ever felt sad and lonely ? - Social Anxiety Forum
 
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post #1 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 12:46 PM Thread Starter
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ever felt sad and lonely ?


I kinda do.

THe only thing that keeps me occupied is my job....

despite it, i have no girlfriend. i have pretty much nothing to do off my days.

And im fighting a problem, i have an hypertrophic scar on my face. I kinda scratch the skin off , and hoping that once it heals the hypertrophic scar goes away....

it seems to work but with time.

Like whatever. I'm tired of being at home alone on my own always.

I think that would be nice to have a girlfriend one day.


I really feel like my life is going nowhere .


and i lost a lot of money for some reasons. so i dont have much in my bank account.... I'd need like 6 months at least to be able to afford doing a trip to another country.
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post #2 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 01:34 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by user533 View Post
I kinda do.

THe only thing that keeps me occupied is my job....

despite it, i have no girlfriend. i have pretty much nothing to do off my days.

And im fighting a problem, i have an hypertrophic scar on my face. I kinda scratch the skin off , and hoping that once it heals the hypertrophic scar goes away....

it seems to work but with time.

Like whatever. I'm tired of being at home alone on my own always.

I think that would be nice to have a girlfriend one day.


I really feel like my life is going nowhere .


and i lost a lot of money for some reasons. so i dont have much in my bank account.... I'd need like 6 months at least to be able to afford doing a trip to another country.
I can feel you. I also know this feeling of always going home after work... just to be alone. Always alone.

I can't imagine how it would feel to have someone around with whom you can share bad and good moments.

It seems so easy for most people but nearly impossible for others.

I can't really say anything to help you but at least you know you are not alone. Good luck

"Rome will lose the faith and become the seat of the antichrist." ~ Our Lady of La Salette
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post #3 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 02:01 PM
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I feel it everyday. And sometimes it is even worse

I don't have anyone to love, even to have sex with

I used to be lonely, upset with it but I don't know why there was someone ask me out to go to crowded places, I rejected

I have a big debt and I don't know when I can save enough money to travel. Money and work, problem to me too

I used to play video games at days off. But everything seems fading away, not interested in anything any more. I don't know how to keep me alive in this society

I obsessed with my appearance, always feel insecure and can't speak in front of crowd

Sorry for talking all about myself. I just wake up from sleep at mid night and have a terrible feeling, lonely, empty and scared. I just want to write it down here. But I also feel for you. Good luck.
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post #4 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 02:29 PM
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Almost everyone is afraid of talking in front of crowds or public speaking so don't think your alone on that. Last time I heard it was the #1 fear besides loss of money. As debt goes, you are also not alone. Many people and students have debts to pay off for a long time and many people continue to go into forclosure and bankruptcy. As far as love and sex, the world is in love with their phones and the sex is on their phone as well so there is less sex in real life. Once again, not alone.
If you worry about your appearance, then you probably look better than 80% of people. And video games are fun but mostly a waste of time.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Doraemun View Post
I feel it everyday. And sometimes it is even worse

I don't have anyone to love, even to have sex with

I used to be lonely, upset with it but I don't know why there was someone ask me out to go to crowded places, I rejected

I have a big debt and I don't know when I can save enough money to travel. Money and work, problem to me too

I used to play video games at days off. But everything seems fading away, not interested in anything any more. I don't know how to keep me alive in this society

I obsessed with my appearance, always feel insecure and can't speak in front of crowd

Sorry for talking all about myself. I just wake up from sleep at mid night and have a terrible feeling, lonely, empty and scared. I just want to write it down here. But I also feel for you. Good luck.
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post #5 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 03:02 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doraemun View Post
I feel it everyday. And sometimes it is even worse

I don't have anyone to love, even to have sex with

I used to be lonely, upset with it but I don't know why there was someone ask me out to go to crowded places, I rejected

I have a big debt and I don't know when I can save enough money to travel. Money and work, problem to me too

I used to play video games at days off. But everything seems fading away, not interested in anything any more. I don't know how to keep me alive in this society

I obsessed with my appearance, always feel insecure and can't speak in front of crowd

Sorry for talking all about myself. I just wake up from sleep at mid night and have a terrible feeling, lonely, empty and scared. I just want to write it down here. But I also feel for you. Good luck.
IF you had the money, where would you go? Would you travel alone?

"Rome will lose the faith and become the seat of the antichrist." ~ Our Lady of La Salette
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post #6 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-10-2019, 04:09 PM
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@EndTimes
In real life, I want to go to Japan, where hikikomori live. And I love their culture and manga too.

In imagination world, I have super power like Captain Marvel and travel to outter space all by myself. Flying to anywhere I want like a bird.

And I don't have any friends so definitely travel alone. But I lack some social experiences, I don't know how to get visa, how to prepare stuffs for traveling, what do I do when I get there, how to find cheap accommodation, vehicle... A lot of things I don't know, I'm scared to be defraud and stolen all my stuffs, stuck there and can't go back home. Or even worse, I will be sold by some human traffickers. Scary.
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post #7 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-11-2019, 08:15 AM
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Yes of course.


I go to a running club and even feel lonely there, from time to time.


I'm an introvert so I am ok with a lot of quiet time, but sometimes it gets too much.



I briefly had a girlfriend last year and we went out to a few places together (restaurant, the park, the seaside). That was nice and I totally took it for granted at the time. However, I recognise that I cannot rely on a relationship to cure my lonliness. Women can also be very emotional! It's hard.
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post #8 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-11-2019, 08:39 AM
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I feel a bit upset and isolated, but never sad and lonely. never!

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post #9 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-11-2019, 09:07 AM
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Well, in my present situation, you'd have to be a lot weirder than I am to not be sad (at least some) but honestly, not lonely. Things only get lonely when I have nothing to do. If I had no internet, then yes. I'd be lonely. I don't really communicate with people online so much as I just feel like I'm part of the world when I watch them and sometimes interact. Not a day has gone by since the day I first logged onto the internet when I have not been thankful that I am able to do that mental trick. That I can (somehow) satisfy my need to connect in a way that probably most people would find hollow and meaningless.

I think maybe it comes from the fact that I'm old enough to remember what it was like before. Sitting in a back corner of the local library thumbing through ancient books was what counted for connection. Listening to American Top 40 on a cheap radio every week was my social connection to the world. Admiring some girl I had a crush on but knew absolutely nothing about because I wouldn't dare speak to her or do anything obvious enough that she would even know I existed. I mean, that's the dictionary definition of loneliness, IMO. When you're so cut off you can't even speak. To anyone. At least on the internet I can do this. What I'm doing right now would have been impossible (for me) in 1990. In 1990, I was watching TV all day long every day. And maybe occasionally I would go out late at night and just drive for no reason.
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post #10 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-11-2019, 12:09 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Doraemun View Post
@EndTimes
In real life, I want to go to Japan, where hikikomori live. And I love their culture and manga too.

In imagination world, I have super power like Captain Marvel and travel to outter space all by myself. Flying to anywhere I want like a bird.

And I don't have any friends so definitely travel alone. But I lack some social experiences, I don't know how to get visa, how to prepare stuffs for traveling, what do I do when I get there, how to find cheap accommodation, vehicle... A lot of things I don't know, I'm scared to be defraud and stolen all my stuffs, stuck there and can't go back home. Or even worse, I will be sold by some human traffickers. Scary.
Don't mean to be rude to you - but that's a hell of a lot to be scared of. I think you'd probably have to try to have all those things happen to you.

A lot of the things with travelling is just doing it - it gets easier the more you've done it.

I get sad and lonely quite often - I miss my family and the life we had before. But then again I can call them and I'm seeing them this afternoon, so it's not so bad really.
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post #11 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-11-2019, 11:00 PM
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I'm always sad and lonely, but rarely exclusively. Lot of equally negative emotions competing for my attention.

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that's a hell of a lot to be scared of. I think you'd probably have to try to have all those things happen to you.
My luck's pretty bad. I could make it happen.

Is it just me or is it getting crazier out there.
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post #12 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-12-2019, 12:40 AM
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I'm always sad and lonely, but rarely exclusively. Lot of equally negative emotions competing for my attention.



My luck's pretty bad. I could make it happen.
I actually do get a bit scared of travelling sometimes - especially just before I go. But once I get started I'm usually alright. When I landed in Bangkok a few years ago I had no idea where to stay so when I got out of the taxi I just followed these two girls that had backpacks on. They were nice - I ended up staying across the hall from them.

I've had bad times travelling though - but it was always in my own head. I've had times when I couldn't really leave my hotel room for a few days, or felt very self-conscious etc. But plenty of other really great times when I met great people - it all comes down to how you're feeling. Most of those really horrible things you hear about will never happen in a million years.

You just need to be vaguely careful. I've done really crazy stuff when I was manic - and I was fine even then, although I could have just been lucky.
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post #13 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-12-2019, 07:16 AM
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Depends. I'm alone most of the time. I occasionally feel lonely, but for the most part I'm happy to be alone. Being around people isnt always a good thing


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post #14 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 06:47 PM
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Ditto


For the moment, my job is what's occupying my time as well.

There's probably nothing stopping me from going out.... and really, the only object is money and time.

I need to go out more though. Need to be free.

Though I have always made it my practice to be pleasant to everybody, I have not once actually experienced friendship. I have only the most painful recollections of my various acquaintances ..."
― Osamu Dazai, No Longer Human
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post #15 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-14-2019, 08:34 PM
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I'm sad and lonely right now.

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post #16 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-19-2019, 10:19 AM
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This is me basically 24-7-365. I am in a particularly bad stretch at the moment as I hate the holidays and everything they represent.
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post #17 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-19-2019, 04:50 PM
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Sad and lonely is my default state. Which is not to say I don't aim for happiness, or take steps to get there. I do, and happiness visits from time to time. And I appreciate the visits. But the older I get the more I have begun to accept that sad and lonely is a natural state for me. And that's not necessarily wrong or bad.
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post #18 of 18 (permalink) Old 12-24-2019, 05:48 PM
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Yes all the time. I go from periods of being lonely to not as lonely.
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