my therapist disaproves of this website - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:01 PM Thread Starter
 
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my therapist disaproves of this website


I hope I dont get people upset by this, but my therapist thinks that this website is a bad idea becuause all of our minds think exactly alike (well very similar) so its kind of like the blind leading the blind. He didnt say it in that way, but that is what I gathered. He thinks its a bad idea because we cant really help eachother by just complaining to eachother, it will just make us more depressed. I agree that it doesnt help much to just complain to eachother, but i think if we can try to stay positive and focus on getting better rather than posting things like "i cant live anymore" it will be better for all of us.

I agree that it feels good to post an "outburst" of frustration on here much like it feels good to journal but unfortunately it puts the reader of the post at a disadvantage to getting better.
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post #2 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:03 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


It might be blind leading the blind but where else can you go and actually relate with people with the same exact problems???? Its good to talk with others about similar problems.
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post #3 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:04 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


You could also make the case that since the therapist does not have SAD it's like a fish trying to teach a bird to fly.
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post #4 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:06 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


What a bunch of bull excrement. Your therapist needs to see a therapist and talk about his insecurities and superiority complex. JMO.

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post #5 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:16 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


He's a quack. In other words, he thinks people with this disorder should go on feeling completely alone. This board is a sense of relief to new comers, I see it every day! A good place to start on the road to recovery, in my opinion.
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post #6 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:31 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Quote:
Originally Posted by Mngirl
I hope I dont get people upset by this, but my therapist thinks that this website is a bad idea becuause all of our minds think exactly alike (well very similar) so its kind of like the blind leading the blind.
Therapists only know about things that help overcome SAD from reading books. People at SAS know what works from experience.

Nobody loves me but my dog, and I think he might be jivin', too.
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post #7 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 03:42 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Hmmm... I think that your therapist has a point. I was in analytically based therapy for 8 years and that was all about digging up the root causes of my issues, working through them (big time!) and her challenging my beliefs, values and perceptions and asking me a lot of very uncomfortable questions. People on this board sometimes challenge you but that's not like seeing a therapist.

But I think that your therapist has overlooked a whole big part of this board. People here help each other. I once posted a thread about my laptop having become quite slow. I got a few replies and someone was nice enough to post a step-by-step guide to disk defragmentation. Without that I probably still wouldn't know what to do

The board is also good for practicing social skills I think.

Maybe your therapist should have another look. they probably don't know what it's like not to have anyone to ask for help/ advice or comments even on totally trivial matters.
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post #8 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:14 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Lisa, your broadband has kicked in huh??

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post #9 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:29 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Your therapist can shove it.
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post #10 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:37 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


I agree, this website is not helpful, it's just whines and complaints. Funny this is, nobody even asks for help, they just whine. Ask for help people >.>

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post #11 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:41 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


So what if people wanna ***** n' moan too? Makes me feel better to get my frustration out...and if there are those who think it's not helping. You know how to leave.
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post #12 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:52 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Quote:
Originally Posted by Razorblade Kiss
So what if people wanna ***** n' moan too? Makes me feel better to get my frustration out...and if there are those who think it's not helping. You know how to leave.
Exactly, Ashley!!!

No one is forced to log on and hang out here...And I dont recall that SAS has ever presented itself to be a magical cure for SA, rather just a support forum...
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post #13 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 04:56 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


When I come here to complain I feel immediately better. I feel as if I have made some sort of connection, no matter how small, and that there are others who understand the way that I am feeling even though I may be surrounded by people in real life who do not really understand. The problem is that complaining becomes a means of temporarily feeling ok with the way that you are, and the way that you are is usually completely unsatisfying and depressing. So the cycle repeats itself. People complain to feel better, then eventually feel worse, and come back again to complain so they can maintain some sort of status quo. The only way to not feel the way you are feeling now is to not behave the way you are behaving now. The only way to not behave the way you are behaving now is to be exposed to external opinions and conditions that lead you to some other path or way of acting.

I've seen this in plenty of other forums, and understand it because the process relives itself in me almost every day. I don't know if I have control of my actions or not. I feel that I should, and should thus take responsibility to do something other than explain the way I feel, to actually ACT and change something. Inevitably though, I get stuck in the same rut and same patterns of behavior. I would hope that people here wouldn't come to snap decisions and shoot the messenger. I would hope that they would realize that opinions that are contrary to their own may hold the seed to recovery.
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post #14 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 05:17 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Quote:
Originally Posted by Maslow
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mngirl
I hope I dont get people upset by this, but my therapist thinks that this website is a bad idea becuause all of our minds think exactly alike (well very similar) so its kind of like the blind leading the blind.
Therapists only know about things that help overcome SAD from reading books. People at SAS know what works from experience.


The therapist is worried about his income and the competition this forum offers him.

Does your therapist have SA? No, he learn't his stuff from books which are compiled from the complaints of SA sufferers. It is called research.

While it is true, people complain about their problems on these forums, people also offer insight about the problems. I am not saying that you don't need a therapist, you do. You will recover with his help and your own research such as SAS forum. More important, you have to ACT to combat your fears. If you don't ACT both your therapist and this forum is not helping you.
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post #15 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 06:06 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


This website gives a sense of community which is very valuable. You find out you are not the only one facing these problems. You find out ways to deal with challenging situations. Just the act of communicating with others is valuable for those of us who don't get much interaction. It is a place you can go for support or advice when you are struggling with something. Just know that is there is helpful. You also feel some value in yourself if you are able to give advice to others. I've also met a few people from here in person and that is worth a lot to me.

There are also some valid concerns. If you need a good kick in the butt, you aren't going to get that here. You could say it makes it easier to passively accept all the crappy things going on in your life. I think that might be the area a therapist would be most concerned about. Beyond that, I find the negativity affects me and I have to be careful about which topics I read. I guess I'm also careful when I watch the evening news for the same reason.
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post #16 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 06:08 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


I think your therapist doesn't approve of this site, because this site is competition for him. If you get educated about SA here (especially about alternative therapies!), then you can't depend on him to tell you everything about SA.

But I do agree with the "blind leading the blind" part. For example, if I wanted advice on how to give a presentation, I wouldn't be looking here. I'd look in a book, most likely. This site is more appropriate for venting, talking to like-minded people, and sympathizing with each other, and there's nothing wrong with that.
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post #17 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 06:19 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Quote:
Originally Posted by whiteclouds
I think your therapist doesn't approve of this site, because this site is competition for him. If you get educated about SA here (especially about alternative therapies!), then you can't depend on him to tell you everything about SA.

But I do agree with the "blind leading the blind" part. For example, if I wanted advice on how to give a presentation, I wouldn't be looking here. I'd look in a book, most likely. This site is more appropriate for venting, talking to like-minded people, and sympathizing with each other, and there's nothing wrong with that.
Wouldn't advice on how to deal with social anxiety during a presentation coming from someone who has experienced such a thing be pretty helpful?
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post #18 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 06:20 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


...and there are people here who can really give great advice even if they're in the same boat.
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post #19 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 06:23 PM
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


I've had way better advice from people here than I've had from anywhere else.
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post #20 of 94 (permalink) Old 10-13-2007, 07:51 PM
 
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Re: my therapist disaproves of this website


Venting is healthy. Your doc doesn't know what he is talking about.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Lisa1975
The board is also good for practicing social skills I think.
A very positive aspect of coming to these boards.
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