Combination of both. Although as I got older, I like to say I've gotten better at looking at things more factually to correctly determine which one to blame.
While having had to deal with various difficult and unreasonable people and also growing up with an abusive narcissist, this is usually a struggle.
What goes up, will inevitably come back down. Whoever you have to step on when you go up, you will be at their mercy when you go down.
The truth is strictly what the ones in power perceives it to be.
Enjoy any good things, even the little and menial ones, as you will never know what impending distresses could descend upon you in a moment.