I go to such extremes because that's what I'm witnessing happening to just about everyone around me. I'm afraid of being consumed by the American dream, and I'm afraid of being trapped in a situation where I'm stuck working my life away to support others. I'm afraid that any kind of vitality I have will be sold off to whoever will give me the money to pay the bills. And I'm afraid of having my time taken away from me by everybody.
I'm also afraid of breaking down and accepting some foundational "why" to the way I look at things, never again to question why I've chosen that "why." I'm afraid of being stuck in existential limbo as I toil my life away to buy a lot of stupid sh-t that will ultimately make me feel dead inside, only to wish later on on my death bed that I had killed myself long ago.
I go to such extremes mostly because I'm afraid of losing control of where my life is heading. I don't want to get lost in the everyday humdrum, and consequently having little to no time to continually analyze myself, the meaning of life, and enjoying different things.
I actually completely understand this point of view. I'm currently a freelance writer, which is what I love to do. But since I'm also currently pretty much just barely scraping by, the threat of having to get some mind-numbing job is ever-present. Basically, I'd be scared of being in a situation where I'm constantly just making enough money to pay the rent, though, rather than a situation where I'm always buying extreme amounts of stuff. I've just never had the urge to be materialistic. And I think it's also due to the people that I've surrounded myself with. Some might look at them as slightly 'hippy-ish' in the fact that materialism really comes second to living 'well.' (Or, how we deem well.)
Anyway, the fact that you are so aware of the potential to be caught up in the trappings of materialism, means that likely you will not be caught. Even if you were to find yourself in a job you hate, there are options.
I think it's interesting that you view having a family as something of a burden. Again, I've had these feelings before in the past as well. Likely, because of the way I've seen others act and talk about all they've had to sacrifice in order to have kids. But now, I see alot of really happy, really successful (on their own terms), and really vivacious people with families, so I'm thinking someday that might not be so bad. Don't get me wrong; It does not matters if you want a family or not. But I just think it's interesting that you have such an extreme view in that respect.
On a positive note, I really like the following turn of phrase: "I'm afraid that any kind of vitality I have will be sold off to whoever will give me the money to pay the bills." Nicely written.