Wearing the same clothes - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 40 (permalink) Old 01-28-2020, 10:10 PM
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I think one common thing people with money who give a damn about how they dress is buying new clothes. Someone in the Hip hop crowd might buy thousands of white t-shirts for $20 or $30 each and wear 2 a day and then donate them or throw them out. Dame Dash was doing that and the Game the rapper, spent over 1 million on white t-shirts, the same crowd will spend a million or more on a sneaker collection.

Then Italians with money might buy suits and dress shoes, like John Gotti would wear only brand new suits, just worn one time.

Then you have the "punk" skateboard kids, who might buy hundreds of Vans sneakers and baggy skater pants, or hipsters might buy a lot of fedoras.

I just think with my lifestyle, and lack of social life, i don't have the energy or care enough to wear decent clothes or buy new clothes. The whole process sickens me.
It bores me and maddens me at the same time. I almost hate guys who have perfect haircuts and freshly pressed button down shirts and brand new khakis. Those types seem
to hate and judge me the most. Like i am supposed to care that you look like a J. Crew advertisement with your ridiculous Banana Republic/Gap/J. Crew look with the perfect hair and shave? Maybe I am the wacko for not dressing like that, i don't know.

It is weird though that I have some real idea that certain clothes look good on me, but I make absolutely zero effort to wear them, I am either rebellious or an idiot or lazy or something

With women, none of this really applies. I think some women look good in t-shirt and jeans, but i would not judge women's clothes the same way i would a guy for some reason.
But women who dress fancy like Prada or Gucci with the expensive handbag, i feel completely inferior to those women and wouldn't even be caught looking at them you know
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post #22 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-07-2020, 11:51 AM
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I have one main pair of trousers that I wear when I go out. Thats it.

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post #23 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-07-2020, 11:42 PM Thread Starter
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Steve Jobs always wore the same outfit, and as his name implied he had a job or two
gives me hope
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post #24 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-08-2020, 12:04 AM
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I feel the clothes are kind of irrelevant. Reading your post and some of the comments (@Disheveled and Lost , I am looking at you), a lot of ideas about clothing are really just an expression of people's low self-esteem.

To me, it makes no difference if a person wears the same outfit 365 days a year, provided that they have a change and wash their clothes regularly. I used to look down on people who made an effort with their clothing, which was an expression of my own insecurities. I would gaffa tape my jeans and shoes, and feel superior because I "didn't care". I felt contempt for people who always had a fresh haircut or wore designer ****.

It really is not about the clothes, folks. Clothes are just a way you can express yourselves, and it can be fun. People who are really bothered how everyone else looks are just insecure themselves. Nevermind them, do your own thing. Wear the same overalls for a year or wear designer. Whatever you like.

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post #25 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-08-2020, 12:11 AM
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Since I don't have a job then I only have a select few clothes and that makes it tough to want to leave the house and see people you know. Does anyone else relate?
I mean..this is serious for me. Way back when my anxiety was beginning to become problematic one of the major reasons that I didn't even want to go to church was because I always wore the same outfits and didn't have much of a variety..it then even became hard to go to certain stores where employees most likely could notice me wearing the same outfits..
Now its still a problem for me today as we basically only frequent one store for groceries and stuff..and I've coincidentally seen this same employee guy almost every single time I go there and I'm always wearing the same shoes and jeans and jacket..:+(
Its a motivator to get a job for sure but its hella depressing and difficult to deal with and its either feel ashamed or be stuck..
There are some people who have multiple copies of the same clothes. I'm like that. Black T shirt and Blue Jeans were pretty much all I wore. Every single day. I don't think people pay as much attention as you think they do. Unless the clothes look dirty or you have body odour. Most people don't really take notice.
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post #26 of 40 (permalink) Old 02-08-2020, 11:35 PM
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Yeah, I have considered updating my wardrobe. I sort of dress super casual and laid back as a comfort thing when I am able, but I am not sure that projects the right image that I should be going for. I have always thought men's clothing options aren't that great though. Most of the choices seem to be directed to either 15 years olds or 55 year olds. Women seem to have so many more alternatives.
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post #27 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-04-2020, 03:53 PM
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There is no need to feel embarrassed about not having a lot of clothes. One might say that it's a luxury to be in possession of more garments than seems necessary for looking and smelling clean.

Doing away with the culture of negligent consumerism is good for the environment. So it is OK to be proud of a wardrobe that is on the small side -- just as it is OK to be proud of reusing a sturdy carrier bag, or refilling a metal water bottle from the tap (instead of repeatedly buying disposable plastic bags and bottles).
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post #28 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-04-2020, 04:17 PM
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some of my clothes are stained with **** from work - oil, rust. that annoys me a lot, since they hardly pay me much at all. replace my clothes mother****ers! some have holes in them that i need to fix, mostly from cycling (thighs rubbing/stress). what is left is not much. i can wear some of the same things for 4 days. same shorts, singlet. smell check. doesn't need a wash yet. not a worry. could do with buying some t-shirts.

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post #29 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-05-2020, 09:59 AM
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Originally Posted by rabidfoxes View Post
I feel the clothes are kind of irrelevant. Reading your post and some of the comments (@Disheveled and Lost , I am looking at you), a lot of ideas about clothing are really just an expression of people's low self-esteem.

To me, it makes no difference if a person wears the same outfit 365 days a year, provided that they have a change and wash their clothes regularly. I used to look down on people who made an effort with their clothing, which was an expression of my own insecurities. I would gaffa tape my jeans and shoes, and feel superior because I "didn't care". I felt contempt for people who always had a fresh haircut or wore designer ****.

It really is not about the clothes, folks. Clothes are just a way you can express yourselves, and it can be fun. People who are really bothered how everyone else looks are just insecure themselves. Nevermind them, do your own thing. Wear the same overalls for a year or wear designer. Whatever you like.
I don't think someone is expressing themselves if they're buying clothing for a brand name. They've just been manipulated by typically billionaires into spending money they sometimes don't have for an aesthetic they typically don't even really like. I support buying cheap/fake designer stuff though.

But I don't look down on people for the amount of effort they put in, and making all your own clothes would be more effort than buying designer stuff anyway.

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post #30 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-05-2020, 12:28 PM
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Originally Posted by Sweet&Sour View Post
Since I don't have a job then I only have a select few clothes and that makes it tough to want to leave the house and see people you know. Does anyone else relate?
I mean..this is serious for me. Way back when my anxiety was beginning to become problematic one of the major reasons that I didn't even want to go to church was because I always wore the same outfits and didn't have much of a variety..it then even became hard to go to certain stores where employees most likely could notice me wearing the same outfits..
Now its still a problem for me today as we basically only frequent one store for groceries and stuff..and I've coincidentally seen this same employee guy almost every single time I go there and I'm always wearing the same shoes and jeans and jacket..:+(
Its a motivator to get a job for sure but its hella depressing and difficult to deal with and its either feel ashamed or be stuck..
I wear the same thing pretty much every day if I don't go out. I only really change when the season does, so right now it's thermals, joggers, fleece that someone bought me for christmas, hat and a scarf I was given, two pairs of socks and some slippers that are useless lol. some of it is now old with holes in it. its a bit of a weird looking mismatch but it's practical. I try to look half decent when I go out since I don't think I could deal with any more weird looks than I already get.
you can get cheap clothes for outdoorsy stuff though. I bought some shirts that were second hand the other week and it cost me a fraction of what the same looking ones would have cost in the premium section of stores. my trainers are looking pretty bad though, falling apart, I am waiting for a sale to come along. I don't think sports companies make trainers like they used to, all my recent ones have fallen apart pretty quick.

I like donuts
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post #31 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-05-2020, 01:04 PM
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I don't think wearing the same clothes is a big deal. Just maintain good hygiene and wear whatever you feel comfortable in. You don't have to dress to impress anyone.


Some people need to put more effort into their appearance in order to feel comfortable. They may want others to perceive them in a certain way or just use fashion as a form of self-expression. And that's fine too.
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post #32 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-07-2020, 11:41 AM
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I don't think someone is expressing themselves if they're buying clothing for a brand name. They've just been manipulated by typically billionaires into spending money they sometimes don't have for an aesthetic they typically don't even really like. I support buying cheap/fake designer stuff though.

But I don't look down on people for the amount of effort they put in, and making all your own clothes would be more effort than buying designer stuff anyway.

Sure, but buying designer doesn't equal 'buying only for the brand'. There are people who have their favourite designers because they do like their particular aesthetic and can afford it. Personally, I don't see the point either, but I'd defend their right to choose.

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post #33 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-07-2020, 11:58 AM
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It almost sounds as if your personal style is to dress well and have a big variety of outfits to choose from and having abandoned (or been forced to abandon) that, you might project that feeling of abandonment and disappointment onto others. Of course, that may be what I'm doing right now because what really makes me feel badly about disregarding how I dress is that wearing interesting clothing is something that I love to do but haven't done in years.

...you gotta keep the goal in mind, develop tunnel vision to a certain extent. it's hard, and it's not for everyone.

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post #34 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-07-2020, 12:04 PM
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IDK, I have a lot of clothes that are "name" brand. But I never paid much for any of them. If they were new they were either on clearance or discount. A lot of my clothes were used from ebay or Goodwill - I just buy ones that didn't look to have been worn much or at all. I've gotten to where it's rather pointless to spend money to advertise for some clothing brand. If anything they should pay the person buying the T-shirt with the name in huge letters to advertise for them.

To be honest, I don't really pay that much attention to what other people wear, unless they have a style I really like.

When I was younger, my school clothes were all nerdy looking, and when I got older I wanted to have my own style and shed the nerdy image.

I like having a nice haircut and beard, it makes me feel more confident, but really the statement that "clothes make the man" is completely untrue. You have to have the right personality and confidence. Clothes might make you feel better but if you don't have good posture, outgoing, etc people will still be put off. It's nowhere near as easy as just having the right look.

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post #35 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-07-2020, 02:16 PM
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I've been wearing the same windbreaker jacket for the past year whenever I go out. But I have a closet full of clothes that don't fit me. I dress as lame as you can get. Shorts and shirt and jacket. Will be glad to throw out these fat clothes someday and try some clothes I own that I've never worn.

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post #36 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-07-2020, 05:25 PM
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If it makes you feel any better, I worked in a grocery store for a long time and I can guarantee the employees don't give a damn what you're wearing as long as you don't smell bad. They see sooo many people in a day that one person out of hundreds isn't going to stand out unless it's in some unpleasant way.
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post #37 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-11-2020, 11:26 AM Thread Starter
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It almost sounds as if your personal style is to dress well and have a big variety of outfits to choose from and having abandoned (or been forced to abandon) that, you might project that feeling of abandonment and disappointment onto others
Donno how you came to this conclusion but no, you have a wrong presumption, I'm not projecting. I've never had a big variety of outfits and have never dressed well, so I wasn't forced to abandon clothing nor have really abandoned much clothing over the years.
Im literally just telling it like it is in my post..for me I barely have clothes right now and I've barely ever had any different outfits as I've grown up especially being jobless.
Im not some snob over clothes and I will never be the person that wastes or doesn't use the outfits and clothes I do acquire and accumulate in the future/as time goes on. I have given away a few of my few bit of clothes over the years that don't fit me or that I didn't wear often as well.
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post #38 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-11-2020, 11:31 AM Thread Starter
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If it makes you feel any better, I worked in a grocery store for a long time and I can guarantee the employees don't give a damn what you're wearing as long as you don't smell bad. They see sooo many people in a day that one person out of hundreds isn't going to stand out unless it's in some unpleasant way.
thanks for this message.
you're right I may be overthinking but I think they do take notice even if its not a big negative..
however, I do have good hygiene (and all the basic things I need and more, so I am grateful )
I also look pleasant, cute, and presentable even with few clothing choices : )
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post #39 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-11-2020, 11:58 AM
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Donno how you came to this conclusion
I was projecting....

Quote:
.....Of course, that may be what I'm doing right now because what really makes me feel badly about disregarding how I dress is that wearing interesting clothing is something that I love to do but haven't done in years.

...you gotta keep the goal in mind, develop tunnel vision to a certain extent. it's hard, and it's not for everyone.

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post #40 of 40 (permalink) Old 03-11-2020, 08:19 PM Thread Starter
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I was projecting....
oh :/
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