You don't have to go through the exact same problem to co-exist with them. It's a matter of acceptance. Just knowing that '' hey everyone has their problems and they need to do what they need to do. I might not understand it, but there's more to it.''
When it comes to disability, as a rule of thumb, you should just treat everyone indifferently. Their disabilities are their own struggle and they have their own ways of coping with it. So just focus on what needs to be focused on. Eg: If you're playing basketball with someone in a wheel chair....Do not alter your playing style to '' cater '' to them. Just play the way you always do, and let them play the way they do.
But people aren't like that. Even if their intentions are good. They know that they're not supposed to make fun of people's disabilities. So instead they'll go the other extreme and offer unwanted pity, 24/7 sympathy and BS like that.
Well, the problem is where to draw the line. If someone discriminates against me, I need to remind myself that it's not their fault that they don't understand people like me. "Everyone has their problems," and in this case, it's ignorance/lack of exposure to people like myself. To what degree should I accept their behavior?
If you don't understand someone's problem, it can be hard to even recognize that there is
a problem there that you don't understand. With something like a stutter, people understand that there is a problem that they need to be sensitive about. And that may lead to the pity reactions that you're describing. But with many kinds of mental disorder, the disorder is only visible as "mood" or "making bad decisions". It's often extremely hard for another person to tell, based on your facial expression or behavior, that you have an anxiety disorder (for example) and that you're not simply being rude.
Most of the present circumstances of my life can be traced back to my various disorders, but to other people (like my father, who doesn't understand mental illness) it looks like I'm just making "a series of unfortunate decisions." At what point is a person allowed to criticize another person's behavior? If I complain about being poor (which is a byproduct of my disorders) are they entitled to tell me to shut up and get a job? Because to 99% of the population, it just looks like I'm lazy.
If any negative behavior can potentially be traced back to one kind of disorder or another, are we ever entitled to be upset about another person's behavior? The point being, if someone truly sees the world differently than we do, they often see it so
differently that they're not even in a position to understand that we experience their behavior as being rude or offensive. Many of the people who offend us really are trying very hard to be nice. Is it right for us to be angry at them?