so it has been established that some part of your thinking or mental health isnt quite good at this time and you visit there to find ways to improve whatever problems you have just now

Believe me, when people are nasty or berate or ridicule another person IT TRULY IS the problem with the nasty person , they are the ones who feel bad and they pick any silly thing to make themselves feel better. Your therapist is right and isnt just saying stock phrases in a therapy session
I am very sure you aren't ugly and in fact I dont ever really remember ever seeing a truly physically ugly person

Waiting for a beam to break through here,
A chain-way vision bright and clear,
This must be it,
Longed for Bliss,
First it was so quiet and now I know I am not alone in here.

___________
Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride, nobody gonna slow me down. I gotta keep on moovin!

If you can read this, you must look at my profile page. I like people who have attention to detail, and curiosity. Have a look, the lion's torso is on diplay :-p
KILOBRAVO is offline  
post #39 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 11:28 AM Thread Starter
SAS Member
 
Join Date: Dec 2013
Posts: 84
i've been told to my face too many times not to believe there's something wrong
river13 is offline  
post #40 of 102 (permalink) Old 08-24-2015, 11:35 AM
Dog Lover
 
Entrensik's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Colorado
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Posts: 1,492
My Mood: Cold
Self Acceptance. When you accept yourself you wont care what people think of you. Come to terms with your looks and no one will ever hurt you for it. Read my previous posts ive explained this in more detail. Or get yourself a copy of this book.


the shyness and social anxiety workbook by sean cooper

Live for the progress that you've made.
Entrensik is offline  
Reply

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page



Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Just wondering, why don't people want to befriend ugly people? Vilanelle Frustration 11 09-11-2014 02:54 PM
Does it bother you when ugly people call other people ugly? Farideh Frustration 72 03-19-2014 02:19 AM
when ugly people call beautiful people ugly just becuz they're jealous G girl Coping With Social Anxiety 32 12-28-2011 02:36 PM
Do people sometimes call people ugly when they have a major crush on them? Pumpkin Pie Frustration 34 12-11-2011 06:06 PM

Posting Rules  
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome