(No Quoting, Only Venting) What’s Bothering You Right Now? - Page 31 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #601 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-17-2019, 03:36 AM
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Everyone has forgotten I exist.

An actual suffering strengthens,
As sinews do, with age.
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post #602 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 11:24 AM
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I am just an afterthought. I am mostly ignored, pushed aside or just straight up forgotten about. Small things add up and there have been many lately. I honestly don’t know why I bother anymore and I wish I had the strength to just quit my job and move to the one place I actually enjoy being in.


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post #603 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 12:03 PM
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I knew this city was sort of bad. Just saw something that confirmed it. I knew this whole time. Honestly, not sure how I feel about it. One day I'll move to a better part of this area. It just takes time.
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post #604 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 12:20 PM
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Ive been hurt in the past. Everyone is just so preoccupied with status. It makes me reel.

Our hopes and expectations. Black holes and revelations.
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post #605 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 01:28 PM
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life is ****. also unfortunate coincidences all the time.
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post #606 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 03:58 PM
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There certainly are a lot of douchebags in the world.

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post #607 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 04:44 PM
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my middle brother called me (which is pretty awkward in itself) to tell me my eldest brother died. we weren't very close... the whole people dying thing makes me feel pretty confused/awkward. don't really have much info about what happened. anyway I'm pretty sure I dont feel how I'm supposed to feel, etc.

"I take what is mine. I pay the iron price."
―Balon Greyjoy
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post #608 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 09:45 PM
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I just realized that I could die tomorrow and no one except my mother (along with some acquaintances from my volunteer positions) would know about my passing. Pretty sad when you think about it.

"Drifting and autocross is for the weak. We only do maximum velocity." - Unknown

"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it." - Aristotle
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post #609 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-18-2019, 09:56 PM
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I’m sick of my family & this city, I truly want nothing much to do with either. The grass ain’t greener it’s just different and what I wouldn’t give for that difference from this moment forward
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post #610 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 01:24 PM
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Kinda glad some things have happened. Kinda not some other things. I'm just happy to being away from it all. I think things have been taken out of proportion and made worse to look than they actually are. I'll take a step back. Happy that wasn't what it was though, geez.

I just want to go home. Fill the void. Do something with my life. I'm being held back too much, I need freedom. Always have.

Our hopes and expectations. Black holes and revelations.
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post #611 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 02:42 PM
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At this point I believe my bank is refusing to cooperate with me. How long are you going to keep going on with the waiting game? I go up there three times asking about my debit card just for them to tell me they reissued it on June 13th. Yet, the last time they to me to wait 4 to 5 days. I go up there today just for them to say I haven't waited long enough. Then the woman says I've been waiting patiently. Yea, really? :/ Apparently my lot number wasn't on the address because my address was too long? How does this make any sense! They refuse to send it to me through the PO box and I can't get it sent to the bank. What is going on? I can't wrap my head around this. I might be switching banks soon. I told them to cancel the card and they wouldn't cancel it. It's as if I don't exist. I might as well not.
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post #612 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 03:21 PM
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I really wish to go back a year or two and at least change a few things to keep what spark that ignited within me that hadn't occurred in a long time.. I felt like I mattered. I felt like there were actually people in my life that were true to me. I felt things that I never thought were possible nor that I deserved. Now it's back to the endless void, only that I have experienced what it's like 'on the other side' and it just hurts even more. I don't think there's a way out this time.
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post #613 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 03:45 PM
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...oops

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post #614 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 03:53 PM
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I mean how much worse can it get when you wait to enter a shop till everybody else is out because you're afraid to open your mouth in front of others pffff
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post #615 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 04:31 PM
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Always falling for the wrong people and wasting my time. I'm always gonna single and alone. Tired of being a backup or second best too but mostly I'm tired of being hurt. Life is just crappy situation after crappy situation for me. I don't know what to do anymore. Also got no one left to talk to about anything 😞

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post #616 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-19-2019, 06:56 PM
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Everyone tells me to leave well enough alone. I will, I know it's for the best. There are things I wish I could just say, but even if we did clear the air or called each other out on our unhealthy behavior, in the end it won't be constructive. It wouldn't change that it's over and we can't even be friends. It wouldn't change why it ended. I don't trust or believe them, they don't trust or believe me, it will turn into a blame game and closure wouldn't be achieved. The only person who can give you closure is yourself through time and space. Just have to take your lessons, better yourself, and do your best to move on.

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I said it was grieving, you said it don't feel nothing
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post #617 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-20-2019, 05:57 AM
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I live in an absolutely miserable place that is depressing, sad and soul crushing. Each day gets worse and worse and the people who run this state are awful. I want to leave. I need to leave. I have to leave. I even know exactly where I want to go. But I can’t do it for several reasons and that is tearing me apart inside and preventing me from making any sort of progress on other things.


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post #618 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-20-2019, 07:39 AM
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Over it already.

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post #619 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-20-2019, 07:54 AM
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Bored

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post #620 of 736 (permalink) Old 06-20-2019, 09:45 AM
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Haha. Starting to believe I am cursed. I tried logging into my account for the doctor cause I got a notice and it said invalid username. I double checked my email everytime to make sure it was the right email and I was given a temporary password so used that, too. It wouldn't take it. I tried 4 times. Then tried typing in the NEW verification code and STILL said invalid. The username is obviously right cause it's just my email. Cant do it too many times or it'll lock me out. Even asked my seafood manager what she thinks is going on and she asked in a serious tone are you cursed. She said I know you aren't really but then said it seems like it. OMG.
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