lonely and depressed - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-07-2009, 09:32 PM Thread Starter
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lonely and depressed


hi everyone. I just registered. I just got dumped by a guy I didn't even really like and yet I'm very sad and depressed now. I think it has less to do with him and more to do with being alone. It just feels like it confirms that I am an unlovable person. It probably wouldn't bother me at all if I had some sort of social life. I have a friend I see at work and my cat. I didn't have anyone to call to talk to, so I thought I'd post it here.
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-07-2009, 11:10 PM
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I'm sorry about the guy; getting dumped is never fun, even if it is a loveless relationship. He probably sensed that you weren't really into him. I find that boyfriends/girlfriends take up A LOT of time, so maybe now's your chance to work on your social life? You need to be strong on your own before you can have a healthy relationship.

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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-07-2009, 11:12 PM
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Virtual hugs from everyone! I'll go first: hug.
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-07-2009, 11:13 PM
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If you didn't like him, then you are probably happier without him.
This is your chance to work on yourself free from relationship distraction.
Being single can be a positive thing. Learning to love yourself for you is the first step. As you develop yourself, your outlook in relationships improve .

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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-08-2009, 05:12 AM
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Ive had that happen to me too. Thought id be happy to be out of the relationship but yet for some reason still felt depressed. The good news is it doesnt feel nearly as bad as being dumped by someone you are really in love with.
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-10-2009, 07:33 PM Thread Starter
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thanks. you all are probably right. i do need to spend time working on myself. I don't think things like this would be as upsetting if I had a social group for support. i guess i do on here. i'm going to school online, so this does free up some time for me to work on that more. It's been a couple of days now, and I'm starting to feel a little better about it. It's still sad to be lonely on the holidays. I got my cat though.
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-10-2009, 10:22 PM
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I'm sorry. Just be thankful you didn't fall in love and then get dumped. If you can freely admit you didn't like him, then it was a good thing that happened. I know it sucks to feel lonely and isolated, but you have to keep yourself happy any way you can. Feeling hopeless and ruminating over failures only causes a downward spiral. Look for things that make you happy, and if you can't find anything, keep looking anyway because they're always out there.

"Every day is Like Sunday,
Every day is silent and gray" - Morrissey
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 11-11-2009, 08:08 AM
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Happened to me too. I was glad it was over because I knew all along that he didn't care a s**t about me at all. But when it all ended I was back to nothing and the void started to fill in. It's the loneliness that gets you. No matter how bad it was, he kept a missing place in your life which needs to be filled. What I did was to occupy myself with other stuff until I felt good again. This feeling will go off don't worry. You just need some time so try and keep yourself busy with something else until you are completely over him
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