soberphobia - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-26-2020, 07:10 PM Thread Starter
Damned And Doomed
 
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soberphobia


Im newly sober and clean and Ive got serious anxiety issues that are likely to never go away, though some say it will improve with sober time. Alcohol and benzos 24/7 for about 15 years since I was dependent at age 17. Ive got 11 days i believe and in detox the doctor put me on abilify,, lithium, zoloft and trazadone. My mind feels like im lost in space,panic/anxiety , insomnia, major depression and on and on.
I started out with such a determination to sobriety, it just sucks it turned into a gloomy outlook.
I think one of my meds may be worsening my MH, likely to abilify or lithium - both being used off label for panic/anxiety/depression,
but since i started them all at the same time ive got no clue which one.
i suppose the plan is to continue in sobriety and give the pills another week or 2 to get used to.
Then again some say it takes a year of sobriety to heal the brain at this level of alcoholism.
Why me??? Ah well, gotta be strong.
Any relevant opinions welcome.
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post #2 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-26-2020, 10:35 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jinx77 View Post
Im newly sober and clean and Ive got serious anxiety issues that are likely to never go away, though some say it will improve with sober time. Alcohol and benzos 24/7 for about 15 years since I was dependent at age 17. Ive got 11 days i believe and in detox the doctor put me on abilify,, lithium, zoloft and trazadone. My mind feels like im lost in space,panic/anxiety , insomnia, major depression and on and on.
I started out with such a determination to sobriety, it just sucks it turned into a gloomy outlook.
I think one of my meds may be worsening my MH, likely to abilify or lithium - both being used off label for panic/anxiety/depression,
but since i started them all at the same time ive got no clue which one.
i suppose the plan is to continue in sobriety and give the pills another week or 2 to get used to.
Then again some say it takes a year of sobriety to heal the brain at this level of alcoholism.
Why me??? Ah well, gotta be strong.
Any relevant opinions welcome.

It gets better. I've got a little over eight years clean from heroin. Nothing really to say except it takes time to feel better and it's worth. Good to find something healthier to be addicted to. It's the gym for me.
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post #3 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-26-2020, 11:39 PM
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Yeah being sober sucks, it's like someone rubbing sandpaper or dragging fingernails on a chalkboard, anyone telling you different is in denial or possibly an alien.

But if you value your life or long term health you'll have to face that chalkboard sometime.

I've been (for the most part secretly) abusing alcohol for 10+ years & though it's been a good run, the negatives are starting to outweigh the benefits, mentally paranoia alone seems to have gone through the roof in the last year, (been reading up alcohol related psychosis is a thing <a href="http://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/images/smilies/shake.gif" border="0" alt="" title="" >:-)</a>)..that's not good, thinking back the longest I've been completely sober in the last 5 years has been 1 week, I'm currently at that mark & gonna try to keep it going.






And all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way to dusty death
Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow,
A poor player that strut's and fret's his hour upon the stage and is heard no more,
It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
- Macbeth
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post #4 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-27-2020, 05:49 AM Thread Starter
Damned And Doomed
 
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Right, I know about alcoholic psychosis. I've been getting hallucinations from delirium tremens for years, but I too started getting intense paranoia. I would abuse about any drug though including meth which id use to stay up(living on the streets) for many days at a time but ultimately i think alcohol gave me long term paranoia. So I feel your pain hah.
The graves we dig for ourselves...
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post #5 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-28-2020, 01:58 PM
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It does get better. It takes a lot more work than just being clean, I think depression and anxiety are the most common driving force for the habit after a long time. I personally had to figure out new coping mechanisms/pastimes, I determined my drive to stay away from being sober was to not have to deal with reality. Meaning, it was an escape for me that became a compulsion.

One thing I tried before going sober is immersing myself, letting my body/mind have what it thinks it wants until I feel sick and repulsed by it. After that, I started scheduling, which I think has been the biggest factor for me kicking the habit, because I had way too much free time between getting off work and going to bed. And that time was usually spent being bored unless I had drugs to do. I began subconsciously associating sobriety with boredom and all the negative emotions I drowned out with drugs and alcohol.

I've been dependent since 17 too, on fewer substances and for half the time, so I salute you trying to straighten yourself out after so long. Wishing you luck man.

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Isn't it a bit early to worry about that at 7 years old?
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post #6 of 6 (permalink) Old 06-30-2020, 10:39 PM
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I'm late to this thread, but oh well. Everything you're feeling is normal. Your brain has had the rug pulled out from under it and it takes time to find its balance again. The first few months of sobriety were miserable for me. I was foggy brained and had mood swings like nothing I've ever experienced. I'd go from weeping to hysterical laughing and back again in minutes. It was like the world's worst carnival ride. Depression, anxiety, insomnia. The whole nine yards. But slowly it got better. Please be patient with yourself. I promise you're on the right track, and I promise it gets easier.
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