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-   -   Do Pretty Girls Live In An Alternate Reality? (https://www.socialanxietysupport.com/forum/f35/do-pretty-girls-live-in-an-alternate-reality-1671273/)

bogeyj 12-01-2015 11:20 AM

Do Pretty Girls Live In An Alternate Reality?
 
the world just treats them differently. they always have an endless supply of male orbiters ready to take care of things for them. seinfeld has a great scene which pretty much sums up what i'm talking about

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kb72AJDFAjE


has anyone seen the types of things genuinely pretty girls can get away with first hand?

reddit also has a thread on this very topic

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/c...at_is_it_like/

interesting read.

SilentRobot 12-01-2015 11:21 AM

They don't live in an alternate reality. We place them in an alternate reality.

Boby89 12-01-2015 11:25 AM

This reminded me of my old workplace. It was a sausage fest and everytime a new girl was employed, she was constantly "surrounded" by at least 20 dudes ready to help her or to make her laugh. Funny thing is they made me laugh too, looking at them and seeing how pathetic they are.

Aribeth 12-01-2015 11:32 AM

Ehh I just tell myself they all have average or below average IQs to make myself feel better. Good thing I'm right about it though.

Ivoryivy 12-01-2015 11:39 AM

Being a pretty girl, I understand where you come from. I have been able to make a lot of money with my looks alone, but of course, the money wouldn't be made if desperate individuals weren't looking for it.

I don't live in an alternate reality. I admit that I have been spoiled in the past because of my looks, but in the end, it has always brought me more depression. The people that spend money on me only care about the superficial. I have never been praised for my intelligence or been able to be taken seriously in certain circles because I am attractive. Those people want just one thing; I have always been treated as a throw away, despite my intelligence. Other women don't like me because I am pretty, men only want to screw me, meanwhile I am desperately searching for meaningful relationships and constantly being ****ed around. It's not as easy as it seems. It leads down a spiraling path of self-hatred and anxiety, especially because I am pretty and quiet. God forbid. Everyone just assumes I think I am too good for them, but the reality is, that deep inside, I am thinking how ****ty of a person I am and how I must not be worth anything because anyone who pretends to care doesn't hang around for very long. So yeah, it comes with its own repercussions, I suppose. I am always finding myself in what seems like a meaningful conversation with someone, only to realize that they are just trying to take advantage of me, but yet, I am so desperate for that human connection, I go along with it anyway.

So, it's not all fun and games, at least not for me.

aaaa1111bbbb2222cccc3333 12-01-2015 11:40 AM

There's always pathetic guys around them fawning over them, treating them like they're the best thing that ever existed and generally acting as servants. Then it reinforces their belief that they're entitled to everything.

Boby89 12-01-2015 11:47 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083518841)
*sutff*

Well that's the passive dating game that women "enjoy". You don't have to bother approaching men, instead men come to you, the problem is you don't really get to chose which men will come.
Being more active in the dating game might work better for you, but who am I kidding we are on SA forum where men don't have the guts to approach women let alone the other way around.:frown2:

TicklemeRingo 12-01-2015 11:58 AM

Apparently there's this online thing called 'rinsing'.

Mondo_Fernando 12-01-2015 12:00 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bogeyj (Post 1083518641)
has anyone seen the types of things genuinely pretty girls can get away with first hand?

Where I live, women who look like that are common (some are models). They generally keep to themselves and ignore most things around them.

Same with men that look like that (blond, tall, etc), but are more friendly than the women are.

Ivoryivy 12-01-2015 12:03 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Boby89 (Post 1083518937)
Well that's the passive dating game that women "enjoy". You don't have to bother approaching men, instead men come to you, the problem is you don't really get to chose which men will come.
Being more active in the dating game might work better for you, but who am I kidding we are on SA forum where men don't have the guts to approach women let alone the other way around.:frown2:

I get that you may have bad experiences with women. People are ****ty in general, especially when it comes to dealing with social issues. At the same time, I don't understand the disdain for "pretty women" that a lot of men seem to have who have SA. Being treated as an object, which often happens, as well as being verbally abused, is prevalent. Just don't hate women for not giving you attention. There are a lot of good women (attractive ones, even!) who will talk to you. But then again, maybe I am only speaking from my perspective.

mjkittredge 12-01-2015 12:03 PM

It's the same reality we live in. Just a better side of it. Like living in a good neighborhood instead of the bad neighborhood, they're both still in the same city. It's not like you go up North street and all of a sudden you're in Narnia ffs.

As much as I sympathize with people like IvoeryIvy, I'd rather be in her position than in mine. She is always in demand and has lots of options, even if many are bad & disingenuous they aren't 100% bad. It isn't all men just looking to screw her and all women hating her because she is prettier. As opposed to me being marginally attractive and passed over for more beautiful guys, I'd trade places with her in a heartbeat and reap the rewards.

When it comes down to it, it's just a chemical reaction people get in their heads when they glance at you. Are you just another face in the crowd, or do you stand out?

Mondo_Fernando 12-01-2015 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083518841)
Other women don't like me because I am pretty, men only want to screw me, meanwhile I am desperately searching for meaningful relationships and constantly being ****ed around.

Happens to pretty men too.

Chelsalina 12-01-2015 12:09 PM

It's the enablers that makes pretty girls feel like they're entitled to anything. But it's not just pretty girls that are like this. A lot of fathers like to spoil their daughters and never discipline them, my father was like this. My older cousin has told me that she's always speeding on the highway because police officers never give her a ticket. The things pretty girls can get away with... They also could be stupid af and there'd still be guys falling for them.

Farideh 12-01-2015 12:18 PM

Well just think about it. The only reason why men are nice to pretty girls is soley out of perverted reasons. Not like there aren't men out there who treat everyone respectfully no matter how the girl or guy looks, but being kind to someone just because that person is attractive should not count as someone being kind, because the'y re not being kind to you. They're trying to get in your pants. I thought a girl wanted to just be friends until she started showing sexual interest towards me. I finally thought that a girl wants to be friends with me, but she was only befriending me to get in my pants which explains why I don't have any gal pals. Most of the time...guys and girls can't be just friends. They can, but people make it difficult.

Saitama 12-01-2015 12:38 PM

What? Doesn't everyone have a different reality?

Boby89 12-01-2015 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083519081)
I get that you may have bad experiences with women. People are ****ty in general, especially when it comes to dealing with social issues. At the same time, I don't understand the disdain for "pretty women" that a lot of men seem to have who have SA. Being treated as an object, which often happens, as well as being verbally abused, is prevalent. Just don't hate women for not giving you attention. There are a lot of good women (attractive ones, even!) who will talk to you. But then again, maybe I am only speaking from my perspective.

I think you missed my point, I was actually sympathetic with your problems. What I was saying is, if you seem to bump into people that don't treat you well, why don't you try to avoid them and why don't you approach the people that you feel you might like.
As I said don't be so passive, me more active. Don't let unwanted people come into your life instead you should make some first step to get some nice people.

Also, I never said I hate pretty girls. I hate, or better said I find pathetic the buffoons that spoil those girls.

Ivoryivy 12-01-2015 12:57 PM

tak
Quote:

Originally Posted by mjkittredge (Post 1083519089)
It's the same reality we live in. Just a better side of it. Like living in a good neighborhood instead of the bad neighborhood, they're both still in the same city. It's not like you go up North street and all of a sudden you're in Narnia.

As much as I sympathize with people like IvoeryIvy, I'd rather be in her position than in mine. She is always in demand and has lots of options, even if many are bad & disingenuous they aren't 100% bad. It isn't all men just looking to screw her and all women hating her because she is prettier. As opposed to me being marginally attractive and passed over for more beautiful guys, I'd trade places with her in a heartbeat and reap the rewards.

Eh, I have been sexually assaulted multiple times, been raped, been told that I couldn't be trusted all because of the actions of the men who did assaulting. I have had way more negative experiences with people than positive.

I may always have "options," but those options are exclusive to men who just want an easy lay and don't care about me as a person.

I am just trying to explain that sometimes being "attractive" can be just as much of a burden.

Ivoryivy 12-01-2015 01:00 PM

I may have come across as being too defensive. Sometimes it's hard to ignore those people, especially when you have social anxiety, because those are the only people who will make the effort to talk to you. And I, of course, have difficulty in starting any relationship unless it's initiated by another person. :(

Mondo_Fernando 12-01-2015 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083519921)
I may have come across as being too defensive. Sometimes it's hard to ignore those people, especially when you have social anxiety, because those are the only people who will make the effort to talk to you. And I, of course, have difficulty in starting any relationship unless it's initiated by another person. :(

It's ok. :)

Chin up. :)

Todd124 12-01-2015 01:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SilentRobot (Post 1083518665)
They don't live in an alternate reality. We place them in an alternate reality.

Exactly.
Because a huge chunk of society place beautiful people on a pedestal,
as being physically attractive is viewed as important we separate them from the rest of us.

It's quite sad really, especially when beauty is subjective.

scarpia 12-01-2015 01:20 PM

It actually works for both sexes. They did it on the show 30 Rock with Jon Hamm in the episode called "The Bubble". Liz found out that her boyfriend Drew (Hamm) lived in a "bubble" because of his good looks, and has never experienced many of the unpleasant things in life.He easily got out of traffic tickets and was offered jobs whenever he applied.

DiscardYourFear 12-01-2015 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Todd124 (Post 1083520169)
Exactly.
Because a huge chunk of society place beautiful people on a pedestal,
as being physically attractive is viewed as important we separate them from the rest of us.

It's quite sad really, especially when beauty is subjective.

What's this you are talking about, girlie?

You are one of the beautiful people. :smile2:

Sad Larry 12-01-2015 01:27 PM

As a pretty guy its no too bad. People are nice to you. And in todays day and age they understand if I'm quiet cause I'm also intelligent. The only bad times is when you get raped but you can get over it after a while

Todd124 12-01-2015 01:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DiscardYourFear (Post 1083520297)
What's this you are talking about, girlie?

You are one of the beautiful people. :smile2:

I thank you kindly for the compliment :) However I always feel that attractiveness is a personal thing for everyone.

Somebody's rating of 5 is another person's 10.

DiscardYourFear 12-01-2015 01:29 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Todd124 (Post 1083520417)
I thank you kindly for the compliment :) However I always feel that attractiveness is a personal thing for everyone.

Somebody's rating of 5 is another person's 10.

You have a point there.

It's something that I need to think about.

bluehog9 12-01-2015 01:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083518841)
Being a pretty girl, I understand where you come from. I have been able to make a lot of money with my looks alone, but of course, the money wouldn't be made if desperate individuals weren't looking for it.

I don't live in an alternate reality. I admit that I have been spoiled in the past because of my looks, but in the end, it has always brought me more depression. The people that spend money on me only care about the superficial. I have never been praised for my intelligence or been able to be taken seriously in certain circles because I am attractive. Those people want just one thing; I have always been treated as a throw away, despite my intelligence. Other women don't like me because I am pretty, men only want to screw me, meanwhile I am desperately searching for meaningful relationships and constantly being ****ed around. It's not as easy as it seems. It leads down a spiraling path of self-hatred and anxiety, especially because I am pretty and quiet. God forbid. Everyone just assumes I think I am too good for them, but the reality is, that deep inside, I am thinking how ****ty of a person I am and how I must not be worth anything because anyone who pretends to care doesn't hang around for very long. So yeah, it comes with its own repercussions, I suppose. I am always finding myself in what seems like a meaningful conversation with someone, only to realize that they are just trying to take advantage of me, but yet, I am so desperate for that human connection, I go along with it anyway.

So, it's not all fun and games, at least not for me.

I have some theories that say that something like this is the case for many universally considered attractive young ladies. Over the last few years, it's occurred to me how I see so many attractive girls and women walk around with a 'default' look on their faces that appears rather mean or edgy. I want to say that this is due to a lot of the stuff you mention in your post going on in their heads, where it has gotten to the point where they are sick of it and are on defense due to the likely possibility of it happening again (and again).

I for one have often felt frustrated by this realization, when I feel some females I approach either friend zone me rather quickly or more often, cut ties completely and distance themselves. Often I have felt a bit of group punishment is taking place in the background, where their defenses are up really high and from there they may carry a preconceived idea about what a guy's intent is.

I mean, what if in the last month five guys approached her and asked her out, and all turned out to be blatant creeps who wanted sex after being aroused by that 'hawt' face and body? What if I come into the picture shortly after and end up admiring the whole package, in particular her intellect and cognitive capacity? What if I am now finding myself suddenly dismissed because I "freaked her out" after barely having any correspondence at all? Now I am sitting alone in a bit of a slump, wondering what the heck it was I did.

Moral of the story, guys who treat woman like objects can and do ruin it for those of us who are actually looking for love and companionship.

ThatLoserNoOneCaresAbout 12-01-2015 02:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ivoryivy (Post 1083519889)
tak

Eh, I have been sexually assaulted multiple times, been raped, been told that I couldn't be trusted all because of the actions of the men who did assaulting. I have had way more negative experiences with people than positive.

I may always have "options," but those options are exclusive to men who just want an easy lay and don't care about me as a person.

I am just trying to explain that sometimes being "attractive" can be just as much of a burden.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sad Larry (Post 1083520401)
As a pretty guy its no too bad. People are nice to you. And in todays day and age they understand if I'm quiet cause I'm also intelligent. The only bad times is when you get raped but you can get over it after a while

Hey OP and fellow ugly people, on the bright side, we will never get raped because no one will ever find us attractive enough.

Jesuszilla 12-01-2015 02:16 PM

Attractive women seem to be able to flirt their way out of everything. It's crazy. I remember being pissed off at my ex when she told me how she'd flirt to get out of a ticket or flirt with guys to get free drinks when she was out with her friends.
Posted via Mobile Device

Ivoryivy 12-01-2015 02:20 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bluehog9 (Post 1083520857)
I have some theories that say that something like this is the case for many universally considered attractive young ladies. Over the last few years, it's occurred to me how I see so many attractive girls and women walk around with a 'default' look on their faces that appears rather mean or edgy. I want to say that this is due to a lot of the stuff you mention in your post going on in their heads, where it has gotten to the point where they are sick of it and are on defense due to the likely possibility of it happening again (and again).

I for one have often felt frustrated by this realization, when I feel some females I approach either friend zone me rather quickly or more often, cut ties completely and distance themselves. Often I have felt a bit of group punishment is taking place in the background, where their defenses are up really high and from there they may carry a preconceived idea about what a guy's intent is.

I mean, what if in the last month five guys approached her and asked her out, and all turned out to be blatant creeps who wanted sex after being aroused by that 'hawt' face and body? What if I come into the picture shortly after and end up admiring the whole package, in particular her intellect and cognitive capacity? What if I am now finding myself suddenly dismissed because I "freaked her out" after barely having any correspondence at all? Now I am sitting alone in a bit of a slump, wondering what the heck it was I did.

Moral of the story, guys who treat woman like objects can and do ruin it for those of us who are actually looking for love and companionship.

I definitely put up a wall against anyone who tries to talk to me because I have had so many bad experiences with creeps, so what you said makes perfect sense. I wouldn't know who was genuine or who wasn't. Even in my current relationship, he was just in it for the sex, initially, until he found out I was actually a pretty cool chick and liked my personality.

People only judge others on first appearances. we are all guilty of that. It takes effort to really try and get to know someone. Unfortunately, it's almost impossible to differentiate between the people who have good intentions and the people who don't. But I know, as a woman, that if a man talks to me in the right way and doesn't give up, really tries to get to know me, etc, that I will give him a chance.

ChairmanWow 12-01-2015 02:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by bogeyj (Post 1083518641)
the world just treats them differently. they always have an endless supply of male orbiters ready to take care of things for them. seinfeld has a great scene which pretty much sums up what i'm talking about

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kb72AJDFAjE


has anyone seen the types of things genuinely pretty girls can get away with first hand?

reddit also has a thread on this very topic

https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/c...at_is_it_like/

interesting read.


I think that sometimes. Life seems to better for those who good looking; guy or guys. I've gotten to the point where I just don't attention it anymore. I keep telling myself that just a woman is attractive doesn't mean she is better than me. She's a person just like me

JTHearts 12-01-2015 02:37 PM

you people need to stop putting women on a pedestal

nordision 12-01-2015 02:42 PM

I always tell myself that they just have a huge ammount of makeup that's why they are so beautiful and most of them without makeup are ugly and you don't recognise them.

that weird guy 12-01-2015 02:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DiscardYourFear (Post 1083520297)
What's this you are talking about, girlie?

You are one of the beautiful people. :smile2:

exactly.
attractive people always say looks dont matter
rich people say money isnt everything
:serious:

DiscardYourFear 12-01-2015 02:49 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by that weird guy (Post 1083521865)
exactly.
attractive people always say looks dont matter
rich people say money isnt everything
:serious:

Wait, what?
I don't think money is everything, and not only am I poor, I'm in debt up the wazoo.

that weird guy 12-01-2015 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by DiscardYourFear (Post 1083521953)
Wait, what?
I don't think money is everything, and not only am I poor, I'm in debt up the wazoo.

oh i wasnt saying you think this i was just pointing out that rich and pretty people act like its a "burden"

nordision 12-01-2015 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by thedevilsblood (Post 1083518849)
There's always pathetic guys around them fawning over them, treating them like they're the best thing that ever existed and generally acting as servants. Then it reinforces their belief that they're entitled to everything.

And a lot of times, these types of guy are not attractive for them, most of the times they look to the only one, who is different, it's not her servant and he is treating her with respect but not as a servant, or it's even a little cold with her(girls are attracted to this thing), 10 servants are the same all of them, but if from 10 guys 9 are servants and 1 it's not, that guy will be interesting for her I think.

theotherone 12-01-2015 04:05 PM

Life is a facade

Pretty girls = good liars

Unless ... loyal n honest n respectful which is 2 rare

bogeyj 12-01-2015 08:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ThatLoserNoOneCaresAbout (Post 1083521161)
Hey OP and fellow ugly people, on the bright side, we will never get raped because no one will ever find us attractive enough.

speak for yourself dude

rdrr 12-01-2015 08:46 PM

People who can get things that you can't, live in a different world than you.

DistraughtOwl 12-01-2015 08:51 PM

Seeing as how the only attractive girls I ever seem to find are online or unattainable in some other way. They might as well live in an alternate reality.


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