Can anyone else relate?
(I pretty much need to vent a bit, so please bear with me). So basically, Iíve been the loneliest person on the planet this past year. When high school ended and college began, I was thrown into a whole new world of isolation. I went to a really small high school (my graduating class had 7) and I knew everyone there. I always had people around me who (at the time) were my friends. I could talk to them easily, and always count on at least someone saying hi to me. When college started, I knew nobody. I have a hard time making friends, but I believed that I could at least make 1 to 2 friends. Well, my first semester I made no friends. Not even an acquaintance. This is also about the time I realized that the people I knew in high school werenít really my friends, more of just people I was forced to be around. Spring semester came along, and I had kinda given up on everything really. I had no motivation or passion for anything. I had been diagnosed with and started taking meds for SAD around November, and in the spring time I felt like they actually did nothing. So, without telling anyone, I stopped taking them. I feel better now that itís been so long, but I had withdrawals from the medication. Iím glad I got off of them. Summer came along and I quit my job of 2 years (thank goodness, that place was noting but stress). I found a new one and I really enjoy it. I joke with my coworkers that I donít have friends and Iíll die a hermit with cats. One of them always says ďbut you made friends here. Weíre your friendsĒ. Well yes they are, but they are all roughly 20 years older than me (expect for like 3). Because of this age gap, I feel like I canít relate to them and that they really arenít the ďfriendsĒ Iím looking for. Fall semester just started, and all around me I can see new friendships being formed. And the people who I thought at least remembered my name from a previous class, have no idea who I am. Itís like I donít exist in this school. I go day by day walking in the halls like a phantom. No one knows Iím there and no one cares. I have no friends from high school who talk to me. No friends from my old job who talk to me. The people I talk to most of the day are my mom, the cats, and the dog. Yup. Iím that person. I have no one else to talk to, so I talk to the cats and dog. They are literally the only friends I have at this point. I still have no motivation or passion about anything. I feel like more of a pointless blob than a person with life.
Iím sorry to anyone who reads this because of its length, but I just needed to vent somewhere because I donít have anyone to vent to. Also, I know this post is very selfish.
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