(No Quoting, Only Venting) What’s Bothering You Right Now? - Page 56 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #1101 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-08-2019, 04:52 PM
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I wish I was finger lickin good 😞






And all our yesterdays have lighted fools the way to dusty death
Out, out, brief candle! Life's but a walking shadow,
A poor player that strut's and fret's his hour upon the stage and is heard no more,
It is a tale told by an idiot, full of sound and fury, signifying nothing.
- Macbeth
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post #1102 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-08-2019, 05:38 PM
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Today. I can’t. Will not. And don’t.

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– Meera Reed
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post #1103 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-09-2019, 07:27 PM
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I'm broken. Broken forever. I can never feel good. I can never think well. I'm hopeless. And it pains me very much to be this way and to know I'll always be. It pains me to know what I've lost. I don't know how I'm gonna live another 50 years like this. These last 5 years didn't need to happen. The best I can hope for is to find peace, but I fear I won't find peace for as long as I'm alive.
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post #1104 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-10-2019, 01:13 AM
Una imposibilidad yestoqu
 
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I had another dream to where I called this person and after approximately 2 rings, he picked up with a cheery hello. Then heard my voice, then proceeded to chew me out, saying"this again? I can't believe it. You should know better" and all annoyed with me. Then hung up. I was hurt but then like... pathetic because I'll take that more than nothing. Oh,good lord. There is no backstory or maybe there is one but I don't want to tell.
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post #1105 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-10-2019, 05:11 PM
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Stuttering makes me feel so deficient. Like there's this part of me that's supposed to be there and isn't. I was trying to give someone a compliment, it was the least I could do as they were being nice to me, and the words wouldn't come out. The most common one is someone asks me a question and I can barely manage to give them a coherent answer. Of course it also makes me seem stupid in many of the situations.

Because I can't communicate well verbally I often feel more real online. But online "isn't real" in it's own way so neither feel completely real or unreal. I feel like I'm part of humanity but also that I'm not. Like I relate to everyone and no one.
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post #1106 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-10-2019, 07:00 PM
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Never good enough to be a friend.
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post #1107 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-11-2019, 11:21 AM
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So. Much. Worry. I had a stretch of decent days but that won’t be happening again anytime soon. The far too early arrival of snow and cold plus the onslaught of Christmas music = pure misery for me. I cannot handle snow at all. Good thing I am home today and not at work because I am on the verge of a panic attack.


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post #1108 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-11-2019, 08:12 PM
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I'm scared. I'm alone. Nothing ever gets better. I'm exhausted in every possible way. I'm ready to die. There's nothing left.

Now I'm Nothing
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post #1109 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-11-2019, 11:06 PM
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Firm believer in cutting people out my life---especially if they do the same crap over and again and fail to see their ways.

"If you're going through hell, keep going" - Winston Churchill
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post #1110 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-12-2019, 01:50 PM
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Having a crush is a living hell.


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post #1111 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-12-2019, 09:36 PM
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People who can't seem to mind their business and only have rude things to say.

♡ ❤ :: Yesterday's a closing door//You don't live there anymore//Say goodbye to where you've been//And tell your heart to beat again ::♡ ❤



Попроси у облаков
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post #1112 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 01:23 PM
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Why is it that it’s the meanest, selfish and Scrooge-like people that have the most money? Resources are in the wrong people’s hands 😞
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post #1113 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-13-2019, 03:15 PM
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I don't think my therapist is helping. But its too mentally draining to shop around for other therapists.


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post #1114 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-14-2019, 10:13 PM
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I don't belong here but I'm too lazy to try and belong somewhere else. That and I don't know where I'd even try. It doesn't come natural to me. The people thing. Online I'm able to communicate more but people are also more likely to openly be an *******, sometimes for no reason at all. I think about making friends. Then I think what if I put in the effort and they don't like me or it gets messy somehow. I don't even have a life so what would I talk to people about anyways.
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post #1115 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-14-2019, 10:33 PM
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The more awkward I am, the more attention and scrutiny I seem to draw to myself. Which makes me feel even more awkward.
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post #1116 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-17-2019, 12:18 PM
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This feeling of always feeling like i should be doing something i'm not doing. My shrink keeps pressuring me to go meetups and evening classes. I dont really want to but now i feel like i should so every day where i don't go to one i feel like crap.

i dont have motivation to do anything. No motivation to find friends, a partner, a job, to move out, a life...NOTHING! I just feel so blah all the time. I want some inspiration.


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post #1117 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-17-2019, 12:41 PM
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That I would probably screw up any friendships I make.


- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -- - - -- - -- -- - -- - -- - -- - -- - -- - -- - -- - -- - - -- - -- - -- - - -- -- - -- - --
I really have bad days I feel like am alone but it was once worse. I think am making progress and finding my smile back.
What am currently on:
Best Anxiety Program
The link is audios,videos and by that Irish guy Barry McDonagh(one of my favorite Social Anxiety authors ). Sharing is caring.
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post #1118 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-17-2019, 09:42 PM
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Crying with nobody around for support makes me feel so alone. I just want to disappear.

always
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post #1119 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-18-2019, 07:30 PM
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Nothing to look forward to.

Now I'm Nothing
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post #1120 of 1133 (permalink) Old 11-18-2019, 07:52 PM
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This thing says the big rant I dictated out is too long, but I don't feel like paring it down or splitting it up. I guess I will bore my therapist with it later in its more logical and less emotional form.
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