it depends on your relationship. my whole family is so distant and emotionally not there.
i cant discuss anything with my dad. I have almost zero interest and he has almost zero interest. the last time he called me he went on and on about irrelevant details of his life, rambling because he's old and lonely I guess. maybe that was a year ago. he texts or I text him maybe once every couple of months. and he basically likes my other brother a lot more than me so...
my mum is also dead but we couldn't talk about anything. I tried to get her to teach me to sew once but she has no patience. she went for walks with me when I started therapy back when i was anxious about kind of everything but that lasted maybe almost a month and then she was like what am I meant to hold your hand forever and stopped doing that.
it doesn't really upset me that we're distant. it's not what a family ought to be but bleh. that's the way it is. my brother is getting married at some stage and want my dad to move in with them so at least someone is going to take care of him. his partner is really over the top caring/submissive/trad fem so she seems to enjoy that and dad loves it lol.
I can totally relate. My dad calls me once or twice a week and visits me on a strict schedule the same exact time and day once a week. Anything we do together which is usually going to a sports game, I always have to initiate it. I stopped calling him because when he does rarely pick up, within 5 minutes he is already basically winding down the call, and i have to hear a long explanation of how he was up early today and is actually kind of tired so he wants to get off the phone and go to bed. I hear this "i'm actually kinda tired" routine to get me off the phone every phone conversation, whether he or I calls, makes no difference. I know better than to bring up a problem or a real opinion with him, because he has so little patience for my problems and his opinions are so overly positive about everything. I am convinced he loves my sister 1000 times more than he ever did me. If I bring up a conflict to him, his first reaction is, did i initiate it? what did I do? and i never handle any conflict correctly. He is just generally fed up with hearing about any problem i have or even very minor conflict. He has amazing patience with my sister throughout our entire childhood, unlike me.
I talk to my mom more regularly but it has been trailing off more every few years, I talk to her maybe 2-3 times a week but she makes me out to be a victim vaguely in every situation i bring up to her, even when it has nothing to do with the situation. like "I am sorry! That sounds terrible!"
I hate my sister's guts, and she only texted me about twice a year for birthdays and christmas etc. Trust me, I was justified in hating her, just takes too long to get into the details now. I have had zero contact with my sister or other relatives in over 5 years (other than my parents), and that includes missing Christmas's and Thanksgiving so I can avoid seeing my sister. (she is evil)
If I think about it, it is pretty messed up that my mom is the only one i am close to in our entire family, and everything else is fractured with everyone else. If I just go about my life and day-to-day activities, I just don't think about any of that, but if i have downtime and i see or hear other tight-knit families, it can start to mess with your head. Welcome to my white family, disconnected, cut-off emotionally, critical, distant, vaguely positive about everything in a phony way, i guess not every white family but it seems to be pretty common