(Support Thread) What's Bothering You Right Now? - Page 629 - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #12561 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-13-2019, 08:35 PM
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I suck and nobody will ever love me I'm going to be alone til I die.

I don't even know why I continue on, there is no reason for me to continue this B.S. existence any longer. I'm sorry I am such a loser.

Making The Choice To Ride BMX Is An Opportunity To Become Infinitely Better At Something, There Is No Ceiling To Hit In The Realm Of Freestyle BMX.
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post #12562 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-13-2019, 10:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ckg2011 View Post
I suck and nobody will ever love me I'm going to be alone til I die. <a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/icon_sad.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a>

I don't even know why I continue on, there is no reason for me to continue this B.S. existence any longer. I'm sorry I am such a loser. <a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/bawling.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a><a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/bawling.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a><a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/bawling.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a>
I feel ya man.
That's a lot of hurt/self-hatred to carry around in your head. I know it's not easy to rid yourself of those sorts of feelings. But try not to let yourself hate yourself that deeply. You have value, even if you don't see it.

Hope you're feeling better or will soon. But if not, that is ok too : )

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post #12563 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-13-2019, 11:02 PM
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I suck.

always
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post #12564 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 02:50 AM
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Ads for Father's Day.

I already got through my dad's birthday, but at least it wasn't being advertised everywhere I go.

It is the light she longs to find,
When she delights in learning more.
Her world is learning; it defines
The destiny sheís reaching for

- Marie Curie
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post #12565 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 07:57 PM
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Had a dream that I overdosed last night, which is the first suicidal dream I've had in a while.

"Though my soul may set in darkness, it will rise in perfect light;
I have loved the stars too fondly to be fearful of the night."
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post #12566 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-15-2019, 10:01 PM
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Mom's bf sleeping over.

~ How can I build Your kingdom if I'm building my own
How can You be my treasure if I'm digging for gold
How can You be my fire if my heart has grown cold
How can You be my future if I've made this my home ~ Love & the Outcome
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post #12567 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 05:34 AM
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How people can have casual flings, hook up or 'discover' themselves but it seems like I hardly get any attention at all. Like, it feels like anyone can just decide to go out and meet someone, and they do it. But it's so hard for someone like me.

Be kind to one another
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post #12568 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 01:11 PM
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The fact the listening to thread keeps restarting. So il post it here. Hope this helps to calm you down.


Our hopes and expectations. Black holes and revelations.
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post #12569 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 02:56 PM
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Even when I try to be nice to my dad on fatherís day he ****s on me... I bought him a large sub rather than a regular cuz i thought why not go all out, and he complains that it isnít a ďsmall.Ē You didnít even pay for it you toxic *******.. god iím starting to feel like i wonít care when he passes away.
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post #12570 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 05:19 PM
 
 
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Today is father's day. I haven't talked to my dad for almost a year now. I should call or message him today but I really don't want to. I don't want to see or talk to him ever again.

The only reasons I could think of that I should:

-guilt and anxiety about it. (Esp with my step sister. I feel awkward talking to her about it)

-he left all his stuff to me in his will and he has probably less than 10 years left. (****ed up to say but it's one of the only pros I can think of)

But that's about it. I hate talking to him or spending time with him. I always dreaded any occasion like my birthday or the end of August because it always meant I had to see him.
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post #12571 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 05:52 PM
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Gave my father a call just now. It was awkward as hell. I could tell he couldn't wait to get off the phone. It was my second time talking to him recently after quite some time, as he any my mother called yesterday for my birthday. I'm sure he wouldn't have if they hadn't been driving together. Something about it pisses me off. Could at least make an effort.
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post #12572 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 06:37 PM
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Ugh...

Making The Choice To Ride BMX Is An Opportunity To Become Infinitely Better At Something, There Is No Ceiling To Hit In The Realm Of Freestyle BMX.
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post #12573 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 07:42 PM
 
 
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Ugh he texted me "waiting for your call..."

I really don't care. He treated me ok but he treated all the other women in my life like ****. He cheated on my mom and probably my step mom and associates himself with an unrepentant child molester. He knew that this guy was ****ing 12 year old girls and did nothing. He didn't care, he was ****ing prostitutes in Thailand himself. I can't even explain how predatory and manipulative this man is. Both my mom and step mom are nurses because he forced them to be... so they could transition from wife to his caregiver since he is 25/26 years old than them.

Now he is pursuing an impoverished woman in Cambodia. I don't really care but she has a little girl which seriously concerns me since he was terrible to my step sister growing up.

Anyway ugh. I'm just tired honestly. I'm tired of dealing with this guy.
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post #12574 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 07:50 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by roxslide View Post
Ugh he texted me "waiting for your call..."

I really don't care. He treated me ok but he treated all the other women in my life like ****. He cheated on my mom and probably my step mom and associates himself with an unrepentant child molester. He knew that this guy was ****ing 12 year old girls and did nothing. He didn't care, he was ****ing prostitutes in Thailand himself. I can't even explain how predatory and manipulative this man is. Both my mom and step mom are nurses because he forced them to be... so they could transition from wife to his caregiver since he is 25/26 years old than them.

Now he is pursuing an impoverished woman in Cambodia. I don't really care but she has a little girl which seriously concerns me since he was terrible to my step sister growing up.

Anyway ugh. I'm just tired honestly. I'm tired of dealing with this guy.
You're a grown woman, you can make the decision to not see him anymore. You don't owe him anything, it might be hard at first but you'll probably get over it. On the other hand, you can recognize that he's not perfect and forgive him for what he's done in the past. The power is with you and whatever choice you make know that it's where you're supposed to be. Everything we experience is for our own personal evolution.
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post #12575 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-16-2019, 09:05 PM
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Wish this thread wasn't called "(Support thread.)" Sounds so cheesy. I don't want support. I just want to whine and if someone want to quote me that's fine.

"(Quoting okay)" would be better.
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post #12576 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-17-2019, 05:46 AM
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The fact I can't think straight because it sounds like the woman next to me is having sex with a bottle of Coke. Like she downed the whole thing. This happens often on a daily basis, I feel like throwing a vibrator at her.

Our hopes and expectations. Black holes and revelations.
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post #12577 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-17-2019, 01:36 PM
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I help a door open for an old guy earlier. He proceeded to mock me. **** you old man. Then I had three occasions where a door was let to slam in my face in the next hour. Twice by the same guy. Not that I expect it, but those doors close quite fast and I would appreciate a slight slowing of their progress. What happened to common courtesy.
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post #12578 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 06:12 AM
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Hard woman on the phone next to me. Please shut the **** up. You are not Gary Adair.

Our hopes and expectations. Black holes and revelations.
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post #12579 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 09:37 AM
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Guys I'm going crazy right now. In brief, my bosses give me tasks I think are too complicated for my level of experience. Im a junior lawyer in my country and they are expecting me to develop in a certain field. They gave me two tasks that seem impossible to me. I am totaly not sure how to act and what to expect. Im extremely afraid not to miss something or get it wrong. Both tasks involve communication with very serious clients. I will not get much support since there is noone at my workplace experienced enough in this field. I myself am unexperienced too. I am going crazy right now and dont know what to do. Is everything going to be ok or I'll mess up completely??? My body is tense all day. Its horrible.
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post #12580 of 13824 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 10:54 AM
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Have to go to a party to support a friend today. I have no desire to go. I know exactly what it's going to be like for me, and I know I won't enjoy it. I'm not sure if my presence would be wanted anyway. Stupid, ****ty SA always pervading my whole life.

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