Psychedelic Medicine, Therapy and Science - Page 5 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #81 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-15-2018, 03:32 PM
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id try it but id want to make sure my envorionment didnt have any windows to fall out of or stairs to fall down
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post #82 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-17-2018, 03:41 AM
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MDMA has great success with treating ptsd (which is where my social issues hail from.) https://newatlas.com/mdma-ptsd-succe...results/57074/ there are tons of articles this is just one I saw recently.

MAPS is now conducting phase 3 clinical trials. I've been in touch with one of the site doctors to be included in the trial. My hesitation is phase 3 is double blind, placebo controlled so it's just as likely I'd receive a placebo than treatment. https://maps.org/research/mdma/ptsd/phase3

I also know one therapist who will administer and sit with you if you want to use MDMA for therapeutic purposes. I know there are more but since i already have a relationship with them i think I'm going to with them. We'd be following the MAPS protocol anyway. I'll wait til i talk with the site doctor to make sure i fully understand the study before i decide which path I'll take.

I don't take drugs recreationally and am even wary of them therapeutically, but I'm definitely open to something having such great evidence backed success.
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post #83 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-17-2018, 04:39 AM
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I wish i could have some psychdelic medications right now, like magic mushrooms or something like that, that iv never tried before so i can buzz out while im trying to a learn biochemistry

But in all honestly i would absolutely love to try one of those therapy sessions where you take MDMA or something, although i did believe there were more of a myth or hardly accessible
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post #84 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-17-2018, 11:46 PM
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id try it but id want to make sure my envorionment didnt have any windows to fall out of or stairs to fall down
If you know the dosage of your psychedelic medication, and if you start small, then there isnt much that can go wrong. I've taken up to like 200ug of lsd and havent had any ideas to jump out of windows or anything. I can definately see how things could go wrong in a significantly higher dose though, especially with a person who isnt very careful-minded. I've found that the worst places are bathrooms and kitchens, especially when you're in such a deep state of trance(or zoning out) that you almost forget that you're standing up. Aside from that its fairly safe if you are cautious, its not like you lose your coordination on stairs or anything but the echoing of senses can make it hard to figure out which step you're on. I mean i would say that a relatively low dose of psychedelics is on a similar level of safeness to getting significantly drunk.

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MDMA has great success with treating ptsd (which is where my social issues hail from.) https://newatlas.com/mdma-ptsd-succe...results/57074/ there are tons of articles this is just one I saw recently.

MAPS is now conducting phase 3 clinical trials. I've been in touch with one of the site doctors to be included in the trial. My hesitation is phase 3 is double blind, placebo controlled so it's just as likely I'd receive a placebo than treatment. https://maps.org/research/mdma/ptsd/phase3

I also know one therapist who will administer and sit with you if you want to use MDMA for therapeutic purposes. I know there are more but since i already have a relationship with them i think I'm going to with them. We'd be following the MAPS protocol anyway. I'll wait til i talk with the site doctor to make sure i fully understand the study before i decide which path I'll take.

I don't take drugs recreationally and am even wary of them therapeutically, but I'm definitely open to something having such great evidence backed success.
It is good to be wary about using psychedelics even for therapeutic purposes, because any mind-altering substance is a mind altering substance. These things can change you. They can cause you to think in very counter-productive ways, but with a little less overthinking and a little letting go rather than holding on/holding back, i have found that psychedelics have helped me to think in a very mentally efficient and emotionally beneficial way. I've learned to flow in a beautifully relaxing/therapeutic stream of somewhat meditational consciousness. In other words, psychedelics can help you to think for the best, instead of in the very rugged and painful and self-destructive thought patterns/levels that people normally think in.

Normal thinking is doomed to negativity, and constant overthinking/overanalyzing of the psyche(and of its connections to the external reality) leads to negativity and frustration and emotional/mental "dead ends" so to speak. Which in turn leads to further negativity and to a loss of psychological balance in life. Thats some of my findings so far anyway. But at the end of the day, if the studies say that psychedelics can help with anything from anxiety/depression to PTSD and heroin addiction, then that alone is proof of the positive and powerful therapeutic effects of psychedelics.


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I wish i could have some psychdelic medications right now, like magic mushrooms or something like that, that iv never tried before so i can buzz out while im trying to a learn biochemistry

But in all honestly i would absolutely love to try one of those therapy sessions where you take MDMA or something, although i did believe there were more of a myth or hardly accessible
LSA is a very useful psychedelic for medicational/therapeutic uses. Quite similar to LSD in most aspects, but a lot easier to access, i highly recommend googling "LSA" if you are interested. Just make sure you are fully aware of what you are doing and about the side effects and the laws etc etc.
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post #85 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-24-2018, 12:52 PM Thread Starter
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Isn't it considered unethical to not offer the real substance after you got the placebo? I recall this was the procedure in at least one of the recent trials with psychedelics. They wouldn't withold such information from you before the trial, I presume.

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post #86 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-24-2018, 01:24 PM Thread Starter
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If you know the dosage of your psychedelic medication, and if you start small, then there isnt much that can go wrong. I've taken up to like 200ug of lsd and havent had any ideas to jump out of windows or anything. I can definately see how things could go wrong in a significantly higher dose though, especially with a person who isnt very careful-minded...
I'm concerned about this logic. I'm not an expert nor very experienced, but reducing the risk to a matter of dosage is ehh, risky. Starting from the tripping threshold you are taking a risk. Previous experiences with x or y dosage are no guarantee for a comparable experience with the same dosage, particularly when it concerns psychedelics. There's always an element of gambling invloved.

That aside, I'd be interested to hear about your experiences and insights and how they affect your life.

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post #87 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-24-2018, 10:36 PM
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I'm concerned about this logic. I'm not an expert nor very experienced, but reducing the risk to a matter of dosage is ehh, risky. Starting from the tripping threshold you are taking a risk. Previous experiences with x or y dosage are no guarantee for a comparable experience with the same dosage, particularly when it concerns psychedelics. There's always an element of gambling invloved.

That aside, I'd be interested to hear about your experiences and insights and how they affect your life.
Yeah good point, it is a gamble, i mean i guess i should have said that it is still kind of dangerous. Like being fairly drunk, it has its risks and dangerous stuff can happen. But with low doses of psychedelics i have never come close to the "jumping out of window" stuff that you hear of. Although i have heard of cases where people got pretty shaken and rocked on low doses so i dont know. But at the same time, with experience and starting low and with careful precautions/mindfulness, then it isnt something people should be scared off from.

Oh i'm not really experienced haha but as with most people who take psychedelics, i've gotten some decent insights. Usually the typical "there is more to consciousness" and "positivity is vital" and "we are individually defined by our perceptions" etc. Nothing outrageously mindblowing yet. It has affected my life in various ways, i empathize more and i let go of my sense of self a little. And while it has made me doubt my entire grasp of reality/thoughts, it also helped me to think for the best. What about you? You seem to have a lot more experience, and i think i saw somewhere in this thread that you planned on doing an Aya ceremony or something? I've recently gained some interest in Ayahuasca due to its apparent spiritual/healing nature and its very entheogenic vibe. Although i certainly wont try it any time soon haha!
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post #88 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-25-2018, 10:19 AM
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There are several species of psilocybe that grow naturally where I live including the most potent in the world ( psilocybe azurescens ), I dont trust myself to not pick a deathcap or something equally horrible though, so I dont take my chances with that.

I have taken high enough doses of thc that might be considered "heroic" though and have had transformative introspective experiences from that, that I would like to call psychedelic even though I don't have the comparison.
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post #89 of 116 (permalink) Old 11-25-2018, 11:07 PM
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There are several species of psilocybe that grow naturally where I live including the most potent in the world ( psilocybe azurescens ), I dont trust myself to not pick a deathcap or something equally horrible though, so I dont take my chances with that.

I have taken high enough doses of thc that might be considered "heroic" though and have had transformative introspective experiences from that, that I would like to call psychedelic even though I don't have the comparison.
Hmm yeah you want to be very, very careful when/if you are hunting for your psychedelic medicine. Dunno about USA, but here we have a close relative of Azurescens which is Subaeruginosa, pretty similar i think. So anyways there is a highly toxic species called Galerina Marginata, which looks almost exactly similar to the two aforementioned active species. The only diffrentiation to tell if it is poisonous is stuff like a lack of blue bruising(in almost all cases, although in rare cases poisonous ones have bruised blue) and a slight difference in hue of the stem and cap. I am also currently hesitant to hunt for any due to the risk of picking a deadly species.

THC is actually quite good for having transformative and introspective experiences. I mean i doubt that THC could reach anywhere near a heroic level, cause like even a low dose of psychedelics can send someone beyond being baked/blazed and they eventually just get exponentially stronger as the dosage increases. But THC is partially characteristic of a psychedelic experience and you can have some whopping good insight on that stuff. One time on a weed trip, i realized that beneath my mental constructs/foundations, my life was empty and lonely as hell lol.
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post #90 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-04-2018, 06:20 AM Thread Starter
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Sounds pretty positive what you've gained from your experiences. It reads as "getting out of your own way" a bit. How often do you do this kind of thing and is there anybody with you or are you alone? Do you use some kind of ritual? Specific purpose? What safety concernes, I think it's a good idea to keep Stan Grof's view of psychedelics being "non-specific amplifiers" in mind. Since so much of us is unconscious, you can get an ugly surprise, of which the intensity partly depends on the dosage. We all work with what we've got, I get that.

I've stayed away from psychedelics virtually all my life believing it's the last thing anyone that emotionally unstable should turn to. It took the worst crisis in my life in '06-'07 to change this. My resulting experience with iboga didn't lead to much. In hindsight I think I didn't have the proper framework for it. I was still too much a human doing instead of a human being. It may also have been not the right substance for me. Anyway, I abandoned the idea. More than ten years, the 2nd + 3rd worst crisis of my life, a lot of research and careful consideration later I arrived at ayahuasca. The irony of my previous conviction is that I likely wouldn't still have been around if I hadn't taken aya this summer. It is arguably the most therapeutic intervention (on an extensive list) I've tried in the two decades dealing with "mental illness". The two experiences with aya were some of the most excruciating I've ever had and the profundity of the resulting internal shift is according (few!). I haven't felt broken in the core of my being ever since and I'm no longer suicidal. Besides horrific, they were also heart opening (ego-dissolving) experiences, which I've taken up as an incentive to reconnect with my mother whom I hadn't seen in years.

It's not all roses though. I feel like a part of early childhood trauma has been integrated, but the rest of it is close to the surface, often making life very hard. I hardly feel depressed anymore, but I do experience a lot of direct emotional pain. Being more aware of the mess under the hood is a double edged sword. Experiencing the seriousness of it on a daily basis keeps my attention where it should be. On the other hand, basically living in the stench of my emotional cesspool isn't getting me further. I'm afraid I'm going to need more of these interventions to integrate a significant amount of what's split off. So I'm in the process of planning more aya ceremonies, while making the most of the previous and staying afloat. One way I try to keep the momentum going is by microdosing 1P-LSD. Thus far, I'm not sure what this brings me. That's the short version.

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post #91 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-04-2018, 03:49 PM
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Sounds pretty positive what you've gained from your experiences. It reads as "getting out of your own way" a bit. How often do you do this kind of thing and is there anybody with you or are you alone? Do you use some kind of ritual? Specific purpose? What safety concernes, I think it's a good idea to keep Stan Grof's view of psychedelics being "non-specific amplifiers" in mind. Since so much of us is unconscious, you can get an ugly surprise, of which the intensity partly depends on the dosage. We all work with what we've got, I get that.

I've stayed away from psychedelics virtually all my life believing it's the last thing anyone that emotionally unstable should turn to. It took the worst crisis in my life in '06-'07 to change this. My resulting experience with iboga didn't lead to much. In hindsight I think I didn't have the proper framework for it. I was still too much a human doing instead of a human being. It may also have been not the right substance for me. Anyway, I abandoned the idea. More than ten years, the 2nd + 3rd worst crisis of my life, a lot of research and careful consideration later I arrived at ayahuasca. The irony of my previous conviction is that I likely wouldn't still have been around if I hadn't taken aya this summer. It is arguably the most therapeutic intervention (on an extensive list) I've tried in the two decades dealing with "mental illness". The two experiences with aya were some of the most excruciating I've ever had and the profundity of the resulting internal shift is according (few!). I haven't felt broken in the core of my being ever since and I'm no longer suicidal. Besides horrific, they were also heart opening (ego-dissolving) experiences, which I've taken up as an incentive to reconnect with my mother whom I hadn't seen in years.

It's not all roses though. I feel like a part of early childhood trauma has been integrated, but the rest of it is close to the surface, often making life very hard. I hardly feel depressed anymore, but I do experience a lot of direct emotional pain. Being more aware of the mess under the hood is a double edged sword. Experiencing the seriousness of it on a daily basis keeps my attention where it should be. On the other hand, basically living in the stench of my emotional cesspool isn't getting me further. I'm afraid I'm going to need more of these interventions to integrate a significant amount of what's split off. So I'm in the process of planning more aya ceremonies, while making the most of the previous and staying afloat. One way I try to keep the momentum going is by microdosing 1P-LSD. Thus far, I'm not sure what this brings me. That's the short version.
Yeah, it's great to get out of our own way cause a lot of our "way" consists of the urge to satisfy the sense of self. Which is pointless really. I feel like just letting things be and detatching from those strenuous mental connections is a much more healthy way to live. Oh i just trip once a week, and without any ritual or anything. My purposes are kinda split, like half the reason i do them is for an amazing experience and have the reason i do it is to get in touch with my higher self whilst learning/growing. Yeah psychedelics can reveal a few scary truths but as someone with lots of problems and not too much to lose, i think it is worth the risk. One scary thing about psychedelics, apart from the frighteningly real perspectives of reality/problems they can offer, is the fact that they peel away a lot of your coping mechanisms. Took me significant effort to sink back into the delusion of sanity, guess i realized that you gotta have some kind of grip on "reality" in life. Otherwise everything turns to mud haha.

About abstaining from psychedelics, it really depends on how emotionally unstable someone is, like you i also thought that psychedelics would be super rough on my already weak mind. But actually not only is it possible to safely navigate through a psychedelic experience for an emotionally unstable person, but they also have an amazing healing potential. Yeah ibogaine isnt for everywhere, definately not, you mostly hear of people using it to overcome addiction and stuff. Ayahuasca is often said to be best for purging oneself of impurities/flaws. That's amazing, it seems like Ayahausca benefited you a lot. I cant comprehend the magnitude of healing/fixing potential that it has but if people say such good things about it all the time then i am really interested in trying it eventually. I also have a lot of crap in my head, that probably goes deep down.

Well do you find that you are able to at least detatch yourself from some of the trauma? Unless it permanently shifted your thinking intensely, then it might be possible to sort of slowly focus on striving towards a positive mindset. I havent tried such powerful trips so i may not know what i'm talking about, but i find that even though psychedelics can show some scary stuff that can linger in your mind, it is best to sort of just accept reality and focus on thinking for the best instead of holding on so hard to that new perception. Cause life is so screwed up, if anyone was to face reality without at least some form/extent of detatchment, then they would go crazy. Sometimes that mess under the hood is simply best to be covered up. Everything is a huge mess under the hood really. There would be infinite suffering from everything in every way, if it weren't for the barriers of our perception. Interesting, do you mean that the LSD microdosing helps you to cope with the way things are in your situation, and to go forwards?
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post #92 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-05-2018, 05:12 PM
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I don't know if this has been mentioned already on this thread because I don't care to read through 5 pages of posts but there is an initiative in Oregon to put medicinal Psilocybin on the ballot for 2020. https://www.countable.us/articles/16339

I think it will likely be legal for medicinal use in Canada for medicinal uses within 10 years, possibly sooner.

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post #93 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-15-2018, 04:47 AM Thread Starter
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Very interesting. I'm in a bit of a hurry atm, but I'll respond properly later.

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I wasn't aware of that. Do you have any insight in the likelihood of that passing? It would be nice to base policy on scientific findings instead of panic for a change. Rick Doblin said Trump recently signed a "right to try law" for MDMA on the basis that it's unethical to withold this option from people who are willing to pay for it themselves and who exhausted other options. Recently I heard Dennis McKenna say he expects psychedelic treatments to be available in Canada within five years. Seems like a major shift in attitude towards these compounds is going on in North America/globally or I'm completely biased. https://thera-psil.ca/reasoning/
Please enlighten me on the situation in Canada, this is fascinating!

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post #94 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-15-2018, 05:35 AM
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Isn't it considered unethical to not offer the real substance after you got the placebo? I recall this was the procedure in at least one of the recent trials with psychedelics. They wouldn't withold such information from you before the trial, I presume.
You were absolutely correct! I went in for my first in person screener yesterday (I've done 2 phone screenings previously.) The treatment will be offered afterwards if you receive the placebo, so that's awesome. There are so many checkpoints and screens you have to go through to be accepted. I won't know for at least 2-3 months whether I'll be in the study. Then if I receive the placebo, it would be about a year til I get the real treatment. In any case, glad the process has started. Wish me luck. I was super shut down emotionally throughout (false self was on full display,) but hopefully they were able to get the info they need.

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Know your ACE (adverse childhood experiences) score?
Sometimes, SA is a symptom of significant developmental, attachment or interpersonal trauma (emotional neglect counts). If you're still stuck after you've tried SA treatments such as CBT and exposure, research C-PTSD and see if it resonates. Here's an awesome resource. Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving
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post #95 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-16-2018, 12:39 PM Thread Starter
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Weekly trips he says! Tell me some more! I can relate not having much to lose and much to gain from the use of psychedelics and them peeling away coping mechanisms. It creates tremendous opportunity for personal transformation. Back to the drawing board, in a sense. I don't know about you, but I was very vulnerable in the aftermath of my experiences and I can't imagine having to go to work or school in such a state. For a couple of months. Those environments are difficult to navigate with a weakened ego. That's why I think psychedelics-assisted psychotherapy is a very good idea. The iron needs to be forged when hot.

What I find myself becoming more aware of and dis-identifying from are (subtle) ways of hypervigilance and reactivity. I'm finding other ground to stand on within. This is a result of integrated trauma. There is less in the outside world I have to defend myself against because there's less inside which is on the verge of entering my consciousness when it resonates with that. I'm less afraid to be authentic and more willing to be vulnerable in social interactions and also more aware of the suble ways I was not in the past. I'm able to be more present instead of fighting with internal sensations in particular situations. It's all still very fragile though. A seed is sprouting and I'm doing my best to nourish it in every way I can. Microdosing is one, but I find it very hard to determine what it does for me.

Suffering continues as long as that stuff under the hood is being triggered by situations in the outside world and your defences against horrible **** rising to the surface remain at the wheel. If life is somewhat livable like that it might be better to leave it alone. I have no choice but to go for the source though. Getting there has failed with many other approaches and living around it failed miserably. The strength of aya for me, is that it removes the illusion of "away" while it puts me in the midst of where the hurt is. This internal connection is changing how I connect outside (a friend says it's one and the same thing). There's a lot of overlap with what Rosalind Watts talks about in this talk:

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post #96 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-16-2018, 12:54 PM Thread Starter
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Sweet! Completely understandable that your survival self took over. I'm pretty sure they would have kept you there longer if they needed more info from you this round.

Will you manage to hang in there if you happen to get the placebo first or will you explore other options in that case? I wish you luck in any case!

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post #97 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-17-2018, 03:13 AM
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Unfortunately, I have no choice but to hang in there if I want the MDMA specifically. The person I thought was open to do it (sit with me,) turned out not to be. The other person they sat with was microdosing MDMA and had a lot of experience doing so previously. They didn't feel comfy doing a first trip especially with a therapeutic dosage. I completely understood. Plus tbh, I don't do drugs period lol so it was quite wishful thinking that I could get my hands on it lol. Not cool enough for a rave, just uncomfortable enough to not go on tor to find it. So all said and done, I'm staying legally a good girl. If the study doesn't work out, I may try aya or research a few other things (possibly psilocybin.) Honestly, as impatient as I can be, I'm pretty happy and hopeful with the pace of my recovery. So I'll keep chugging along chemically unassisted until the right opportunity falls into my lap. Hopefully the study will just work out.

Re being shut down: they definitely got the info they needed, but when I'm very shut down I minimize my experience beyond belief. I caught myself doing so a few times, so hopefully they got an accurate enough read of my experience. Rather than my protector mode 'everything is fine' story.

Miles to go before I sleep.

Know your ACE (adverse childhood experiences) score?
Sometimes, SA is a symptom of significant developmental, attachment or interpersonal trauma (emotional neglect counts). If you're still stuck after you've tried SA treatments such as CBT and exposure, research C-PTSD and see if it resonates. Here's an awesome resource. Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving
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post #98 of 116 (permalink) Old 12-17-2018, 10:50 AM Thread Starter
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It's great things are moving. The perspective of a psychedelic intervention coming up, legal or less so, has significant value in the current moment. Being "content" with your current pace of your recovery isn't a small thing either. It pleases me to read stuff like that! *does a pom pom dance thing*

Is there a fear they might still exlude you from the study because you may have come across as "too healthy"? Those PTSD researchers are well known with coping mechanisms. This one included. If I had to design a study, the level of dissociation before, during, and after the intervention would be one of my interests. Someone who's more dissociated prior is actually very interesting if you want to demonstrate the efficacy of an intervention. You may have done yourself a favor here.

In the unlikely event that you'll fall through, I'm sure you'll arrange the most sane alternative available. And there are a bunch to choose from, not necessarily invloving an illicit substance. I was excluded from a psilocybin study because I couldn't wait for it to start and went ahead with aya. When I later applied for it, they couldn't use me. People with psychedelic experiences bring expectations into the experience and therefore are unsuitable test subjects for these kinds of psychedelic studies. Best to stay above ground if you possibly can, not in the least because it ensures you of proper psychological care around taking the drugs. I help you hope the study will just work out.

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Weekly trips he says! Tell me some more! I can relate not having much to lose and much to gain from the use of psychedelics and them peeling away coping mechanisms. It creates tremendous opportunity for personal transformation. Back to the drawing board, in a sense. I don't know about you, but I was very vulnerable in the aftermath of my experiences and I can't imagine having to go to work or school in such a state. For a couple of months. Those environments are difficult to navigate with a weakened ego. That's why I think psychedelics-assisted psychotherapy is a very good idea. The iron needs to be forged when hot.

What I find myself becoming more aware of and dis-identifying from are (subtle) ways of hypervigilance and reactivity. I'm finding other ground to stand on within. This is a result of integrated trauma. There is less in the outside world I have to defend myself against because there's less inside which is on the verge of entering my consciousness when it resonates with that. I'm less afraid to be authentic and more willing to be vulnerable in social interactions and also more aware of the suble ways I was not in the past. I'm able to be more present instead of fighting with internal sensations in particular situations. It's all still very fragile though. A seed is sprouting and I'm doing my best to nourish it in every way I can. Microdosing is one, but I find it very hard to determine what it does for me.

Suffering continues as long as that stuff under the hood is being triggered by situations in the outside world and your defences against horrible **** rising to the surface remain at the wheel. If life is somewhat livable like that it might be better to leave it alone. I have no choice but to go for the source though. Getting there has failed with many other approaches and living around it failed miserably. The strength of aya for me, is that it removes the illusion of "away" while it puts me in the midst of where the hurt is. This internal connection is changing how I connect outside (a friend says it's one and the same thing). There's a lot of overlap with what Rosalind Watts talks about in this talk: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WtU3FP-ZLGw
Bit of a read, hope it isnt too boring to read. I get carried away sometimes lol.

Oh i'll just have a mild trip once every week or so. Havent done any super deep stuff yet. Yeah psychedelics can really help you to think for the best, i mean they shake up the foundations of your coping mechanisms to some extent but they do allow immense opportunity for growing as a person. And a lot of it all from my point of view is really just coming to terms with your problems, undergoing catharasis so to speak, and then deciding how to deal with it all and what kind of grip on reality/coping mechanisms you can use that works best. In that sense, i think psychedelics have helped me to really shoot for the stars emotionally/mentally. But too bad psychedelics are not quiiite a time machine haha. Yeah, "back to the drawing board" lol, although lets hope we dont spend too much of our lives "drawing". Damn, that's awful, do you mean the aftermath of the negative incidents you experienced? Cause i can probably relate to that feeling of a weakened ego, i often feel like my ego is so weakened that i cant really cling on to reality properly. Unless of course you are talking abour your Aya experience. Oh i agree with you there, sometimes the best time for a psychedelic therapy experience is right when the iron is hot. Right when your ego is loose, when you feel really lost and distant from everything. It can be a refreshing or depressing but crucial opportunity to just step back and view everything from a more universal perspective.

That's great, that you are improving in that area. I think it is true when they say that the worst enemy is ourselves. We should be worrying less about the external environment, because that is why we worry internally in the first place. Instead of gluing our ego's, and consequently our emotional response mechanisms, to external factors that dont quite flow with our ideal state of being, we can just be ourselves and be happy. By letting go of our ego a bit. And in some sense, i feel like people should just be vulnerable and speak their mind really, i mean humanity is so compartmentalized into individual ego's and perceptual cages of culture or social expectation. When instead we could just eliminate all those barriers altogether, along with their corresponding limitations and negative effects, by breaking away from it all. With our without the unilateral effort of people. Society is a prison, and ego is a cell, and the only way to break from it all is to break from it. Hmm yeah i dont know much about microdoses either but maybe it helps you to sort of break down those walls a bit.

Good point, it is hard to be happy when there's some real big nasty problems looming over your mind all the time, constantly being triggered by day-to-day life. I guess with my problems, i have recently learned that staying at the "wheel" all the time is no way to go through life. Maybe it even contributed to a lot of my detatchment from reality, just getting so lost between all these concepts to the point where my ego is losing its grasp. But i do think it is possible, at least for my problems(i dont know about yours), to sort of let go of that wheel and to let go of that control. I found this extremely hard to do, and it took me years of immense frustration, but i was finally able to just let go. It might not apply to your situation, but it may be possible to sort of be one with your reality despite the majority of negative circumstances. To sort of just revert to a more primal level of existence, to dwell in a more survival ego rather than a thrive ego. I use this whenever things get too tough to cope, i try to just breathe and accept reality and deactive those fear/anguish mechanisms. I try to attain a perspective/perception that allows me to be at peace, regardless of past or future. Almost as if problems arent to be a source of suffering, but rather to be a situation that is to be calmly navigated, the worst outcome of which would be something that does not threaten the physical wellbeing and does not have any benefit in affecting the psychological wellbeing. But i havent really been through trauma, so dont know if it would help with your situation much or not. Been through a crap ton of misery and psychological deprivation/distress though and i can say it helps me. I hope you find a way out of it some day, and find the source.
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A Melbourne Hospital Will Trial Magic Mushroom Therapy for Dying Patients


An interesting article I came across today.

Here's the link to the article

Quote:
Dr Bright explained that by disabling the “default mode network” of the brain—that is, the neural network associated with a person’s typical way of thinking—psilocybin can provide people with “a completely different perspective on their situation” and zoom in on thoughts or ideas that we typically repress or pass over.
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