(No Quoting, Only Venting) What’s Bothering You Right Now? - Page 38 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #741 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 02:15 PM
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I’m annoyed I’m in my 30’s and my family don’t respect my decisions. I sometimes feel my life isn’t my own.
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post #742 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-20-2019, 03:47 PM
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I won't let you hurt her again, you don't deserve her and I am not going to let you ruin my life aswell
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post #743 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-21-2019, 05:33 AM
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How in the blind **** do you assume someone is interested in you just because they don't talk as much when you're around? Is it really that easy to mistake someone's complete apathy for you?

If you like someone, fine. But don't start rumors about what you *think* is going on in their head. That makes **** a whole lot worse. Some people really do just want to work and go home. Not relive high school.

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Isn't it a bit early to worry about that at 7 years old?
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I don't believe you at all about the taste. You are vegan anyway, so how would you know what meat tastes like. I get sick of vegans saying it tastes the same and then you bite into it and it's horrible.
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post #744 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-21-2019, 06:51 AM
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My 'personal demons' are what is going to be the end of me. And no, I'm not just talking about depression or anxiety - it's something way deeper than that. It's not going to change. I'd rather be dead.
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post #745 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-21-2019, 08:42 AM
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No one likes me. People suck.
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post #746 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-21-2019, 07:29 PM
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Potentially losing people you care about is never easy
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post #747 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 01:55 AM
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Where do i even begin..lol

I had no advice, no counsel, no encouragement, no consolation, no assistance, no support, of any kind, from anyone, that I can call to mind, as I hope to go to heaven!



-Dickens, David Copperfield
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post #748 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 06:11 AM
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No one likes me. People suck.
I like you. Because that's the chance I start off everyone on. And it helps your username is cute/interesting\quirky. You have to give me reasons or do or say bad things for me to actually dislike you.

You're only saying that because that's what you think people are thinking because you're thinking that of yourself. I mean, people who don't know you couldn't possibly dislike you. They can't. They have nothing to base it on. If some stranger does dislike you and they don't even know you, then it's probably saying more negative about them than it could be about you.

Waiting for a beam to break through here,
A chain-way vision bright and clear.
This must be it,
Longed for Bliss,
First it was so quiet and now I know I am not alone in here.

___________
Ain't nothin' gonna break my stride, nobody gonna slow me down. I gotta keep on moovin!

If you can read this, you must look at my profile page. I like people who have attention to detail, and curiosity.
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post #749 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 06:30 AM
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I'll start working in somewhere in a week and when visited there, I had a feeling, like people working in there hated that place :/. I also don't think that the company's sense of aesthetics fits me but there's nothing I can do about it for now. I hope that at least, I can learn about technical details there. I've heard that the company isn't as bad as I think.

Actually, what is bothering me the most is that people who are less successful at school, now have the chance of working at the biggest companies in here because they have some acquaintances or family members there. It always happens here in any kind of work area and that's really annoying.
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post #750 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 08:54 AM
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Grandpa went from saying, "If they want to fight then bring the fight to me and I'll show them how's it's done" to having no fight left in him at all. We're all exhausted trying to support and be there for him. It's a lot and I hate seeing him like this
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post #751 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 09:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by KILOBRAVO View Post
I like you. Because that's the chance I start off everyone on. And it helps your username is cute/interesting\quirky. You have to give me reasons or do or say bad things for me to actually dislike you.

You're only saying that because that's what you think people are thinking because you're thinking that of yourself. I mean, people who don't know you couldn't possibly dislike you. They can't. They have nothing to base it on. If some stranger does dislike you and they don't even know you, then it's probably saying more negative about them than it could be about you.
Well, thanks. And that does make sense. No one can't not like me if they don't know me or never talk to me.
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post #752 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 09:29 AM
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@CNikki
You can get through this.

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post #753 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 06:56 PM
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So I've had this chair that an ex left at my house over a decade ago and it's been SEVEN years since we've been together. Throughout the years, she's stated that she was intending to pick it up, but nothing ever came of it. To be honest, I've always thought it was something she wanted to keep using as an excuse to see me or something. Near the end of our relationship, she would come over under the guise of "picking up the chair", we'd have sex and she'd leave. So, I must confess I didn't think she ever had any true intention of ever picking the chair up.

Fast forward to about 7 months ago. I'm doing some deep cleaning and really getting rid of the clutter around my room, old things I don't want - removing all the eyesores so to speak. In an inspired moment, I throw out the chair. Honestly, maybe I could have sent her a message to let her know at least it was at the curb, but I took the easy route and said nothing. I didn't feel like holding on to it until god knows when, nor did I really care to see her. She's never been someone who comes and goes easily.

So... She asks me about the chair today and I tell her I threw it out almost a year ago. She goes on this long winded rant about how hurt she is that I would do something like that and starts acting incredibly dramatic... Blah, blah - the usual routine about how she's a victim.

If she really wanted the damn chair, she's had over 2200 days to make an opportunity to come pick it up.

Not sure what the point of this rant is. I'm just glad I rid myself of that disaster relationship when I did. I really don't think she's changed since the day I met her. Cooked.

The world is not my home. I'm just passing through.
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post #754 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 06:58 PM
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post #755 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-22-2019, 09:39 PM
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I don't know where I belong either. I don't fit in with anyone. I feel like a dead man watching the world die. Jealous that they're dying together. When will I live again? Can I live again?
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post #756 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 12:08 AM
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Ideally I won't live past 30. It's kind of pointless when there's no hope because you're an alien.

Some people heard my words and thought it meant they knew me
Truth is, I don't exist, I'm just a soundtrack to your movie
Some background figure in a story that's already scripted
And what I feel's just felt for you to hear me ****ing spit it
I jump in many different heads through these words and poems
Always hoping maybe the next leap'll be my leap home

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post #757 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 05:41 AM
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I have a problem with fine and gross motor skills, which is probably the root cause of my SA and depression.
I feel I might have dyspraxia/ADHD-PI/High functioning autism..I've never been able to interact with people in a 'normal' way..But in India it's difficult to obtain a diagnosis. Doctors are simply not aware of dyspraxia.
Add to that my mom's health issues (schizophrenia), the academic scholarship chances I blew up because of my anxieties about the future, death of a close relative, the general issues a woman has to face in my country..
Overall I just wish I could die soon..but I'm silll fighting on, hoping things can improve..

I had no advice, no counsel, no encouragement, no consolation, no assistance, no support, of any kind, from anyone, that I can call to mind, as I hope to go to heaven!



-Dickens, David Copperfield
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post #758 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 10:25 AM
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I can't do this anymore. I wish I would die.

Now I'm Nothing
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post #759 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 11:30 AM
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post #760 of 1813 (permalink) Old 07-23-2019, 11:40 AM
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I think part of the reason why I have an extra hard time making friends is cause maybe I have paranoid personality disorder. I haven't had friends I hung out with since 5th grade. After 5th grade has just been acquaintances. I mean, I got into a decent amount of trouble in small classes in middle school and made people laugh and stuff but I've been paranoid since then. In HS, I always thought I'd get in trouble for the smallest things. Thats why I was such a goodie two shoes in HS. :/ Its not good to be bad but acting like I'll get in trouble for the smallest things, no wonder that sorta traumatized me for life. Still feel like this at work and where I live and with my parents. I'll always have that for the rest of my life. But I mean my dad did choke me once, so why would I not be paranoid? He's changed over the past few years but I'll always be paranoid. How should I act around him? What should I say?

And I've been told to my face that I'll get beat up if I dont obey a rule. So yea. No wonder I always feel like I have to obey, obey, obey. :/ Still trying to slowly get over it.
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