Do you dread going to work each day? - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 11:50 AM
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Yes I dread it.

The thing that kills me is it doesn't have to be as bad as people make it. Work could be done without all these stupid meetings, phone calls, begging the boss to tell me what to do, playing his macho head games, etc.

I remember a couple years ago going to see some shrink about how much trouble I was having talking at work. He told me, "Remember that they're all on your side. They want you to succeed so that you all can get things done."

I'm not blaming the therapist because he didn't know the situation, but he was DEAD WRONG. The environment here is that me and the boss are opponents. He lives to cut you down. Never tells you how to do anything then complains because you didn't read his mind.

Even if everything was the way he wanted it, he would make up some criticism. It's a huge power trip, head games thing and I don't like it at all.

It's very difficult to be motivated to work for someone who you know won't like anything you do. Will find a way to rip everything apart and it's all because I refuse to play kiss *** like these other people. Just because I'm not a flowery speaker rushing in there to brown nose everyday I get the damn shaft.

I think my goose is cooked, but I'll hang in as long as I can because there's no way I could get anything else right now.
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post #22 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 04:02 PM
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I'm just working a crappy part time job while I go to school, but I have somehow arrived at the point where I now look forward to those 2 days a week when I have to work. I joke with people that I would do my job for free, so any amount of money they want to pay me is just a bonus.

There was a definitely a time though where I dreaded going to work just because of the boredom. Some simple strategies to make the day go by faster:

- Never look at the time
- If you're off at 5:00, convince yourself that you're actually off at 10:00. There is absolutely nothing for you to look forward to at 5:00.
- If it's a Friday, convince yourself that it's a Monday.

i trained myself to do these things, and they helped to make my crappy boring part time jobs a lot more bearable.
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post #23 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 04:22 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by fine View Post

There was a definitely a time though where I dreaded going to work just because of the boredom. Some simple strategies to make the day go by faster:

- Never look at the time
- If you're off at 5:00, convince yourself that you're actually off at 10:00. There is absolutely nothing for you to look forward to at 5:00.
- If it's a Friday, convince yourself that it's a Monday.

i trained myself to do these things, and they helped to make my crappy boring part time jobs a lot more bearable.
Haha I actually do this sometimes. And it really does work. Sometimes I try to convince myself that I'm finished earlier around 3. So when 3 o'clock comes around, I say to myself "only two hours left" and it actually goes by a lot faster. At least it seems to.
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post #24 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 08:50 PM
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This post really speaks to me, unfortunately! Absolutely hate, dread with every fiber in my body, going to work. I have had some jobs in the past that I've liked, and excelled at, although they certainly had stress too. However, now the dread comes over me like a thick, smothering blanket, that chokes me and keeps me from seeing anything clearly but how much I fear going there. I feel like I have no friends there, that no one likes me, and that it's dead-end. I know I need to find something else asap, but it pays well...however not sure that the stress is making it worthwhile! Don't think I can cope much longer. Very much feel for others in a similar boat!
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post #25 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 10:00 PM
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Yes. The dread begins at 3:30 pm when I leave work and culminates at 5:00 am when I have to get up. Every day I tell myself I am going to call in sick, but I always force my way into the shower at the last minute and make it in with about two minutes to spare. I have taken to beginning the dreading of Monday on Friday, which increases the velocity of the weekend tenfold. It may as well be Monday every day. But it could be worse. I could be out on the street. I have this computer so I can get on SAS, so there are worse things in life than hating your job.

...you gotta keep the goal in mind, develop tunnel vision to a certain extent. it's hard, and it's not for everyone.

~bad baby

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post #26 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 10:49 PM
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At my old job in Manhattan..every morning stand waiting for the elevator I clearly stood out being the youngest there, I hated those moments so much. The cubicles didn't have full walls so there was zero privacy at my work station which caused a great deal of discomfort. People were unsanitary in the kitchen and bathroom. People also knew who my father was and I felt like I was treated differently. Other people on the floor acted like I was a spoiled prince or something and the managers sucked up to me. Just wanted to be treated normally, I did all my work on time while other people on my team feel behind and spent their time gossiping or slacking off.
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post #27 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-17-2011, 11:42 PM
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I don't dread it. I'm uncomfortable there, don't talk to anyone unless I need help. They think I'm weird I guess, but they tolerate me. The money is good.

"I take what is mine. I pay the iron price."
―Balon Greyjoy
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post #28 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 06:21 AM
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Originally Posted by moneyman View Post
There are varying degrees of dread. I think some are normal but some are poisonous. Here are the various degrees I've experienced, from worst to best -

- Pure dread. This one is most poisonous. The dread starts on Sunday evening and already you feel ill about work. You have difficulty even getting out of bed on workdays, and your commute is heavy as you emotionally try to prepare for another horrible day. You need to find another job or way of earning a living ASAP because life is too short to live like this. It's not worth it. Get out.
This is me. And you are totally right. I have said exactly that to myself. Life is too short to do this to myself. It's bad for me in every way. I work in an office and while the work itself is at least somewhat interesting, I just cannot stand the people in my office and sitting at a computer all day. When I go out for a walk at lunchtimes, and see everyone else who isn't working, especially people my age just hanging out or going to school with their friends while I have to spend 8 ****ing hours a day around a bunch of losers, I just feel so jealous and depressed.

The only positive thing to come out of this is that I've come to realise what is really important to me in life. I don't care about money, career, status or what others think of me. I don't want to be chained to a desk and have to conform to someone else's hours. It's like being in bloody school, just without the fun of hanging out with your friends!

I know it sounds idealistic, immature even, but I want to do something rewarding that is not about making money, but just doing something good for the sake of it. What I value is my freedom, free time, and relationships with others, so I'm going to find something that I actually enjoy doing, even if I never become rich doing it. Life really is too short to waste away in a job you hate.
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post #29 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 09:14 AM
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I feel the same! I don't want to work; but my parents force me to. Everyday is just like hell, now. They said it's good for me, I'll get used to it soon. But, they don't know how I feel pain. I began to work about 2 years ago and I still have same fears! I'm still shy, I'm still afraid to talk to the people, I still can't feel good in crowded places...
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post #30 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 11:32 AM
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thats why am out of the job market right now !
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post #31 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 11:46 AM
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Yeah I can relate. Up until a few weeks ago, I guess I was stable - I had been in my role for 5 years, gained respect and made friends, but I still had many, many problems (thinking certain colleagues didn't like me, thinking the women there thought I was a creep, because of my odd stares, etc, etc).

About a month a go I decided to test myself and go for a position in a top company. I was so excited, but 2 1/2 weeks into the job, although I love the location and the role itself is great, I feel like I'm having the same anxiety issues I had when I started in my old positions 5 years ago. Not knowing when to say 'hello' to people, thinking colleagues don't like me - it's very difficult. I'm assuming things will get better over time, but right now, after being in a relatively comfortable environment, socially, I'm finding the mental adjustment draining. I guess it's hard for anyone, but for sufferers of SA It's very difficult.

It's easier for me to get closer to heaven
Than ever feel whole again....
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post #32 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 11:55 AM
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Only if it's a morning shift.
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post #33 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-18-2011, 02:51 PM
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I believe if people had less hours to work but made the same amount of money, they'd be more productive. Eight hours (plus commute time) a day is way too much time to be spending locked in a cubicle. When I was an intern in an office I sometimes wasted time because I worked fast and had nothing to do for the rest of the time I had per day.

If I had a business that was successful enough to hire employees, I would only make them work 6 hours a day and they could work outside if it was nice weather.
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post #34 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 04:37 AM
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I have anxiety just going to college. Just a really immature bunch here.
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post #35 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 01:12 PM
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When things are going bad I dread it, if not I just dislike going to work.
Its mentally draining to deal with the social aspect of work.

The work itself is not that hard except for the phone. Just dread making every or answering every phone call. Fortunately the person I work with likes the phone so she handles most of it.
what I really dislike is all the small talk, the hello's, how was your weekend...
Passing people in the halls (do I say hello again at 11:00 or ask how their day is going or just walk past and come off as rude?) is tough. I try to make the long walk to the bathroom or front door when I know the cost is clear.

I hate just BS-ing like most people I work with do, so I get my work done quick and surf the internet (thankfully I can) and keep to myself.
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post #36 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 01:53 PM
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i do. i hate my coworkers so much, theyre not the brightest. i am in the army though, so deep down i know i did this to myself.

"We need compassion to help ourselves get started, and enlightened self-interest to get ourselves serious"

-Paul Collier
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post #37 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 02:23 PM
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Not really, but I'm just a piece of meat to them.

"We're like family" What a crock!

I like the crew I work with, though
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post #38 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 02:27 PM
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I don't dread the people at work, but I dread the work itself. It's overwhelming at times.

Sometimes...on Sunday nights....I cry.

The first thing I instinctively say every morning when waking is "*****." That about sums it up.
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post #39 of 101 (permalink) Old 05-20-2011, 03:13 PM
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I hated having to go to my last job. My manager kept uttering under her breath that I was unsocial to the other coworker. Sorry I have SA lady and I get quiet a lot!! I didn't even mind the hard work involved, it was just having to work alongside people the whole time with me having nothing to say. Needless to say, I quit a few days later
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post #40 of 101 (permalink) Old 06-04-2012, 04:36 PM
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I sooo get this


Quote:
Originally Posted by yellowdiamonds View Post
Every day I come home from work, I'm really tired. But I try my best to stay up rather than going to bed early, mostly because I feel that the next work day will come around too quickly...because every day when I get into work I think to myself "it feels like I've just been here...".

Wow, someone else who feels like I do. I seem to have some anxious obsession with time and it ALWAYS feels I am there at work.
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