Posting online gives me anxiety - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 10:23 AM Thread Starter
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Posting online gives me anxiety


Posting replies online always gives me really bad anxiety. I'm always worried I'm just opening the door for me to be attacked.
like I'll relentlessly check on my replies throughout the day, and if somebody does attack me, it's like me against the world, some guy misquoting me or lying about what I said. I've gotten to where I just don't post anymore
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post #2 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 10:32 AM
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Same with me. But the more you post, the easier it becomes!
You just have to ignore those people who says something mean or against you. A lot of people feel more confident and feel like they can say anything they want online.
Just post whatever you feel like and ignore the people who are rude.
Also, try posting a little at a time for you to feel more comfortable.

"The more I see, the less I know for sure." - John Lennon
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post #3 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 10:35 AM
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What's going to happen if you're attacked?

It's not you against the world. It's you against some random internet stranger who's apparently misinterpreted your words. Or they're in a surly mood. Or they're doing it intentionally to get a rise out of people. Or they're just generally an a******. What do these things have in common -- the problem is their own, not yours.

Stand your ground and tell them to f*** off, or make like they're invisible to you.


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post #4 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 10:42 AM
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Honestly mate, I'm like you. I used to post on forums quite a bit in past (quite a few years ago now) and then hardly posted at all. This forum is the only website I am pretty much active on these days when it comes to posting stuff. I do still get anxiety, and I still feel nervous about stuff, but things to gradually become easier. Back in March 2015 (my join date to this website), it took me a few weeks to even sign up, and I felt really nervous about it. After a few weeks, it got easier, then easier, then easier. As I said I am still a bit nervous about stuff, but nowhere near as bad as I became. I was lurking from the end of 2013, and I joined over a year later.

Just post some easy going stuff to begin with, it may help. For example look in the Just For Fun section and post in the random threads. Even though at the minute I pretty much only live in that section (lol), it's mainly just because I am just a bit depressed and not knowing what to do, rather than anxiety about posting in other sections of the forum.

Take it slow, and only post if you really want to, and if it helps, try and twist it a little bit, so you don't have to talk about yourself so much, like "when I went out today" could be "when people go out sometimes, they may..." if that makes sense?


\_(ツ)_/
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post #5 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 10:50 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Gurii View Post
Posting replies online always gives me really bad anxiety. I'm always worried I'm just opening the door for me to be attacked.
like I'll relentlessly check on my replies throughout the day, and if somebody does attack me, it's like me against the world, some guy misquoting me or lying about what I said. I've gotten to where I just don't post anymore
I just quoted you, do you feel anxiety right now? Why do you care what random people think? This need for outside validation is very unhealthy, you're aware of that, yes?

"All greatness of character is dependent on individuality. The man who has no other existence than that which he partakes in common with all around him, will never have any other than an existence of mediocrity. "
-James F. Cooper


"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there... Wondering, fearing, doubting..." -Edgar Allan Poe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3bMZ5dNsl4
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post #6 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 11:09 AM
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Originally Posted by coyeyes View Post
I can relate. I'm really scared of posting and making threads.
Lately i've been making myself post replies on here but i delete most of them a couple minutes after posting.
In my head i think "no one cares about what you have to say so why bother posting"
As for threads i'll probably never have the courage to make one of those.
I don't bother creating threads anymore because quite right, most people couldn't care less. Unless the thread is very controversial or is a topic that is very popular such as dating or whatever, most people will disregard it. That said, y'all should work on your communication skills in both online and more importantly real life. Charisma is an acquired skill and if you don't put yourself out there for embarrassment, you won't get enough practice and learn by trial and error what is usually deemed socially acceptable and what is viewed as odd.

"All greatness of character is dependent on individuality. The man who has no other existence than that which he partakes in common with all around him, will never have any other than an existence of mediocrity. "
-James F. Cooper


"Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there... Wondering, fearing, doubting..." -Edgar Allan Poe

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3bMZ5dNsl4
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post #7 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 11:13 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by coyeyes View Post
Lately i've been making myself post replies on here but i delete most of them a couple minutes after posting.
In my head i think "no one cares about what you have to say so why bother posting"
The more you reveal of yourself and the more you engage, the more people will care to hear what you have to say.

Keep pushing yourself to post replies, and resist that urge to delete.


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post #8 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 11:14 AM Thread Starter
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Originally Posted by Malek View Post
I just quoted you, do you feel anxiety right now? Why do you care what random people think? This need for outside validation is very unhealthy, you're aware of that, yes?
It's not the quote nor a need for validation, rather it's the thought that I could be attacked. I know it sounds silly, I mean I'll never meet this person, but when I'm attacked I just feel guilty and anxious, I feel cornered, I feel regret like why did I post that, it would have been better not too

I feel the same way coy. like this is the first thread I've made in years. I could never do this on any other forum I browse. 'no-one cares about what you have to say' is the main thought that prevents me from posting on other forums.
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post #9 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 11:26 AM
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I post on forums a lot but mainly about my issues. I make incessant self depreciating threads i dont know why. I rarely joke around or come to socialise but that's what im like in real life aswell. What id suggest is just dont give a **** and realise you're not going to see these people irl you dont know anything about them and they dont know anything about you. Most people just care about themselves to focus too much on what you hav to say yourself
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post #10 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 11:33 AM
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Originally Posted by Just Lurking View Post
What's going to happen if you're attacked?

It's not you against the world. It's you against some random internet stranger who's apparently misinterpreted your words. Or they're in a surly mood. Or they're doing it intentionally to get a rise out of people. Or they're just generally an a******. What do these things have in common -- the problem is their own, not yours.

Stand your ground and tell them to f*** off, or make like they're invisible to you.
great advice

I'd echo what others have said; that it gets easier the more often you post. I was pretty anxious about posting when I first signed up here but I rarely feel anxious about posting these days.

I experienced a similar effect when I was working in an office for the first time and had to make and take a lot of phone calls.

I was very anxious initially and was painfully self-conscious about my collegues overhearing and judging me, but as the days, weeks, and months went by it got easier and easier until I'd enjoy making phone calls and even got a buzz out of dealing with angry customers - something that would have crushed my confidence when I first started.

I hope you continue to post @Gurii and it gets easier for you over time
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post #11 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 03:04 PM
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I'm less anxious posting here but still somewhat. I think sometimes what I say is just a "Captain Obvious" statement (probably a dated term now...) and have had people point out that I do that when all I tried to do is add to the conversation. I tend to stay silent because by the time I have come up with a reply others have already said what I wanted to say. Argh! LOL
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post #12 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 03:19 PM
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I do sometimes, I rarely start threads because it makes me anxious. Wanted to create one a couple of days ago but thinking no one would want to read it or reply. I even typed it all out but just closed the tab.

Also if I disagree with someone and I post a reply then see they've replied back, I will somethings not read it and ignore the thread.
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post #13 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 07:37 PM
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Me too! It's always been a struggle for me. I've just started doing it more this year. In fact my worst fear happened last week where I posted a comment of support on a youtube video. I didn't explain myself clearly so the person thought I was attacking them, even though I was talking about someone else and just quoted them. He called me horrible names and blocked me without letting me even have the chance to explain. It shocked me. It really showed how reactionary and angry people can be online. I would usually obsess about this, but I talked myself through it, and that this says more about their character than mine, and that those kinds of people are not worth the time to interact with. You never know what you're going to get back when you put yourself out there. You can't control their reactions, only your own. I'm still working out how I feel about putting my thoughts out there.

Still I am only just able to do this now, and I don't use my real name on anything. I don't even have facebook. I don't think I'm ready for that. Anonymity is safer. I think it's good exposure therapy to post online. Still I think it would be more difficult to start a thread on here, and I would probably get anxious about it because I've never done that before.
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post #14 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-09-2017, 08:26 PM
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i have the same problem but im wrtitng this for u to feel better,there r ppl who r just like u so its totally understandable.just dont think about it much and DO IT!!! xoxo

*^Free Spirit^*
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post #15 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-10-2017, 06:14 AM
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Honestly hun I can relate. I have SO much anxiety putting stuff online. Posting youtoob comments, instagram posts, tweets, reviews and gosh dont get me started on posting on facebook. So many times i've started writing threads on here and just deleted them,

you just have to go with it. not that many people really read deeply in what you say on online stuff. just roll with the puncers.


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post #16 of 16 (permalink) Old 06-11-2017, 01:03 AM
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lol I post mindlessly incoherent nothing all day. There is another forum is visit where I had like 20000 post and all of it was nonsense. I just like shouting into the void. It doesn't bother me. real life communication is what I struggle with. I wish I could speak openly and freely as I do on the internet in person.
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