The voodoo of socialization - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-08-2019, 10:29 AM Thread Starter
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The voodoo of socialization


Without exact rules, it seems like a sure loss.

I guess you have to not care about screwing it up to give it a try. I refuse to try something that I don't think I can be good at. Talking to someone. Without the exact rules on how to do it right, how do you do it?

Taking that chance. It may fail. I can't handle that. Mime forever. The best of all the bad options.

Worse than that, I've seen the tactics of the supposed conversational wizards. They are vomit worthy in terms of fakeness and stupidity. Just overall atrocious.
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post #2 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-08-2019, 11:26 AM
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Talking to someone online I don't mind, as long as the person interests me. But I don't really talk to people in real life at all unless it's necessary. If someone talks to me, I'll talk to them for as long as I have to, and then bye-bye. I'm not the least bit interested in talking to most people. Most people are pretty boring and I'm not interested in their lives.

Through oblivion I charge
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post #3 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-09-2019, 10:45 AM Thread Starter
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Yep, boring and uninteresting.

They're all going to church or the vet or whatever. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZ I have to make up stories about my idea of perfect people to read about. They're generally anorexic, suicidal women on the verge of middle age. I've written many short stories about them.

I really don't even want to talk to one in person, but I just think about how it would be. It's a nice thought and about all I can find to give any kind of spice to life.
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post #4 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-11-2019, 08:51 PM
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we care too much. or other people don't care enough.
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post #5 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-12-2019, 04:22 AM
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Originally Posted by Ohio Fatso View Post
my idea of perfect people to read about. They're generally anorexic, suicidal women on the verge of middle age.
Tha fawk?
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post #6 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-12-2019, 07:40 AM
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post #7 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-12-2019, 08:10 AM
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You have to want to connect with people and feel like you can connect.

Personally, I can't connect with anyone, so I don't even try any more.

... Hold on, let me check my calendar. Nope, nothing planned for the rest of the year.
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post #8 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-12-2019, 11:44 AM Thread Starter
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Tha fawk?
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Yeah, I think a lot of this problem is that we weren't really meant to deal with people.

I know I wasn't. My ideal day seems to be sitting in a graveyard or desolate forested area alone writing stories about anorexic women trying to starve themselves to death before they get too old.

Every weekend, this is what I end up doing. Hell, I've got enough money that I could go do a lot of things. Things that all suck compared to what I just talked about.

If people come out where I am sitting alone doing this, I get pissed off and either honk my horn at them and/or drive away to another secluded spot.
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post #9 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-14-2019, 07:34 AM
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I have to make up stories about my idea of perfect people to read about. They're generally anorexic, suicidal women on the verge of middle age. I've written many short stories about them.
Are they posted somewhere where one could read them? I'd be interested and think it could be entertaining.
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post #10 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-14-2019, 09:23 PM
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Only about 1 in 10,000 people are interesting to me or even worth dealing with. I spent 99% of my life sexually frustrated but i briefly dated gorgeous women. The only way was to become the BS artist and create a fake phony personality. This was very rare but my point is, after dealing with friends or some women in flings, I realized that the end result of socializing is just disappointment anyway, so why even bother. I have the ability to become this exciting guy through conversation, but all those people will end up backstabbing you or leaving you behind. It is all too complicated in the long run. I am happy to just go to pro sports games alone in silence and watch reality TV now. But like i said, why even try to develop a personality, then meet people, knowing that eventually whatever person you counted on, after being this "fun exciting guy", will make demands, spread lies about you, put words in your mouth, insult you, look down on you, talk behind your back etc.

Even if you do develop a good personality, your success rate with people is very small. Only very few people will like you or "get you" which means you have to go out into the world and try and talk and put yourself out there and deal with rejection. Even talking to a person for more than 1 minute at this point seems to take more energy than I can even imagine. I am missing out, but I don't have the energy anyway, I am too old and tired and run down
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post #11 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-14-2019, 11:35 PM
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post #12 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-15-2019, 02:47 AM
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Wow, someone I used to talk to on here.
Yo Ohio.
(Hi and probably bye because I also can't talk to people.)

**** you and your mandatory custom signature.
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post #13 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-15-2019, 04:05 AM
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I refuse to try something that I don't think I can be good at.
That rules out conversation and pretty much life in general.

Leonard Cohen (Bird on a Wire): I have tried in my own way to be free
Mrs Hudson (BBC Sherlock): Sherlock! The mess you've made!
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post #14 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-17-2019, 02:23 PM
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Yeah, it does feel like everyone else was given a script and I'm left to fumble through my lines, fearing that I'll disturb the sequence and then the walls will fall down around me and I'll be pelted with tomatoes by the booing audience. Okay, so in those most anxiety-inducing situations, I try and reverse it by thinking about how their interaction benefits me, and not if I'll fail to please them etc. Kinda works, kinda doesn't. Eh.
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post #15 of 15 (permalink) Old 04-20-2019, 12:44 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ohio Fatso View Post
My ideal day seems to be sitting in a graveyard or desolate forested area alone writing stories about anorexic women trying to starve themselves to death before they get too old.
what's your fascination with anorexic women ?

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