My hustand doesn't understand my pain - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 07:12 PM Thread Starter
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Next time you see him kick him in the nutsack hard, and say this is what life does to me everyday man :/
I've been mean to my guy man lately


I told him he's a mommas boy he needs to grow a spine and make him feel like he's the one who doesn't care


He really is a Damn angel who doesn't see n it sucks. Everyone loves him. Never met anyone who disliked him. He has sa. So it goes well our relationship

But everyone sees me as this weirdo. Life's screws when ur hubby can't see.


I'd leave happy threads if life changes

I'm at this f my mother in law point too...
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post #22 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 07:40 PM
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He should he's a real guy



I don't want to lose him I'm just fed up of no one understanding me. After all that's what every female needs.





I'm not lucky but I do have him

I'm sure that he has good qualities to him. You two have been together for a number of years. Perhaps he'll realize how you feel at some point and adjust his course.

Maybe he does understand you but he's caught between his mother and you. Your brother doesn't seem to be helping things. I still wonder if you and your husband had some independence if things would be different.
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post #23 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 07:59 PM Thread Starter
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I'm sure that he has good qualities to him. You two have been together for a number of years. Perhaps he'll realize how you feel at some point and adjust his course.

Maybe he does understand you but he's caught between his mother and you. Your brother doesn't seem to be helping things. I still wonder if you and your husband had some independence if things would be different.
i wonder too but we're young and live with his mom still, although he and his brother basically ran the house. my brother in law is ok, his wife was rude and the other bro is messed, and hubbies sisters aren't kind. basically, worst is maa there, and my own mother is useless, friends don't know so i come to SAS.

u don't have to read this, but this is what happened to my bro:

bro is spineless. his wife will divorce him soon, she already told me 3 days ago, she said this 1st time she came into our house, and she hates America for no reason (she's Pakistani), he had a love marriage, he's her dog, sorry to say but it is the truth of my brother now. he ran away for 5 days and got 2 tattoo's. in my culture u don't just go do that easily, he was in the hospital. he doesn't realize his wife, HATES HATES us. i give him a year left of marriage. unfortunately she got the kid out of him, thinking he might stay with her. he would, but she's SO mentally unstable it's sad. she's a real nut. she hates me too, i'm pretty friendly tho.

well, hubby is blind to all issues. i see, and when i say i'm wrong. it's all crazy in my world...
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post #24 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:03 PM
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i wonder too but we're young and live with his mom still, although he and his brother basically ran the house. my brother in law is ok, his wife was rude and the other bro is messed, and hubbies sisters aren't kind. basically, worst is maa there, and my own mother is useless, friends don't understand

bro is spineless. his wife will divorce him soon, she already told me 3 days ago, she said this 1st time she came into our house, and she hates America for no reason (she's Pakistani), he had a love marriage, he's her dog, sorry to say but it is the truth of my brother now.

hubby is blind to all issues.

i see, and when i say i'm wrong. it's all crazy in my world...

Hubby might see the issues but realize that now isn't the time to speak up. If you're living with his Mom, it probably makes sense not to upset her. It's important to keep peace of sorts under the roof. I'm not saying that he should ignore the problem (or ignore you). I do understand the challenges of the situation.

It seems like things are about to get rough for your brother. Not good.
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post #25 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:07 PM
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u don't have to read this, but this is what happened to my bro:

I read it. This seems like bad news for everyone involved. If there is a child, that's a situation that will affect someone who is innocent. Adults make decisions. Children get caught in the middle.
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post #26 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:07 PM Thread Starter
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Hubby might see the issues but realize that now isn't the time to speak up. If you're living with his Mom, it probably makes sense not to upset her. It's important to keep peace of sorts under the roof. I'm not saying that he should ignore the problem (or ignore you). I do understand the challenges of the situation.

It seems like things are about to get rough for your brother. Not good.
ya my whole family is basically screwd up, my mom works like a dog, and has paranoid personality disorder, i feel like. she's not diagnosed, but she claims she has anxiety, my dad idk if he did, but he was insecure too...


i wouldn't say it to my mother in law, my hubby isn't supportive, and that's creating distances... it's bad.
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post #27 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:09 PM Thread Starter
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I read it. This seems like bad news for everyone involved. If there is a child, that's a situation that will affect someone who is innocent. Adults make decisions. Children get caught in the middle.
ya the boy just make it to 2 weeks today, he's real cute and it's the 1st baby in our family but... his wife, already wants to go Pakistan. i do hope the boy doesn't experience pain.... he might, his parents just don't get along, luckily my brother functions better than me, i believe it will be ok
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post #28 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:10 PM
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ya my whole family is basically screwd up, my mom works like a dog, and has paranoid personality disorder, i feel like. she's not diagnosed, but she claims she has anxiety, my dad idk if he did, but he was insecure too...





i wouldn't say it to my mother in law, my hubby isn't supportive, and that's creating distances... it's bad.

It's even tougher when everyone is 'trapped' under the same roof or nearby. Nobody has breathing room. It's a situation that's tough to deal with and even tougher in close quarters.
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post #29 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:13 PM
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ya the boy just make it to 2 weeks today, he's real cute and it's the 1st baby in our family but... his wife, already wants to go Pakistan. i do hope the boy doesn't experience pain.... he might, his parents just don't get along, luckily my brother functions better than me, he'll do fine.

I wish he and his wife could work things out for the sake of the baby. Or at least stay reasonably close if they do break up to make it easier for the child. Perhaps the wife should have done some homework before moving. It can be difficult to move from city to city. Moving outside the country has to be tough.
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post #30 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:14 PM Thread Starter
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It's even tougher when everyone is 'trapped' under the same roof or nearby. Nobody has breathing room. It's a situation that's tough to deal with and even tougher in close quarters.
ya.... everything is bad. the thing is i don't give my mother in law a reason to complain, she complains at the other girl.

it's not her that doesn't get all this, it's just my guy. he doesn't see, i told him that i don't want to talk to him about personal things no longer till he gets me.
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post #31 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:15 PM
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I think living with in-laws isn't an ideal situation for anyone, can you and your husband afford your own place or will you be able to afford it in the future?
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post #32 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:16 PM Thread Starter
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I wish he and his wife could work things out for the sake of the baby. Or at least stay reasonably close if they do break up to make it easier for the child. Perhaps the wife should have done some homework before moving. It can be difficult to move from city to city. Moving outside the country has to be tough.
she's not really stable. i've seen this girl pulling her hair going nuts before.... she's well liked,

and kinda evil. for example, she didn't attend my aunts recent funeral, but took the baby to target for 5 hours the next day. it's just something i was confused at. not to mention she bullied me for a year... my mom was shocked i put up with her.
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post #33 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:17 PM Thread Starter
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I think living with in-laws isn't an ideal situation for anyone, can you and your husband afford your own place or will you be able to afford it in the future?
this is probably my only option. i might tell him more that we need to move out, i don't see it happening for 3 more years. so i have to put up with A lot.
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post #34 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:18 PM
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ya.... everything is bad. the thing is i don't give my mother in law a reason to complain, she complains at the other girl.



it's not her that doesn't get all this, it's just my guy. he doesn't see, i told him that i don't want to talk to him about personal things no longer till he gets me.

I think he gets you. Four years is a long time to be together. He just might realize that now is not the time to make things more difficult in the house. If he upsets his Mom, that could get ugly. Unfortunately, that means you are on the other end. I hope both of you are saving some money so you can gain your independence. Even a cheap place on Craigslist might help.
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post #35 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:19 PM Thread Starter
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I think he gets you. Four years is a long time to be together. He just might realize that now is not the time to make things more difficult in the house. If he upsets his Mom, that could get ugly. Unfortunately, that means you are on the other end. I hope both of you are saving some money so you can gain your independence. Even a cheap place on Craigslist might help.
thanks for knocking some sense into my confusion tho.

it puts things into perspective, really.
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post #36 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:20 PM
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she's not really stable. i've seen this girl pulling her hair going nuts before.... she's well liked,



and kinda evil. for example, she didn't attend my aunts recent funeral, but took the baby to target for 5 hours the next day. it's just something i was confused at. not to mention she bullied me for a year... my mom was shocked i put up with her.

Target for 5 hours? That's... different. I could cover a whole mall in less time. it sounds like she has problems that aren't being addressed. I empathize with her while at the same time I think she knows right vs wrong.
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post #37 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:22 PM
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thanks for knocking some sense into my confusion tho.



it puts things into perspective, really.

I've had to play peacemaker before. In a different type of situation. It's a difficult spot to be in and somebody often gets the short end of the stick.
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post #38 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:22 PM Thread Starter
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Target for 5 hours? That's... different. I could cover a whole mall in less time. it sounds like she has problems that aren't being addressed. I empathize with her while at the same time I think she knows right vs wrong.
haha well i actually don't know where they went but bro said it was target.

i'm not sure, maybe she's right. what do u think i should do about her, since u know this much now? lol, cause i'm kinda not a fond of my sister in law, who i view as a bully.
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post #39 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:23 PM Thread Starter
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I've had to play peacemaker before. In a different type of situation. It's a difficult spot to be in and somebody often gets the short end of the stick.
ya i noticed. i like that term peacemaker

doesn't make my position sound as lousy! haha.
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post #40 of 51 (permalink) Old 12-01-2015, 08:26 PM
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haha well i actually don't know where they went but bro said it was target.



i'm not sure, maybe she's right. what do u think i should do about her, since u know this much now? lol, cause i'm kinda not a fond of my sister in law, who i view as a bully.

In the interest of peace, you might have to play nice. It seems like there are enough challenges at the moment. Your husband seems to be trying to keep peace. It's probably a good idea to do the same. This is a temporary situation which will end one way or another. Either she'll leave or, in a few years, you and your husband will leave. Same result in the end.
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