Going to a Party when you have S.A.D.
A few years ago a friend of mine asked me to go to his party. I was exhausted that day but he convinced me so I decided to check it out.
Everyone was sitting in a circle in his apartment. I tried talking to other people but I felt like they just wanted to talk to their friends. They would never initiate conversation with me unless I started it, that started to get exhausting, after an hour I just gave up, stopped talking and was on my phone. Even my friend seemed busy talking to other people.
There was this girl there that just HATED me, she would yell things like "you are so weird" or "you never talk!" so everyone heard. I was shocked, like what did I ever do to you? I thought.
My anxiety was flaring up from being there but I stuck it out after a total of 2 hours I told my friend I was going to bail and left. Later my friend asked me if there was something wrong with me? I was like "what do you mean?"
He goes "people at the party thought you were strange"
I was ****ing furious but I didn't press on and just said. I was tired and let the conversation die down. but I should have asked him for more details. I wasn't rude to anyone, I was just quiet after the first hour and on my phone. And I didn't drink.
After that my "friend" never invited me to his parties again. He would send me snapchat pictures of his parties and never invite me to them, and I would never bring them up because he was my only friend. 2 years later we aren't friends anymore and I regret not calling him out on his ****ty behavior.