I keep getting told I'm quiet by my coworkers!! I'm so slow - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 05:41 PM Thread Starter
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I keep getting told I'm quiet by my coworkers!! I'm so slow


This is so humiliating. I try my best to say "Good morning" then "Goodbye/Have a good day" EVERY DAY. But it's not enough. I don't make small talk or chit chat. My supervisor is constantly disappointed and frustrated with me, I can tell. I desperately wish I could just be normal for once!!!

People always make jokes about my quietness. One coworker was like "you gotta control her, she's way too loud" to my supervisor (obviously as a joke because I almost never say a word), then she's like "ahhh I know", almost like if she regretted agreeing to hire me.

I was expected to be a high performing and productive worker but i'm failing to meet up to the expectations and it's so stressful. Next week I'm supposed to do a huge network consolidation and I have zero experience with that.

It's my first week but still, with my degree I should've known more but it didn't really prepare me! So far I haven't been able to accomplish most tasks without supervision. This is so bad.
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post #2 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 05:52 PM
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As a fellow socially anxious introvert, I've noticed people tend to find us more interesting and
mysterious--not to mention authentic. They're just trying to connect with you.

I know you feel unprepared but you're still very young. Don't worry, you'll eventually get up to speed. It's never easy in the beginning!
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post #3 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 06:30 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CerealKiller View Post
As a fellow socially anxious introvert, I've noticed people tend to find us more interesting and
mysterious--not to mention authentic. They're just trying to connect with you.

I know you feel unprepared but you're still very young. Don't worry, you'll eventually get up to speed. It's never easy in the beginning!
It was like that at the beginning but now they’re actively starting to dislike me. This happens in EVERY job. Apparently I’m rude because I don’t make enough small talk! God I wonder how the normal people can banter and fake laugh so well. It blows my mind how they’re able to come up with some good conversations on the spot and it isn’t hard for them at all!!!

The worst part is I CANNOT USE ANY DRUGS OR ALCOHOL. I have a drug test coming up soon I’m sure about that, and I think I’ll be randomly drug tested as well. There goes my clutch.

I just want to apologize to my supervisor for my entire existence and hide in a hole for the rest of my life.
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post #4 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 06:49 PM
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When someone talks **** about you like in joke form you should speak up and ask why they are bullying you. It's so horrible when people speak rudely about us out loud in our face, it's like thanks for that as though my own thoughts aren't enough. And even worse people like this are praised in the workplace as if it's a good attitude to have. Gross! Hey, I like your avatar, that's how I feel all the time. Next time you should tell them how loud you are in bed. It's sad when other people try to make us who we are not, and when we can't be they like to bully us. And we are quiet either way and they get away with behaving like huge arseholes. God forbid if we start a fight or try to defend ourselves we get fired. I hate people, I really do! Life is so unfair!

I think you're more able to supervise and do your work than they are. But it seems in today's society, their bullying attitudes are much more praised and trendy than our quiet and polite demeanor. My! Who knew acting like a ***** could get you on top so fast! I thought you had to be a good person to get anywhere in life, seems I was wrong! Bad people and jerks live great lives! Don't give up on your work because of them, they're just normies who are known for molding and shaping others to what they are and like. Be yourself, and if they fire you then you can sue their asses! When they talk about you and make jokes, I think they're actually trying to push you out to be different because they're uncomfortable with you. They're just like everyone else in today's society, at work or in school everyone is pushing to make an extrovert out of you! And they bully introverts as if something is wrong with us! This shouldn't be happening in the workplace or anywhere, there should be personality equality and freedom!

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post #5 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 07:01 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lonewoman View Post
It was like that at the beginning but now they’re actively starting to dislike me. This happens in EVERY job. Apparently I’m rude because I don’t make enough small talk! God I wonder how the normal people can banter and fake laugh so well. It blows my mind how they’re able to come up with some good conversations on the spot and it isn’t hard for them at all!!!

The worst part is I CANNOT USE ANY DRUGS OR ALCOHOL. I have a drug test coming up soon I’m sure about that, and I think I’ll be randomly drug tested as well. There goes my clutch.

I just want to apologize to my supervisor for my entire existence and hide in a hole for the rest of my life.
NEVER USE DRUGS OR ALCOHOL--no one or job is worth damaging your mind for. I doubt they dislike you as much as you think. I wouldn't be surprised if they secretly hated each other for being phony. But, if it really bothers you, tell your supervisor that you're shy but you wanted him/her and the team to know that you're very fond of them all--you're just a naturally a quiet person and will always be and you hope they can accept you for it. Introverts have a part in corporate culture too. People value us for being authentic and unlike everyone else.
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post #6 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 08:32 PM
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I just ignore them. I too get told I'm quiet and honestly I just embrace it. If you try to act all social and people like it how long can you keep that up? Just be you, if it's a job that doesn't require you to be social you have nothing to worry about. Eventually they'll be tired of using the same stupid jokes about how quiet you are and they'll just accept it and accept you. You tried to make them happy and that failed so why give them more? Focus on your work and ignore the coworkers, I know that's not what you would want to hear but unfortunatly there's not really another option that's based in reality.

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post #7 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 09:10 PM
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Girl. Them not liking you is just in your head. They’re joking around! The “ahh that’s true” from your boss was a joke! She was being sarcastic! They’re making jokes and they probably don’t know they’re hurting your feelings. Don’t worry about it!!! You are FINE! If you are quiet, there’s nothing wrong with that!! Don’t be ashamed of being quiet if you’re comfortable doing so! Your coworkers not liking you is just an illusion created by your anxiety. Don’t let it get in your way!
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post #8 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-15-2018, 09:11 PM
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You are probably amazing! Don’t feel bad about yourself. You are probably really nice. Don’t let what other people think of you get in your way! They don’t hate you, and they probably think you’re great!
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post #9 of 9 (permalink) Old 06-17-2018, 09:13 PM
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your co-workers are *******s. you've only been there for a week, what do they expect? god.
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