I don't know what to do, my mom is driving me crazy
So my mom gets really angry especially at night. She never eats dinner with my dad and I, she won't even be in the same room when we eat. If she is she starts fussing to herself and leaves. (I usually just eat in a hurry so I can get done before she starts fussing. Or else I just eat dinner before my dad gets out of she shower, and then I wash my dishes and leave the rest out for him to get his plate later.) So tonight my dad and I were eating at the table and she comes in and asks if we're through and starts grabbing at everything and sticking it in the fridge all in a hurry. She said "I just want to sit down." I wanted to say, "well if you'd wait a minute and give me time to finish eating, I can clean up." But I didn't. I was finished eating, so I took my dishes and started washing them in the sink. She threw the garlic bread near me and it landed in the sink and it got wet. I just moved it and kept washing my dishes and she was like "oh, whoops" and threw it away.
I could feel the tension, so I just went to my room. I could hear banging dishes and spoons scraping at bowls and cabinet doors and drawers slamming. When it was over and my dad finished eating and left, I just went in the kitchen and said "was that really necessary?" and she just stormed outside.
I'm so sick of this, it's utterly ridiculous. Why does she act like this? I am perfectly capable of putting the leftover food in the refrigerator and washing the dishes. Usually I do it halfway through eating anyway, so she won't come in and start her slamming and craziness.
She slams cabinets and drawers. She also keeps stomping around the house. I heard it just now STOMP, STOMP, STOMP on the floor. Sometimes I'll be in bed and I can hear her come down the hall and bang on the vent outside my room.
Is this really normal behavior? I don't get it, but I know it is partly to cause for my anxiety issues. I've been dealing with this basically for years now, but it seems to be getting worse. I used to blame myself for it all because it made me feel better to feel guilty for it. Is there something I can do for this? I feel like it's far too little too late to do anything now.
I also feel bad that I don't feel love and try to act in love. But I really have no idea what to do other than do things before she gets to it. But even if I try to do anything, it's never enough. She just finds something else to do and makes a lot of noise doing it.
Underneath the cold November sky, I wait for you... As the pages of my life roll by, I wait for you... I'm so desperate just to see your face, meet me in this broken place...
Be a little brave for a little bit of time.