I dont know if this is SA but... - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-24-2011, 02:38 PM Thread Starter
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I dont know if this is SA but...


I dont even know what to do anymore. The thing is, i have friends, i have no problem talking to poeple and making new friends and overall, i think my life is great. But the things is, i am OVERLY sensitive to things, and i always think that negative things are directed to me. Usually its over the most trivial things too. For example, if a friend doesnt reply to a text after a little while, i begin to think that i have done something to make them angry at me, whn in reality, i havent.

Another thing is, i have a firend. Hes kinda in the "popular" group, i kind of am too. But for some reason i feel the need to make everyone, including him, happy, even though most of the time ihe is a complete ahole. Any time he teases me, i dont know weather to take it a s a joke or literally. This must sound pretty stupid but i didnt know where else to rant about this =\
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post #2 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-24-2011, 03:28 PM
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I would definitely consider this social anxiety. Though there are different levels of social anxiety what you are going through, scrutinizing over how someone feels about you, perhaps how you dealt with a situation, worrying when someone doesn't text you right back (I do this all this time), I'd consider it social anxiety. I'm the same way about making people happy. Even people I dislike I want to make happy. I'm not a very confrontational person.

Though I can't relate to hanging out the popular crowd, I know how you feel in the way of constantly worrying. It can be a struggle when you seek out reasons to worry but not knowing it. You're amongst friends here. I for one will be happy to listen and give any advice I can, and I'm sure others will as well.
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post #3 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-24-2011, 04:41 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks, its good to know that im not alone, i really just have no idea how to deal with this though...
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post #4 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-24-2011, 04:56 PM
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When it comes to dealing with texts, its important to remember that whatever the person you're texting with is doing, it might be two things at once. Perhaps he had to turn the phone off to be polite to someone else, perhaps he had to put the phone away, perhaps he's driving and has to wait until he's pulled to traffic light or parked the car. There's so many more reasons why someone wouldn't respond immediately to a text. But chances are, at any given moment that friend is going out of their way to text you back and so occasionally have to take a break so they can resume what they're doing on occasion. While I may, for instance, being solely caught up in texting someone there's no telling what's going to happen at any given moment on their end. They could bump into an old friend, have to drive somewhere, being carrying more than two things and have to temporarily put away the phone. You never really know and shouldn't assume you're the first reason they didn't respond when there's so many more reasons. Finding something for yourself to do in addition to texting can help with this problem as well.

As far as your friend who may be an a-hole, depending on his mood, firstly, don't blame yourself for his behavior, and if you have to offer some sort of emotional response keep it cryptic and, I'd suggest, subtle so he isn't quick to take it the wrong way. If you don't know what he's thinking maybe its safer he doesn't know what you're thinking. Just a suggestion.
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post #5 of 5 (permalink) Old 01-24-2011, 07:33 PM Thread Starter
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Thanks for the advice, it makes me feel a little better. But the little things still really bother me, like its unreal the way it bothers me. Im just afraid to do anything in case i might piss someone off, i dont know if now its just a case of low self confidence but....
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