Currently Broken
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Florida
Gender: Female
Age: 34
Posts: 1,231
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How people react when you don't talk enough
I don't know how many times I have been hanging out with people that I don't really know, trying to make some new friends and have a good time, when people say things like:
"Wow, you don't talk very much, talk more."
"What, are you shy or something?"
"This girl over here won't shut up! Stop talking so much" (sarcasm, of course)
It really pisses me off, because they are just making the situation worse. Why do people feel so threatened by this? Usually people say stuff like this to me just when I am having fun and actually feeling like I am talking more than I normally would. I am feeling proud and they go and completely ruin it and make it impossible for me to say another word.
"Wow, you don't talk very much, talk more."
"What, are you shy or something?"
"This girl over here won't shut up! Stop talking so much" (sarcasm, of course)
It really pisses me off, because they are just making the situation worse. Why do people feel so threatened by this? Usually people say stuff like this to me just when I am having fun and actually feeling like I am talking more than I normally would. I am feeling proud and they go and completely ruin it and make it impossible for me to say another word.
Courage is fear holding on a minute longer. ~George Smith Patton
A neurotic is a man who builds a castle in the air. A psychotic is the man who lives in it. A psychiatrist is the man who collects the rent. ~Jerome Lawrence
The better I get to know men, the more I find myself loving dogs. ~Charles de Gaulle
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Join Date: Nov 2005
Posts: 72
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
Yeah I can relate to this, the sarcastic comment especially rings a few bells for me. I guess they arent being nasty, it's just they're a little bit insensitive and think that by making a joke of it or by bringing it to your attention that will somehow get you to open up. Of course it just makes it worse.
SAS Member
Join Date: May 2008
Location: My World
Gender: Female
Age: 30
Posts: 289
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
Yeah my doctor said that to me one time. Something about stop talking so much. He got a good laugh out of it.
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Spread Your Wings
Join Date: Sep 2008
Location: Somewhere
Posts: 1,512
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
I hate the phrase 'why you so quiet' DUH, what's your business anyways!
Living is easy with eyes closed
Misunderstanding all you see
It's getting hard to be someone
But it all works out
It doesn't matter much to me
Let me take you down
'Cause i'm going to strawberry fields...
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 1,521
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
I HATE it when people do this. It only makes the situation worse for me. And I especially hate when people ask WHY I am so quiet. How the hell am I supposed to respond to that? 
SAS Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Gender: Male
Age: 42
Posts: 31,307
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Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
It's just a dumb thing social people say because they feel unsure about quiet people.
Join Date: Oct 2008
Posts: 6
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
Most 'normal' people think this crap will bring you out of your shell 
it doesn't occur to them what pratts we think they are! 
My tutor picked me out the other day as I was sat at the back in a lecture, the whole class had to 'psst!' with their teeth! (don't ask
) So about 60 people turned to look at me 'psst!' 
and then he says "I can't hear you, Louder!" so I had to do it about three times! I was so embarrased! 
That is the worst thing you can do to someone shy/anxious, you just get defensive and I wanted to flatten him!
it doesn't occur to them what pratts we think they are! My tutor picked me out the other day as I was sat at the back in a lecture, the whole class had to 'psst!' with their teeth! (don't ask
) So about 60 people turned to look at me 'psst!' and then he says "I can't hear you, Louder!" so I had to do it about three times! I was so embarrased! That is the worst thing you can do to someone shy/anxious, you just get defensive and I wanted to flatten him!
SAS Member
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: New Jersey
Gender: Female
Age: 34
Posts: 889
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
Yeah, I know exactly how you feel. It's kind of hard to believe that there are people out there who have so little self-awareness that they don't realize how rude those sorts of comments are. Not to sound overly cynical or anything, but I think maybe some people just see an easy target and enjoy having the opportunity to embarrass someone. Maybe it makes them feel better about themselves, like singling you out somehow makes them feel closer to the rest of the group.
A cynic is a man who knows the price of everything and the value of nothing. - Oscar Wilde
subtastic
Join Date: Jan 2004
Gender: Female
Posts: 7,692
Re: How people react when you don't talk enough
Ditto, quietgal.
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