I'm such a plain person - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 3 (permalink) Old 09-06-2019, 12:55 PM Thread Starter
nikiiiii45
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 2

I'm such a plain person


Hi everyone, I'm new to this forum. I just wanted a place to vent and maybe someone would read it.

I'm a 21 year old college girl with social anxiety. First off I want to say that I feel like the past few months have been a time of tremendous progress I feel like I can talk to people I don't know without blushing or blanking out. I feel like I can hold conversation, if I ever get the opportunity. People describe me as shy, that's about it.

Lately I just feel hopeless because I've made more effort to put myself out there but no one really sticks. We can talk when we are around each other, but that's about it- it doesn't develop into personal relationship. I feel like I have no real hobbies to truly bond with people, there aren't any clubs at my school that are willing to teach new stuff (animation club, screenwriting club)- all the students are already very involved and know their stuff. It's more of a networking thing for them.

I think I'm too introspective, and might come off as too intense, and it puts people off. I just generally don't know what to talk about. I'm really into music, I guess, but don't play any instruments. I honestly have only made one friend in my time at college so far-- and he was a guy friend who had the same music taste and humor but couldn't be really good friends since I had a bf at the time, didn't want to make my bf uncomfortable.

What is the secret? It seems like people will still make friends in classrooms where we don't even get a chance to talk. I truly feel like I'm missing out on life and my young years. I just bought two concerts tickets but don't know who I'm going with. I have a couple of friends but recently they've been taking advantage of my kindness...I'm just so frustrated. I want to do more.
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post #2 of 3 (permalink) Old 09-06-2019, 11:25 PM
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Entrensik's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2014
Location: Colorado
Gender: Male
Age: 23
Posts: 1,477
My Mood: Cold
First of all welcome to SAS

I don't know if I can help you make more friends but I do know one thing, what people care about the most is how you make then feel. If you can combine that with a few commonalities im sure you can make at least one really good friend.

I guess what im saying is that you should put more focus on being the best version of yourself around others then on what you do or what your interested in.

From what I've seen most group conversations are about nothing really but yet people are always laughing and what not. Emotions over logic. Remember that .


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Live for the progress that you've made.
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post #3 of 3 (permalink) Old 09-07-2019, 07:45 AM Thread Starter
nikiiiii45
 
Join Date: Sep 2019
Posts: 2
Thanks for the welcome and advice I think I'm a bit over-logical and forget that people have emotions haha. This was really helpful actually, thank you
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