Have you ever been in love? - Social Anxiety Forum
View Poll Results: Have you ever been in love?
Yes 15 53.57%
No 13 46.43%
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post #1 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 02:17 PM Thread Starter
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Have you ever been in love?


Yes or no?
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post #2 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 02:58 PM
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Never had the chance for my romantic feelings for anyone to evolve beyond a mere crush. My crushes die miserable deaths once it becomes clear the other party isn't interested, which is always the case.

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post #3 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 03:55 PM
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I'm not sure. I might have, but in hindsight it seems more like infatuation.
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post #4 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 05:41 PM
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I suppose that it depends on how you define love. But the short answer is yes.

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post #5 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 05:49 PM
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post #6 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 05:59 PM
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No I have had many one sides crushes but I don't think that kind of mutual connection is something that's possible for me for a number of reasons.
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post #7 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 06:20 PM
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Yep. The first time was when I was 17 - but I hardly even knew her. The next one was much more real - and lasted a lot longer.

Being 'in love' and loving someone I'd say are 2 different things. And they can mean different things as you get older in my experience.
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post #8 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 06:23 PM
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If you're deeply convinced that everyone out there looks down on you being in love is out of question.
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post #9 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 06:26 PM
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Yes, a few times. And it sucks. Because eventually (in my case at least) it ends. I can't sustain long lasting relationships for whatever reason. Something overloads in my brain and I get overwhelmed.

Everybody knows you only live a day but it's brilliant anyway
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post #10 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 06:45 PM
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I wish.
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post #11 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 09:07 PM
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Yes.
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post #12 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 09:31 PM
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I was in love with her but she was not in love with me.
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post #13 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 11:01 PM
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No. And I don't think I'm capable of it anyway.

"Here we may reign secure, and in my choyce / To reign is worth ambition though in Hell: / Better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heav'n" - "Satan", Paradise Lost
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post #14 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 11:14 PM
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Yes.

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post #15 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-11-2020, 11:43 PM
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Thankfully, no. It sounds like psychological torture tailored to SA sufferers.
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post #16 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-12-2020, 01:00 AM
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I don't know. It's always been unrequited and painful. Doesn't seem like what love should be.
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post #17 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-12-2020, 09:43 AM
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have i ever been in love.....no.....ive never had a girlfriend either nor have i ever had sex!
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post #18 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-12-2020, 11:17 AM
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I still don't know what that is.

I would say I have been in something between love and a trauma bond. Does that count? lol

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https://balancedminds.com/audio/
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post #19 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-12-2020, 11:48 AM
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Yep, and I also had my heart broken and crushed into a million pieces. I think after the first time I fell in love, I was incredibly careful not to ever let myself get that attached to a person, it really is unhealthy. People say it is better to love and to have lost, than to never have loved at all - and I can see their point.. but that first relationship hurt a lot. I was 17 at the time, believed I would never be in a relationship, and once it did happen I think I just lost myself to it. Phew, I was pretty naive, and I was also inexperienced and believed all of the stuff I saw on TV about love, I was a hopeless..


When she broke up with me, I had contracted mono from her.. I was incredibly sick for weeks, and lost 60 pounds - I think a lot of that illness was due to just giving up on life, it really did hurt. It took a few years to get over it, no kidding.



Being in love for me, was like being on drugs. It was really strange, I felt a constant high, I would always be thinking about her, it was a real trip. Now that I look back on it, I think it is scary just how nutty I was about it. Not dangerous mind you, just wacky.. I was off in lala land. I felt like I was under a spell, to be honest. Have you ever seen a movie where someone has a love spell cast on them, or they drink a potion, whatever... yeah that is what I was like It was a voluntary enslavement of the mind, which is hard to describe.


I did hook back up with her briefly, years later, in fact she is the reason I found my wife. She wanted to try to get back together and found me through the Internet. One of the reasons I moved to Florida was to see her again, but the "spell" had run its course by then though, and I was no longer in love with her.



I've loved since then, but as far as being "in love" to the point of a stupor as I had once been in, no thank god. I do love my wife, and would die for her, when she is away I miss her, I am to a point in love with her but not like the first and that really is a good thing. I don't feel like a slave to love with my wife, and that is not how love should be anyway.

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post #20 of 33 (permalink) Old 08-12-2020, 12:50 PM
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Yes! Sometimes it's really weird.

Leonard Cohen (Bird on a Wire): I have tried in my own way to be free
Mrs Hudson (BBC Sherlock): Sherlock! The mess you've made!
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