Anyone else going through tough times right now? - Page 2 - Social Anxiety Forum
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post #21 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-25-2020, 01:12 PM
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Originally Posted by dotBSC View Post
I don't intend to sound selfish, not at all. But in your case there are clear signs from objective point of view why one might say that it's tough for them and absolutely everyone would understand.
Those things, hardship, is incredibly hard to compare without getting into another person's skin. If we can all agree that let's say very severe depression at the point when the person all could think is suicide is as bad as it gets.. Then the question arises how can we compare circumstantial and chemical hardship.
I didn't even mention the chemical hardship ATM, as I thought that went without saying. I haven't been this depressed in about 10 years, and my anxiety is constantly ramped up. There are things I can't say on this board because it'll just get deleted, or maybe get me banned. So I won't. But I'm pretty much done with everything.

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post #22 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-25-2020, 09:47 PM
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This has been a crazy year, even before the whole virus got started. I really expected some of it was coming anyway. In my experience, when crap happens, it starts to really pile on, so I guess I'm not that surprised. I'm just trying to push through it, and hoping greener fields are ahead at some point, even if I can't see it yet. In fact, I know there will be.

Sorry to hear about what you're going through. I know what you mean about feeling disconnected mentally from the things you like. I've had the same, it is the stress and depression that causes it.
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post #23 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-29-2020, 02:16 AM
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I'm feeling depressed now. Mainly about work situation.
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post #24 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-30-2020, 02:28 PM
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Things started out great for me and then slowly got worse as the months flew by. Things are strange and I donít know howís I feel about things most of the time nowadays.

I had several girlfriends and hookups over the course of this year and slowly they all left me AND blocked me. There were only a few girlfriends or acquaintances that I decided to leave because I was unhappy with them and now I just have a FWB relationship.

I also got fired last week despite my efforts to do the best I can at my job. Been there since last November and they just gave up on me like that. So now Iím trying to apply for unemployment benefits but since I never worked at a job for more than a year, I donít think Iíll get anything. Itís just very unfair and cruel.

On top of that, my health isnít exactly good either Iíve been having extreme toothaches. Might be due to an infection in my wisdom tooth so in a few hours, Iíll be at the dentist for the first time in my life. Hoping for a good recovery.
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post #25 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-30-2020, 08:35 PM
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Yes. My therapist mentioned day treatment recently, twice a week. I'm like, okay. I see. I don't disagree
But I can only imagine it's like this for everyone, even "normal" people. Even celebrities with their privileged lives. Even those blissfully unaware, even the ignorant. Even those that are "okay"
Music seems to be a saving grace lately.
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post #26 of 29 (permalink) Old 07-30-2020, 09:53 PM
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Just depression being depression. Anxiety has been a bit bad as well. Normally im alright, but right now i care a little too much about people looking at me, especially when im being laughed at, which people actually do sadly.
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post #27 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-06-2020, 01:43 AM
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I have to live with my parents right now because of the whole covid thing and they are not easy to handle. I don't even remember the last time i had a good laugh. I try to tell myself that everything will be ok but sometimes i feel like giving up. I don't find any reason these days to live for.
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post #28 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-06-2020, 05:44 PM
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Well, I'm of no value to anyone, little more than a disease vector, a carbon footprint, a danger to women and children, a public eyesore, and a threat to civilization. My life is unrelentingly painful and most people would rather I not exist, even though they won't come right out and say it. But they also won't let me die with dignity because they have ideological objections to the only rational response for a person in my circumstances, and I can't find a way to do it without traumatizing someone. So yeah, times are tough, lol.

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post #29 of 29 (permalink) Old 08-10-2020, 11:01 PM
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I have gone to 800 or 900 pro sports games, (the last 9 years I've been going alone) and a ton of movies before the coronavirus disaster. I finally had time to rest and my body physically shut down, and all i want to do is sleep even 3 or 4 months later. To the last poster, I feel like i am staying alive basically to pi** people off. Not much of a social life to speak of. My business took off on ebay, but I still feel like a worthless loser. Still hanging on to hope that a woman i had a FWB over 4 years ago will take me back, doesn't look like much of a possibility. A few girls wanted to keep seeing me, either they wanted me to pay for everything or they were boring so i cut them off. The one's i liked I got impatient and scared them off. Not liked in my town or the entire New York City area. Even throughout the coronavirus, except for maybe March or early April, all I see are people out dating and laughing with their friends or boyfriend/girlfriends, as if everything is completely normal. Every time I see a hot chick in public with or without a guy, i want to literally commit suicide. I try to not go out as much as possibly to avoid seeing hot chicks, it is literally to the point that I feel much better never leaving and exposing myself to everything I am missing. And NO ONE is going to convince me the grass is not greener. I would rather date the ugliest girl on the planet and argue with her 10 hours a day than spend another year or 5 with my cat. If I could pretend I am not missing out, I could maybe think staying in reading and watching TV isn't half bad. I have a nice apartment in a rich area and a few rooms, decorated beautifully, and no one ever visits. The poorest bums I see in public manage to be walking with hot chicks often, so there ya go. What a life. I also work my azz off on my online store last few years, and everyone in public still shuns me, so what is the freakin point of anything, i may as well shut down the store, i am just too far into it and invested literally hundreds of hours to perfect my listings, otherwise i probably would have ditched everything. Want to move to the country or anywhere without crowds and attitude and congestion. My neighbors apartments are all scrunched together so not a lot of room to breathe. I like the idea of living in the middle of nowhere alone with miles of space around me. My life has been going to pro sports games and movies cramped in seats next to people or standing or in tiny train cars with a lot of delays and sweaty people all around me, so that would be a change i guess. Hard to say if I would lose my mind faster in the country with acres of land around me or just staying in my current situation. I am in the middle of New York City with more things to do than anywhere in the world and I still couldn't get a freaking date most of my life. And it wasn't like i was a shut-in, I was out at a game or movie or event almost every night, so I was OUT in NYC and couldn't meet anyone
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